ben schwartz Profile picture
Writer-Director: 84th Oscars, Letterman @NewYorker @Wits @VanityFair @theblcklst @TheBafflerMag 2017 NEH Public Scholar, née Suck's Bertolt Blecht.
21 Apr
5 Perfect Comedies 1930s

Animal Crackers
It's a Gift
Bringing Up Baby
5 Perfect Comedies 1940s

The Bank Dick
The Shop Around the Corner
Sullivan's Travels
To Have and Have Not
The Princess and the Pirate
5 Perfect Comedies 1950s

Sunset Blvd
Born Yesterday
Stalag 17
Our Man in Havana
North By Northwest
Read 12 tweets
26 Mar
Oh, my wife, she’s a bad cook. I mean bad. They say coronavirus can live on metal for three days. On her meat loaf, ten minutes.
She’s such a bad cook, when our dog gets fed he tells me not to beg. I know I got coronavirus. I was asking for it. I had no choice. They were out of DosEquisVirus.
And masks. You wearing the masks? My wife’s so worried about me getting the virus she makes me wear that mask everywhere. And I mean everywhere, not just during sex.
Read 10 tweets