I could write jokes for 800 years and I'd never think of something funnier than Trump booking the Four Seasons for his big presser, and it turning out to be the Four Seasons Total Landscaping parking lot between a dildo store and a crematorium. Also the twist that they announced Biden won DURING the conference, and Rudy asked which network called it, and the reporters said "All of them"

Finally some good news, scientists discovered a treatment that can reduce COVID19 transmission by 70%, and its just a piece a cloth you wear in front of your dumb fucking face Truly cannot understand why people don’t want to wear masks, it’s not like they’re expensive or uncomfortable or awkward, it just prevents people from dying. It’s the lowest risk, highest reward.

NYC friends, I noticed all the undercover cops are wearing white arm bands, probably to recognize each other. Be careful. Historically, is it a good or bad sign when violent police forces start wearing matching armbands?

And on the first day God said “um so I made a thing” And on the second day, God RT’d it and said “This.”