oh no what if 35 y/o lwj time-travelled back to when he was very little, like maybe 3-4 years old, and his little self mistook him for his father 🥹🥹

((credit to @/nettledaf for the idea of lwj time-travelling)) bby lz is so tiny compared to his grown self. he does his very best to bow properly, as he is told he has to do when greeting his elders, but he is very scared. he knows this man is his father not because he recognizes him, but because no other adult would look so similar to him.

today's dumb thought is not dark-lwj, but more of a grey-lwj: has possessive thoughts and would be totally capable of carrying them out, but keeps getting expertly thwarted at every turn because wwx *knows* his husband. every time they bump into one of wwx's acquaintances and they start chatting, wwx automatically reaches into his bag and pulls out a brand new bunny plushie that lwj has never seen before.

if wwx knows beforehand that they will be meeting a friend, he brings an actual bunny.

today's specific thought is college TA omega lwj getting very annoyed during his discussion sessions because alpha wwx keeps revving his motorcycle and doing wheelies in the parking lot nearby and it's insanely distracting for everyone involved. yes i know this is very much feeding into bad-boy with leather jacket and motorcycle getting with uptight, proper, prim scholar stereotype, and guESS WHAT I'M GONNA KEEP FEEDING IT

today's thought is archaeologist lwj excavating an ancient tomb that has a shit-ton of protection, warning, and containment seals on it. his colleagues say it's cursed, but he disregards them.

until he lifts the sarcophagus lid and finds red-glowing eyes staring back at him. lwj:

yllz:

lwj: *closes the sarcophagus lid*

so much omegaxian stuff on my timeline is making me think of an au where omegas need to be claimed immediately after they present because otherwise their pheromones will drive nearby alphas to madness.

of course wwx doesn't present until he's in class at the cloud recesses. usually there are signs in the years leading up to an omega's presentation, so they have time to arrange a marriage or seclude themselves.

an unclaimed omega's pheromones are dangerous. prolonged exposure can induce insanity in alphas.

today's thought is lowly palace servant wwx flirting with imperial guard lwj one too many times and then suddenly finding himself being granted marriage to lwj by emperor nmj himself. lxc is the highest-ranked and most beloved consort in nmj's inner palace. lwj complained about wwx to lxc, who then giggled to nmj about it over tea, who—ever willing to please lxc and thinking that it's about time lwj marries—immediately grants lwj and wwx marriage.

today's thought is:

merlwj and sirenwwx clash during a territory dispute and… accidentally end up mating instead.

there have been previous examples of mer/siren hybrids, but they are very rare; the two species are far more likely to wage war than breed. mer people are omnivorous, social, and closer in appearance to humans—which encourages cooperation with them.

sirens are solitary, carnivorous hunters with powerful, luring songs. they eat humans.

usually, mers and sirens ignore each other. in some cases, they fight.

i just think it would be really, really, really entertaining if jzx decided to play matchmaker between yllz-wwx and lwj because he, accurately, deduced that they had feelings for each other.

plus, wwx being safe and cared for would make preggie jyl very happy. jzx is… predictably not good at matchmaking. but he is trying his best!! for his wife!! the love of his life and the mother of his child!! 😤❤️

jyl is very charmed, but repeatedly tells him that such efforts are unnecessary. she thinks wwx and lwj must figure it out themselves.

//nsfw //possible noncon maybe

today's mermay thought is: merxian always getting a little nervous whenever octopusji's tentacles get handsy (tentacle-y?) because it is alway so, so easy for one stray tentacle to wander into merxian's slit as the others casually restrain him. //possibly dead dove

y'all know what would be fucked up.

if octopusji was a sea witch who made a deal with merxian: in exchange for saving his foster family's home, merxian belongs to him—which is super useful, because mermaids are rare sources of powerful magic ingredients.

today's thought: enemies-with-benefits wangxian are generals during a war. every time they meet, they fight—and end up banging.

but in the silence that follows, wwx watches a sleeping lwj and decides that it would not be so bad if his side loses and he has to die by lwj's blade. it would not be a bad death, he decides. there are worse ways to die. at the very least, his life would end at the hands of someone he admires deeply—someone he could almost call a lover. lwj would make it quick, like the kisses they exchange before sneaking back to their camps.

today's short thought: modern au vet lwj finds a tiny liddol fox kit all shivering and wet and cold and huddled up in the hallow of a tree. he takes it home, despite its protests, to take care of it.

meanwhile, foxxian is panicking because a-yuan DISAPPEARED. after several days of searching, he finally tracks a-yuan down to a small vet clinic. at first, foxxian fears that it's a pest control place, but then he reads the sign at the door.

he scurries into the backyard and yips at the sliding glass door.

//bottomji //dubcon

today's thought is:

wen concubine lwj has served wen xu for years to keep his family safe. when he overhears wrh deciding to attack the cloud recesses anyways, he seeks out the yiling patriarch and compels him to protect gusu.

how?

lwj baby-traps him. the yiling patriarch is an enigma. many have sought him out, and none have gotten what they wanted. nobody knows if he's immortal, or undead; they just know he resides within the burial mounds.

during an imperial tour throughout the empire, the wens stop at yiling for a night.

//mpreg

college classmates wangxian have a one-night stand that doesn't lead to anything. neither of them confess, and they resign themselves to parting ways after graduation.

until, at their class's party after the commencement, lwj notices wwx declining a shot of whiskey. it's well-known that wwx enjoys his alcohol—he always has a jar of emperor's smile in his dorm—so it's no surprise that friends and classmates offer him drinks at their graduation party.

what's surprising is wwx declining them.

teen dragonji leaves his pearl unattended for literally like 5 seconds and when he turns back around, teen foxxian has somehow accidentally swallowed it.

dragonji is enraged and demands that foxxian cough it back up, but foxxian isn't sure how to do that 🥲 in foxxian's defense, the pearl is the *exact* color shade of the baozi he was eating and he just. sort of thought that. he'd left one on another table by accident.

today's dumb thought is:

cssr being the first demonic cultivator—yet she's nowhere near as well-known or as powerful as the grandmaster her son eventually grows to be.

why was she never caught?

through wcz's frankly staggering monty-python-and-the-holy-grail levels of denial. is he aware that his wife is a demonic cultivator?

yes.

will he ever acknowledge it?

no. ♥️

no thoughts, just tiny mothxian trying to sneak a taste of witchji's tea and accidentally falling into the teacup.

he tries to get out, but he can't. his fluff is soaked and his wings are heavy. so he has no choice but to sit there and wait for witchji to discover his crimes. witchji told him before not to try and drink out of his teacup.

"If you fall in," witchji had warned him, "you could drown—or you may suffer burns or chills, depending on the drink's temperature. If you'd like to taste what I'm drinking, just ask me."

*sits up in bed*

what if lan dragons have prehensile tails it makes no sense, but i really want bby dragonji's tiny tail wrapped tightly around the tip of his shufu's tail when they're sitting together and lqr just letting it happen because it's really cute 🥹♥️

tiny bby foxxian discovers his own voice one day and is very keen on using it as much to his advantage as possible. whenever he is the slightest bit inconvenienced, he throws his head back and screeches in his liddol bby voice as loudly as he can. his wolf father, wcz, is startled by this. yes, wolf pups are also vocal, but isn't this a bit too vocal? is his tiny son in pain? is he hungry? is he upset? wcz doesn't know!

he tries his very best to comfort his child with soothing licks and cuddles.

bby foxxian finds bby noodleji and decides that this is now his new chew toy.

yeah it squirms a bit and gives high-pitched growls and kicks at him with tiny legs, but that's fine. bby foxxian is teething and chewing on this small cold thing helps soothe his gums. meanwhile noodleji is AGHAST at the behavior of this fiend!! how dare he?? noodleji is not a toy!! he's part of the legendary lan dragon clan!! who does this scoundrel think he is, chewing on him??

fortunately, the fox pup's teeth are tiny and don't hurt.

no thoughts, just immortal huli jing yllz having to shift to baby fox form to heal and hide away from jgs and his pursuers.

cue him being discovered by toddler dragonji who decides, at that moment, that he really, really, really, really wants a pet. the dragon child is a risk. he could easily alert others to yllz's presence. yllz strongly considers briefly morphing back into his true form to scare him away.

but the child says nothing. he leaves, but soon returns with a chicken skewer and holds it out.

ur shittin me

it's raining and my ceiling is LEAKING my ceiling is a good 10+ feet above me. I don't have a ladder, and the table closest to it won't bring me even close to it. tf do I do now.