Fergus Butler-Gallie Profile picture
Clergyman and author. Editor at Large, The Fence Magazine. Current book ‘Touching Cloth’ available to order below.
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Aug 20, 2022 10 tweets 4 min read
Visited my favourite cafe in Istanbul today- I have others that are more ‘authentic’ or otherworldly or glamorous- this one, the Palatium is all pixelated photos of kebabs on menus and lukewarm pina coladas. However, the people who work there are sublime and, it has a secret. Underneath the tables, chairs and hookahs of the Palatium Cafe are the most preserved remains of the The Great Palace- the power centre of Byzantine Constantinople at its height.
Jul 10, 2022 13 tweets 4 min read
Been having a look at the official logos of Tory leadership hopefuls and now feel sufficiently informed to judge them. Number 1- Penny Morduant. Looks like a logo for an accountancy firm where the senior partner also spends their weekends taking part in re-enactments of the Battle of Waterloo.
Dec 9, 2021 29 tweets 9 min read
Seeing as it’s in the news I’m going to speculate wildly about what past Prime Minister’s Christmas parties would have been like based purely on their vibes. May: meticulously planned (6:23pm- Mini Mince pies go into oven. 6:26pm- Philip presses shuffle on Classic FM Xmas playlist), but actually disastrous. Someone would be electrocuted by the tree, Philip Hammond would be given a swirlie by a visiting carol singer etc. Image
Jan 22, 2021 4 tweets 2 min read
Ever wondered what the unremarkable siblings of your favourite literary characters might be up to? Wonder no more!

Delighted to have helped inflict new characters like Walter Wonka, Hubert Humbert, and the Cat in the Cone on the world via @The_Fence_Mag
the-fence.com/online-only/sh… As has been said elsewhere, tag yourself, after many journeys to and from it I’ve got to be Euston Bear.
Jan 20, 2021 4 tweets 1 min read
Really strong ‘Alien addressing the child who took it in for one last time before it returns to its home planet’ vibes to Trump’s farewell speech. Image Vital, in the midst of it all, not to forget the astonishingly weird way in which that man used the English language. Utterly utterly bizarre.
Jan 20, 2021 4 tweets 2 min read
Had a lot of fun contributing some serious stupidity to this, the only inauguration take you need. For once the ‘On the Buses’ reference wasn’t me! (the HMS Pinafore one was). Also absolutely 10/10 mock up of Blair’s would be inauguration by @alexschristian
Jan 18, 2021 17 tweets 5 min read
It's the week of Prayer for Christian Unity so going to share some of my favourite ecumenical pics. 'Well, we'll just leave you one of the leaflets and then when yer mam gets home she can give us a call' Image
May 7, 2020 18 tweets 4 min read
I replaced the titles of Biff and Chip books with Wikipedia article titles:
Apr 7, 2020 44 tweets 14 min read
Right as per this- I’m about to start watching Carry On Cleo, a take on Anthony and Cleopatra that makes Shakespeare’s look like a masterclass in Egyptology. Once again I am using a DVD from the weird set of Ponzi scheme magazines which my mad grandmother thought were a perfect gift for pre-adolescent me.
Jan 19, 2020 17 tweets 5 min read
It’s the week of prayer for Christian Unity so here are a few of my favourite ecumenical pics: ‘Eeee, you got a Rennie? I can feel that dhansak repeating on me’
Dec 9, 2019 4 tweets 1 min read
I would like Brian Blessed to do all readings in church tbh. He’d actually be great doing a recording of some of Paul’s angry letters- ‘you FOOLISH Galatians’.
Aug 21, 2019 13 tweets 6 min read
Donald Trump as Kings of Israel: 1. Saul, the jealous king

‘Saul was very wroth, and the saying displeased him; and he said, They have ascribed unto David ten thousands, and to me they have ascribed but thousands and what can he have more but the kingdom?
And Saul eyed David from that day and forward.’ 1 Sam 18
Feb 25, 2019 15 tweets 5 min read
Oh my goodness the reconstructions of the faces of Roman emperors are *gold* Nero spends every weekend over the course of the Six Nations wearing an Ireland shirt (even though he's from Kettering) and waits in pubs praying for an English fella to spill his pint.
Dec 31, 2018 19 tweets 6 min read
As English counties are urged to fly their flags, here's a handy guide to them all: telegraph.co.uk/politics/2018/… 1: Bedfordshire- branding for fishmongers staffed exclusively by LSD users. Image
Dec 12, 2018 14 tweets 4 min read
I'm sorry but every single person involved on both sides of the Brexit thing looks like the secondary, slightly rubbish antagonist from an unmade Disney film. This bloke tried to turn a decrepit but homely tenement into apartments only to be foiled by a group of plucky dormice in an unmade film of 1987.
Nov 2, 2018 39 tweets 21 min read
I have a long and boring train journey ahead of me today so here's a thread of post Reformation Archbishops of Canterbury as crisps: Rowan Williams- Thai Sweet Chilli Sensations.

Complex and with clear Eastern influences, Rowan is the flagship flavour of the Sensations range. Yes it's the sort of crisp you could take to Cambridge high table but it's also a crisp with an air of dark, Dostoevskyian mystery too.
Oct 21, 2018 13 tweets 4 min read
Your night out, told through the medium of statues of Queen Anne: 9pm: pre drinks- done, gear- on point, taxi- ready.

(Queen Anne, Kingston upon Thames market)