Royally F*%ked - Buckingham Palace's PR Fallout Continues..

This story isn't going anywhere. We're still none the wiser.

And every day that goes by without confirmation of her welfare, they allow the narrative to be shaped by others... 🧵👇 So what's happened in the last 36 hours?

Well... U.S. media (nowhere near as subserviant as our own, recall Dear Reader how it was U.S. Press Orgs who first killed "The Photo" while UK Press just blindly retailed it as an assurance that everything was fine...

So... this time next week we'll be in the thick of the Rwanda vote. Again.

Here's everything you need to know about what this policy is and why it's coming back to the Commons... 🧵👇 The Tories have presided over the biggest, most deadly fall in living standards on record

That is the story. Forget all the other noise. Focus on that just for a second

But "living standards" is a broad term, isnt it?

What does it actually mean?

The West is headed for a Trump Dictatorship and the ways to avoid are about to run out.

Some cheery thoughts to help brighten your Monday... 🧵👇🏻 After Jan 6th, many hoped it'd be the catalyst for de-Trumping the Republican Party.

How could the party of Law and Order consider a previously rejected candidate who was so okay with civil disobedience?

Well Hello, Good Morning and Happy #EpsteinClientList Day to those who celebrate 👋

What's actually happening? How have we got here? And MOST importantly..

...my thoughts about today's likely revelations... So first, the background:

Epstein had his own private island, Little Saint James, which sat within the U.S. Virgin Islands territory.
It's just under 80-acres & secluded;

Narcissistically, he called it "Little Saint JEFF".

Locals called it "Paedophile Island".

Owing to the Truss Awards (and Sunak's impending doom) you'll no doubt be seeing a lot more of this revisionist bollocks soon...

The idea that Liz Truss’s premiership was cut short by a woke, Liberal, "globalist!" Establishment.

It’s utter fucking garbage and here’s why… 🧵

Truss won the Tory leadership off the back of Conservative Party *members* who hold core conservative values:

Small state & low tax.

She committed to slash taxes on day one.

Here Is Why UK Politics/Media Is So Fundamentally Fucked...

Morning who wants to talk about how a story *becomes* a story? About why we're in such an utterly abysmal state in this country?

Let's do this... Forgive any typos, daughter had me up at 4 & she'll pay for this dearly when I FIRST have the opportunity to embarrass her as a teenager.

Deadly serious. I'm gonna drop her off at parties dressed as Big Bird or some shit.

Anyway...

Some thoughts / an Explainer on this Mercer / Vorderman thing, for those who are not quite across it...

Fred Thomas is a Labour candidate, who - at the GE - will be seeking to take the Plymouth seat from Johnny Mercer... On 27th Dec, Fred posts a tweet highlighting Johnny's Feb 2023 commitment to "end homelessness" among armed forced veterans.

https://twitter.com/FredThomasUK/status/1740027154577158621

Object Lesson In Why The Tories Are Fucking Shit M8..

In May 2022 - desperate to move on from Partygate - Boris Johnson & his Minister for Brexit Benefits, Jacob Rees Mogg, announce exciting new plans to take Britain back to the 70s, by abandoning Metric and reverting to Imperial. The move follows Mogg's personal 2019 initiative in which he ordered his staff to only use metric.

Oh, AND to caveat/label non-aristocratic men with "Esq." in all communications

[reports staff caveated references to Mogg with their own choice of word remain.. unconfirmed]

Some thoughts on Tamworth and MidBedfordshire...

1/ it's being reported these results are the biggest ever swing of a safe seat to an opposition, in British political history.

Many saying it shows the depth of feeling against Tories. But from what i've heard it actually stems from Tories just *staying home*.

This was a similar anomaly as helped the Tories win so decisively over Corbyn in 2017.

Here are some thoughts...

1. Charlotte Owen thing isn't going away.

Someone's going to need to explain why this young, blonde woman was gifted a peerage for seemingly no reason.

2. I have honestly no idea what is happening with the Rogan / Vax doctor thing. 3. If Tories all abstain from voting on the Johnson thing today, it will be a mark of extreme cowardice. It's a free vote. He's been found guilty or to have lied at least.

The idea they should fall in line to protect their own, above interests of Parl democracy is gross.

Red Wall Tories *still* supporting Johnson, STILL adamant he's the World King, he shall not be criticised, sinister forces! IT'S ALL A STITCH UP!

...sounding a lot like Michael Jackson fans outside the courtroom of his *second* Child Molestation trial. "The video of the party is a deep fake! They're probably civil servants! Or Crisis Actors! MICHAAAAEL!"

Hosepipe bans are going to be the new front of the culture war.

Expecting a few people to cut back so everyone can fare a little better ticks a lot of the same Jab/Mask/Climate boxes, doesn’t it? twitter.com/i/web/status/1… “Why should I cut back, Gary? We’re an island, we’re surrounded by water! And what about these refugees? I bet they’re drinking OUR water! Besides why do we need to bathe anyway? We never had daily showers in THE WAR! In fact, you know what Gary? The very concept of daily showers… twitter.com/i/web/status/1…

Johnson lied to the Red Wall over Brexit.

One of those constituencies was Bassetlaw.

They abandoned Labour to vote for this bellend.

No *wonder* he defends him to the ends of the earth.

Without Johnson’s lies? Brendan would just be some poor kid’s RE Teacher;

Still preaching… twitter.com/i/web/status/1… Similar to Jonathan Gullis.

Both Tories, 2019, Red Wall, former Teachers; rode in on a Brexit wave - a tsunami created by the earthquake that was Boris Johnson.

I look fwd to their 2024 ejection like Robbie Williams looks forward to Rat Pack night at the end of the pier.

Our Politics are locked in a Symbolism v Substance culture war - & even the Suella/Speeding story can't swerve it.

Morning Thread...🧵 Over the weekend the @HarryYorke1 @ Times published this scoop:

That Home Sec (and careerist empathy-bin), Suella Braverman, tried to wriggle out of having to take a speeding awareness course with members of the general public.

thetimes.co.uk/article/suella…

The forced hand in *hiring* her
The NatCon speech
Now Sunak’s inability to sack her..

Moderate Conservatives are always like “where’s the voice of moderate conservatism!?!”

Well, this is it. Here.

& its a weak, near-death whisper.

Its saying “Suella is defacto Prime Minister” Sunak has a choice, doesn’t he?
He can accept that he is unable to sack the rabid, right wing Rottweiler he gave Home Secretary to when he was placating the loony wing of the Tory Party asylum.

in so doing, he tacitly admits she is really in charge.

OR…

Okay, some thoughts on the Philip Schofield drama

If you'll indulge me...🧵 First up, yes i know this is all very titilating & gossip'y and we should actually be worrying about our energy bills & mortgages
But gimme a break i literally never shut up about those and it's SUNDAY.

Having re watched the Marina v Mogg debate twice now I can confidently say it was the purest example of the dire state of modern politics you could wish for.

And here’s why… 🧵 The segment was about Free Speech, deplatforming, it was alluding to Cancel Culture in all but name.

He cited Roald Dahl, X/R.

He even brought in, specifically, the subject of the "Culture War".

Nice of the Tories to focus on everyone else’s Maths skills! I’d LOVE to help with this!

Here’s some new GCSE questions I’ve prepared:

If a Tory peer illegally lobbies to have her husbands corp get a contract, he makes £60m - she takes 50% of that - how much prison time should… twitter.com/i/web/status/1… If the Govt sign off on an outsourcing company (/donor) to provide a Test & Trace system for £37bn - rather than the £1bn cost Apple/Android version that other countries went for…

…how much should Universal Credit be reduced by?

Fuck me that Elon Musk / BBC interview was painful…

For the BBC. Christ. So many Qs could’ve been asked *and followed up on*

Instead it’s just redirects to “but do you have any regrets?” and that embarrassing For You sh*t, that the guy couldn’t think of one example to back up 🤦

🚨 You don't NEED to pay for Twitter Blue to keep Two Factor Authentication 🚨

Just move to a NON-text-msg method.

👇🏻 Here's a cheeky Step-By-Step for you sexy twittery bastards who might need a hand with this👇🏻 1. Grab your phone, download an app from the App Store (iPhone) or Play Store (Android) called "Google Authenticator"

Android
play.google.com/store/apps/det…

Apple
apps.apple.com/us/app/google-…

This is a widely used app that generates codes instead of waiting for, say, Twitter to text you 1