I no longer have any social media presence. Accounts claiming to be me, either here or anywhere else are fake
54 subscribers
Jul 18, 2023 • 12 tweets • 3 min read
My 'fishing' email account has landed another one.
"Dear brother in god, I have a large sum of money to distribute to Christian causes around the world, can you be helping me? If yes reply and tell me how you can be a soldier of the god"
I replied.....
"My work here is indeed serving the great god, I do this through my research in using swans as emotional support animals." He was quick to reply,
"Brother, I can help you, would a sum of $1.5 million help your work?"
Apr 12, 2023 • 40 tweets • 7 min read
A couple just called by in their camper and asked to park on our land, we had a brief conversation, they seemed ok so I said yes. Before they drove off, the man glanced up and said,
"Lot of Chemtrails today, I wonder if the NWO are spraying barium or thorium" I said,
"What"...
He replied,
"Barium and thorium, it's used for population control. forced sterilization you know, being going on for years, you should read up on it"
I glanced at his wife, she nodded enthusiastically and said,
"Norman knows all about it, he does a lot of reading on the web"....
Mar 16, 2023 • 27 tweets • 3 min read
Having dinner with some friends, at the next table there is the most incredible crashing bore trying to impress a girl with his knowledge of Milton Friedman economic theories and French wine. We are quietly taking bets on how long she lasts. So far only 15 minutes have passed.
He is pontificating on the UK budget,
"The problem with the poor is they don't understand consumption analysis"
Jul 26, 2020 • 82 tweets • 11 min read
From idiot son to Jules,
"Wind your neck in there sunshine"
Jules looks at me, I shrug. It is probably good that Jules (former front row with Castres) does not understand this.
I had somewhat cowardly ducked the question of why their house was decorated with EU flags and bunting. I was saved by our Mayor, a man on considerable French elan,
"This is a new regulation for, how you say, 'ex-pats"
Jul 7, 2020 • 82 tweets • 13 min read
Coming soon.
The story continues - how did the Idiot Son make it to the Dordogne, what did the Mayor think of him, how is that dog bite, where are his shoes?
All will be revealed.
Update.
Despite his trials and tribulations at St Pancras the idiot son did make his later train.
He arrived in Paris where he was astonished to discover that the city has more than one train station.
He has to cross Paris, he does not speak French, he has no shoes.
Jul 2, 2020 • 12 tweets • 2 min read
Text from our Mayor.
Every single person who works for the Mayors office will be there tomorrow plus the Mayor's wife and two sons.
WhatsApp message received,
He's just arrived at St Pancras station, his mother is with him to "see him off". He has my HP sauce..
Jun 29, 2020 • 66 tweets • 10 min read
Just had conversation with a British couple who have a holiday home near us. They voted for Brexit and have made no arrangements whatsoever for what happens on Jan 1. They have now discovered the reality of their situation.
The blame apparently is with "Brussels".
Quick follow up to this:
They have always assumed I am British and only recently discovered I have dual nationality. When I told them and revealed all my EU rights were protected I was told that was,
"very unfair" and "typical of the EU"
