Lesbian Death Bed: The Bed that Eats Pussy Profile picture
Cartoonist & text game guy, founder of the Midnight Society @midnight_pals Genderfluid transvestite goblin: 30% anima, 30% animus, 40% shadow. He/Him, She/Her.
jjvors Profile picture Charles Tarnen Profile picture 2 added to My Authors
Mar 2 4 tweets 1 min read
ok so i got a great idea for a new character! it's just gonna require knowledge of an incredibly obscure circa-2007 meme circulated only within an insular internet fetish community, the Jerry Lewis telethon where an actor portrayed the personification of muscular dystrophy (1/?) and the fact that a friend of mine confused said actor with an entirely different actor who portrayed Popeye on some local Saturday morning kids show in the LA area in the mid 1980s. but if you can synthesize those 3 things I think you're really gonna enjoy this
Feb 28 906 tweets 318 min read
in an attempt to understand its evolution from dude bro comic to terf Q horror vacui screed, i am reading the entire 20 year run of sinfest right now and you know what it's not very good so this sort of thing was pretty par for the course in 2000 (South Park was just then making racism COOL again after all) but still kinda surprised to see so much. i only remembered these early strips being all 'how to draw kanji' not THIS ImageImageImage
Feb 27 6 tweets 1 min read
funny how enid blyton wrote pap for babies & the british literary establishment was uniformly "this is brain poison." then jk rowling wrote pap for babies & the british literary establishment was uniformly "this is the legacy of english culture, john bull sheds a tear" enid blyton's work is actually pretty shit, but it is still very funny how for 50 years every right thinking tastemaker in the UK was all "we shall NEVER speak of this tripe" while every single moppet from newcastle to slurryshire was clamoring for more hot hot gollywog stories
Feb 27 6 tweets 1 min read
haha i ever mention my weirdo grandmother who could smell russians? here's a funny story completely unrelated to anything happening in the world today my grandmother, god rest her soul, came from berlin and long story short she lived there during the russian occupation right after ww ii. For years afterwards, she claimed she could smell russians. this was a thing she would say. we all thought she was making it up
Jan 2 4 tweets 1 min read
What do you call those stores, they have names like "the ducklings cottage" or "asparagus & bloom" and they just sell fancy soap, scent diffusers, and a small selection of quirky children's books about girl boss serial killers You know what I mean, every town has like 12 of them instead of anything interesting
Nov 23, 2021 14 tweets 3 min read
oh I guess we all like "relatable content for soft bois" webcomics now. I wouldn't know anything about that, I only read "humans genetically engineer furries, oppress them in subtle metaphor about racism" webcomics and "ditzy genie causes hilarious yet sexy gender swap" webcomics remember when they used to make entire webcomics about how great linux was? those were the salad days
Nov 22, 2021 6 tweets 1 min read
my wife has a friend who's one of those dullards who thinks that forever waffling in a "i need to hear more information from both sides" limbo makes her sound smart and it's the most aggravating shit to listen to right now, she's talking about how she wants to go to a trump rally so that she can "hear their point of view" because she thinks this makes her sound like a thoughtful brain genius who is open to new ideas
Jul 22, 2021 10 tweets 2 min read
Just watched Fear Street 1994 and I appear to be the only person thoroughly unimpressed. Just really long and disappointing, none of the gonzo fun I would have expected from an homage to 90s slashers. Glad that they didn't just slather on gratuitous 90s set dressing to pander to hogs, but then they kinda went in the opposite direction so hard that it didn't feel 90s at all
Apr 30, 2021 4 tweets 1 min read
There's a Trump chud at my work who congratulated me on how much Trump helped me with my student loan debt during pandemic & a Biden lib who congratulated me on how much biden helped me with my student loan debt during pandemic (spoiler: i never received any relief from either) See, the government sold my loans to a private company and then said "oops no student loan help to loans held by private companies! lol see ya" but they yammered about student loan relief until everyone's facebook uncle just assumed we all go it
Feb 22, 2021 13 tweets 2 min read
I had a dream last night that I was the commander of an elite deep state squadron of Transformers, tasked with a mission to take down the president of the United States who had gone mad with power. That president? Richie Rich. Unfortunately, the transformers all sucked so we had to spend several trillion dollars to design three all new transformers for the job. In my dream, though, they weren't real robots, they were just guys wearing elaborate plastic costumes.
Feb 19, 2021 14 tweets 3 min read
Jesus, one of the saddest things about living in America is watching people realize in real time that no help is coming just absolutely a shit country. Does nothing but rob & brutalize its own citizens without even the barest whiff of obligation that a medieval lord would feel for his serfs
May 10, 2020 104 tweets 10 min read
Quiet day so let's do a thing

1 like = 1 stupidly hot take about 1980s newspaper comic strips Bloom County is far less funny when you're an adult and can actually understand that the punchlines a obscure political points but rather just that "Caspar Weinburger" is a funny name
Sep 15, 2019 18 tweets 2 min read
GAIN WISDOM wait, i think this means that I reveal a fact for every like this image gets, right? I'm going to assume that.
Aug 12, 2019 9 tweets 2 min read
My boomer dad, whom I love, has very weird ideas about how work works

Me: 2 people just quit at my job
him: ah! So they're gonna promote you now?
Me: what, why would they do that? Now I just do 3 people's work
him: but they have to pay you more now?
Me: him: what if they privatize the parks?
me: they did. concessionaires run most of them now. ask me how that's going
him: how's it going?
me: poorly. they take the state's money and leave the parks to rot
Mar 2, 2019 34 tweets 4 min read
We're rewatching some old Star Trek: The Next Generation and damn wow they really jam Wesley down your throat constantly Picard: we're going to gamma episilon ellen tau for very delicate space negotiations
Picard: but first let's check in with wesley
Picard: wesley how do you feel about this
wesley: golly jeepers wow
Dr. Crusher: as a mother let me just say
Feb 3, 2019 39 tweets 10 min read
Baphomet is an entry level fuck demon, sorry to tell you Now Belphegor, that's a tough demon to love
Dec 18, 2018 25 tweets 4 min read
Now that the holiday season is upon us, I think it's time to reflect on an interesting Jewish custom called Nittel Nacht. What is Nittel Nacht, you ask? It's basically a Jewish Christmas celebration. WHAAAAAA So, in the 16th/17th century, Nittel Nacht was a Jewish celebration that took place on Christmas Eve. You threw huge loud parties, played chess & card games, and enjoyed food and drink. Pretty typical holiday party, really.
Nov 5, 2018 37 tweets 5 min read
Alright, in honor of the post-Halloween season, let's try another regional gothic thread. County by county, here's the murders, monsters, and mysteries that make up the best of Oregon Gothic. Baker: The Sumpter Valley Gold Dredge is reportedly haunted
by the ghost of a mechanic named Joe Bush, who leaves wet, bare footprints on
the dredge’s decks.
Sep 27, 2018 4 tweets 1 min read
Against my better judgment, I finally had to look at the Kavanaugh testimony because all the reactions here on Twitter make it sound like he's a fucking maniac. "having beers with light brushing my teeth" what
Sep 18, 2018 5 tweets 1 min read
Oops this whole time I didn't realize we were dragging Crumb because he got booed at the Ignatz awards! I thought we were just dragging Crumb because it's about damn time. But good that he was booed, too. Maybe finally we can stop pretending that his comics about "canned [racial slur] hearts" were scathing social commentary
Sep 17, 2018 4 tweets 1 min read

Robert Crumb really is a piece of shit. It's about time that we started to reckon with his legacy of awfulness. Also my favorite Robert Crumb incident is when some journalist interviewed him & Crumb said some milquetoast liberal anti-Wall Street comment and then afterward Crumb cried & begged him not to include that "damning" detail in the article, saying "Actually I love banks!"