T. R. Okuna Profile picture
~ It eluded us then, but that's no matter - tomorrow we will run faster, stretch out our arms farther ... And one fine morning... ~
General Baimungi Marete Profile picture Karanja Profile picture ThePrescription📃 Profile picture EMMANUEL M MUSYOKA Profile picture Makaveli Profile picture 57 added to My Authors
Jan 13 6 tweets 2 min read
No, I do not believe that most men go into friends with benefits (FWBs) out of fear for responsibility that comes with relationships. Men fall in love with their dreams 1st before they fall in love with women. Until the dreams are actualized, they do not feel deserving of love. Yet the physical needs cannot be ignored. The more liberal pay for sex in brothels. The less liberal seek a convenient domestic arrangement (FWB). I think it is for the best too. Because a man's love for a woman is useless, unless it is for himself first.
Jan 11 4 tweets 1 min read
This radio was reserved for the owner - Mr. grandfather - his favorite wife, & his favorite grandchild. Batteries would only be considered dead after a thorough beating, drying in the sun, & whinging "chwiiii" from the radio. The radio was to remain clean at all times.

-Courtesy Image This radio slept in a cabinet/cupboard. It had its special, hand-knit "kitambaao/otamba" to cover it. When it was news hour in the afternoon, everybody was to keep quiet & let the radio do the telling. Anything that moved was courting death. Even the dogs knew not to bark.
Dec 24, 2021 6 tweets 2 min read
Maybe I am old school but I would like it if my woman joined my mother & sisters in the food preparation process. The same way I would join her father & brothers in erecting the tent. It's not the act, it's the symbolism. Europeans call it gender roles; we call it community. We do that which brings us together. Each man according to his ability. The men with their muscles carry logs. The women with their grace bless the hearth. When Europeans look at it, all they see is the labor. But for the African people, it is about love and kinship.
Dec 23, 2021 5 tweets 2 min read
I'm for vaccination: I'm not for the imposition of it. One's body, one's prerogative. My liberty to swing my fist ends just where your nose begins. If COVID-19 vaccination were as efficient you would not need to worry about the unvaccinated. Choice, not decree. Especially with Africa in context, calls for imposition of vaccination is the preserve of those who routinely seal their anus to stop diarrhea. Covid inequities prevent equal access to the vaccine. Different vaccines, different outcomes. There cannot be uniform immunity. Yet.
Nov 20, 2021 7 tweets 2 min read
I died in my dream last night. The brakes jammed, the uber driver panicked, & a bus rammed into us; pushing us down the cliff. You could hear noise everywhere as the car rolled. It was dark except for the intermittent patches of light seeping through the shattering windows... I was afraid. I had not anticipated it. I thought to myself, "Maybe if I could reach the door, I might live". Yet, I couldn't be bothered to move. It was hopeless. I reached for my seat belt, but even that was hopeless. It was too far off. I sat still and made peace with death.
Oct 11, 2021 5 tweets 1 min read
Can you marry alone? Please! Marry your wife, or husband alone! We have demanding things to attend to: school fees, our parents' welfare, rent, medical fund drives, police bribes. Overbearing tax. Please, if you are my friend, marry your wife alone! A wedding is not an emergency! You find yourself in 5 wedding groups, all in December, all asking for contributions: is wedding a heart attack? Didn't you know you were going to wed in December? Must you wed? In fact, come-we-stay has been scientifically proven to last longer. Don't play with people, bwana!
Oct 9, 2021 4 tweets 1 min read
My favorite writers didn't come within an inch of the Nobel prize. Mark Twain didn't. In fact, Charles Dickens won no awards at all. Yet, they shaped my world view. Taught me to believe. To be kind. To dream. Art's true ovation is not in awards, or "spaces". It is in inspiration. True art does not seek praise. Or recognition. Or notoriety. It just is. Any acclaim is welcome, but not demanded.

As for me, should a kid read my work, a decade after my death, & say to himself, "because you lived I will work harder, be kinder". It's all the award I need.
Oct 9, 2021 4 tweets 1 min read
Why black men shut you out in turmoil:

1. You weaponize their low moments/truths.
2. You made it clear that struggle (particularly financial) is a weakness.
3. Social conditioning (negligible)
4. Women subscribe to emotion-focused coping, men to problem-focused coping. If it were 2 or 3 men saying this, your counter arguments would hold. This is the entire earth of black men, telling you... that you are doing something wrong.

It's simple maths, men experiment with little truths earlier on: if this is not met with calm optimism, they adjust.
Sep 28, 2021 14 tweets 3 min read
I used to talk to people in buses. I don't anymore. See, one time, when I was heading home, I sat next to an old guy in a matatu. Old guy looked alright, soft-spoken, had a receding hairline so you know I'm thinking, "lots of wisdom here." The devil had been trying me lately... And I kind if needed someone to talk to. So we struck a conversation. He tells me his name is Jethro...I say my name. We do small talk, "government this, government that...global warming", I am impressed by his depth. I figure I might as well open up to Jethro for advise...
Sep 12, 2021 18 tweets 4 min read
This one time I was living with my girlfriend & dog. Our relationship had thawed coz her parents were nagging: "Oh goat swallowed a salamander"... Oh! the cows needed more salt". I was tired of their ass! If a cow was old enough to demand salt, it was old enough to work for it. She would take it out on my poor dog. Saying he is big-headed & eats too much. I said, the dog was eating just fine. It's her parents' cows that had the tastebuds of a dinosaur. Things were not good. Then by some chance, we got a new neighbor, Opija.
Sep 2, 2021 17 tweets 4 min read
I stopped going anywhere with Ochi because the fool once stopped to hit on a policewoman with expired insurance. Back then there was a roadblock right after Mau Summit on your way to Londiani. I ate watery cabbage & porridge in a cell. We had not even been flagged down! We were delivering some stationery to Busia. Ochi says we should start early. He has a sticker in his car, reads: "bro's before hoes!". He puts on some gospel. "When Jesus says Yes, nobody can say no!" I am thinking, this fool has really changed.
Sep 2, 2021 6 tweets 1 min read
It's always the married men warning young boys to stay away from married women when they relentlessly chew these young boy's girlfriends & sisters. Can't have your cake & eat it. Contract is with your wife. She can think. If she can't, why did you pick a bread for a wife? And why a man would kill another man over a woman, I do not understand for the life of me. Don't people have lives outside women? Friends? Career? Business? School? Lose all that? Because of a pricked ego? Too fragile a masculinity, something will always prick it.
Aug 30, 2021 7 tweets 1 min read
Letter to an Ex: The Man's Guidebook:

1. In the 1st paragraph, start with "I will understand if you don't reply"...then proceed accordingly...

This is very important. It is what I call subtle nudging. You are basically pretending to have accepted the separation. Pressures her. 2. Introduce your tribulations at her departure.

How much food does not feel the same. How much the other women snore in bed. You are pampering her ego. That she feels special. And everyone loves to feel special, don't we?
Jul 31, 2021 11 tweets 3 min read
Last week on my way to the city, I made the mistake of riding shotgun in a matatu. I never ride shotgun. Why? Coz the last time my teeth were knocked out in a scuffle between a policeman & the driver. The driver had implied the policeman had farted. Police whooped both our asses. But I was in a hurry, & shotgun was the only option. So I risked it. The driver looked reasonable, not one to tell the policeman he had farted. I even got him some juice & water. He told me good morning & buckled his seat. Yes, stammered a little but decent guy by all standards.
Jul 30, 2021 6 tweets 2 min read
It's my belief that one's relationship is a reflection of their state of mind: discernment, virtues, and/or ambitions. People pick what they subconsciously relate to even if they won't openly acknowledge it. There is no problem with marriage, the problem is individual. We are a generation of selfish, insecure & demanding overlords. Who are just as boring as we are loud. And it is always someone's fault, never ours. Instead of healing & adjusting, we turn pain into campaign. We conjure childish rules to mechanically regulate social relationships
Jul 29, 2021 4 tweets 1 min read
In no other country would @DCI_Kenya wear ignorance so majestically in the name of threads. There's a place for everything. A state agency tasked with the delicate responsibility of reporting crime & criminal activity cannot assume the language of porn sites & recipe vlogs. Crime is not funny. It is also not a canvas on which one sharpens their penmanship. When you do that, you reduce the report to a comical event. This is why you don't find humor in crime documentaries. The report should inform - serve a deterrent function - not entertain.
Jul 19, 2021 4 tweets 1 min read
My courtship style is so patient, so curious - so confident - it is liable to be misconstrued for absence of desire in the city. I know no pick-up lines. I have never had use for them. I ask people about their lives, I observe them. In the end, we grow into each other. Or not. I have come across women who would ask after 2 days: "tell me what you want", or "T. ask me already": hoping I would declare desire. I find that quite unoriginal & uninteresting. I mean, you are a whole book, and we are on page one. How can I love you when I don't know you?
Jul 13, 2021 6 tweets 1 min read
How to win an argument unethically:

1. Pick a single part of the other's argument & attack it.

Ie. Your girlfriend is accusing you of cheating with Anita several times. Focus on the several times, tell her she is lying: "it was only one time". Hold it there. Don't budge. 2. Pick a related but irrelevant topic & attack it.

i.e. Your girlfriend is shouting at you for cheating with Anita.

Focus on the shouting. Tell her she should not shout at you. Say, "you don't respect me". Hold it there. Don't budge. She'll get defensive, you've won.
Jul 13, 2021 4 tweets 1 min read
So you peed on yourself at work...

Or you bought a new dress & are not sure people will like it...

Or maybe you have pimples on your face & it makes you feel unattractive...

Maybe your wallet is empty, you fear people can see it...

2 concepts: The spotlight effect & Sonder. The spotlight effect:

This is an anxiety born of regressive self-consciousness.

You imagine that people are focusing on you just as much as you are focusing on yourself.

They are watching you, laughing at you, talking about you.

It is not entirely true.
Jun 20, 2021 6 tweets 1 min read
If the primary goal is to earn followers on Twitter, I think the route is quite simple. Be as sensational as you can, comment on the trending/charged topics, with sustained grammatical flair. Originality is not a prerequisite. If the primary goal is quality of interactions, originality will be demanded. Optimism is a prerequisite. Individuals have to deal with a lot in their daily lives, they do not come looking for another stressor in the form of tweets. They avoid sensationalism. They want discourse.
Jun 5, 2021 5 tweets 2 min read
No. I disagree. @CordNasa can't abdicate its "role" to the country because it isn't answerable to the country (The venerable majority); but its supporters & manifesto. To hold the opposition accountable for the country, you must 1st afford it licit hegemony over the country. We are in this hole because of an administration of brazen neanderthals & an equally venal citizenry who put them there, secretly identify with the fecklessness & do not wish to suffer the individual cost of removing the administration there. So they hide in "the opposition".