actually when i think about it i'm surprised no one has written a fic where madame lan escapes with lwj and raises him as an assassin
she was clearly strong enough to kill an elder of the lan sect, and also had a good reason to hate the cultivation world... idk, is it just my brain?
Sep 13, 2022 • 23 tweets • 4 min read
courtesan wwx is invited to a jin banquet, where jin zixun pays him to seduce second young master lan.
everyone knows lan wangji is a stick in the mud and will take great offense to a courtesan draping himself all over him, so the jin disciples think this is a great joke.
wwx thinks this is deeply stupid, but he can't afford to offend the jin sect (....again) so he simpers and bats his eyelashes and slinks over to lan er-gongzi.
Aug 27, 2022 • 101 tweets • 17 min read
threadfic cw dubcon
bottom!lwj
so idk, what if wwx *did* become corrupted by resentful energy and became a dark quasi-emperor, with his palace and his harem of ghost girls? and lwj had to figure out how to save him?
wwx helps defeat wrh but after that something in home goes... wrong. it doesn't happen immediately. he does save the dafan wen. but the burial mounds tips him over into something else. someone else.
first: the burial mounds grows.
Mar 24, 2022 • 14 tweets • 3 min read
cw cisswap
i don't often have thoughts about f!bottom lwj but idk there's something really tasty about the immortal yiling matriarch being offered a concubine and receiving lwj in a thin robe of silk and thin gold chains and nothing else
to tie this to the prompts for #wlwangxian today...
wwx has been offered unwanted girls and women for centuries. illegitimate daughters, maids, mistresses. once they enter the burial mounds, they're lost forever.
Mar 24, 2022 • 4 tweets • 1 min read
cw cisswap
anyway i am Thinking About femme crime boss yiling matriarch making butch, strong lwj - most vicious woman in the lan crime family - kneel before her. but i realise this is probably niche content
wwx in a black dress with red, red lips smiling as lwj slowly takes off her suit jacket and removes her gun from its holster. lwj glaring, gold eyes cold as she slowly kneels down.
Feb 24, 2022 • 232 tweets • >60 min read
cw mpreg
what if wwx uses magic to erase everyone's memories of him and the dafan wen to protect them? it works really well! they're safe and forgotten!
...meanwhile, lwj is very confused when he realises he's knocked up but has, as far as he knows, has never had sex 🤔
lwj is a smart man and also has a VERY good reason to notice that something in his memory is missing. something big. he tracks the absences and realises he has forgotten... more than one night. significant parts of his life.
but as much as he tries, he can't find a solution.
Feb 22, 2022 • 4 tweets • 1 min read
lwj is sent to intimidate the new upstart demonic cultivator yllz and somehow ends up seducing him, which is funny because he's not TRYING to seduce yllz and also he's objectively terrible at it
lwj, striding toward the burial mounds, expression glacial, posture ramrod straight, sword in hand, wearing approx 38 layers
wwx: i see how it is
wwx: they've sent a temptress to seduce me
emperor wwx has a harem and no heirs. wq, his advisor, has pointed out he may have to sleep with one of his spouses in order to have heirs but wwx isn't going to do that! he's busy!
secretly wwx wants love ok 😭 he did the political thing and got hitched but he wants his first time and all times to be with his soulmate 😭😭
Feb 5, 2022 • 28 tweets • 5 min read
cw mpreg (kind of dubcon?)
#PregjiSeason soon after lotus pier burns lwj dreams of being fucked by wwx. they've never had sex in real life. never kissed. lwj doesn't even know if wwx returns his feelings.
when he realises he's pregnant he thinks it's a curse, at first.
cw mpreg
i just think if you get your core removed and then develop a new form of cultivation you can accidentally dreamfuck your crush and knock them up with your baby, as a treat
Feb 4, 2022 • 4 tweets • 1 min read
FUCK why do i have a downvote button?? i was trying to heart a tweet and i fucking pressed a downvote button WHAT IS THIS CURSED THING
TAKE IT BACK @Twitter I DON'T WANT IT
Jan 3, 2022 • 8 tweets • 2 min read
i realise this isn't where my 'courtesan warprize lwj' thoughts should be going, but what if yllz tries to abscond with wrh's favourite courtesan and grabs the WRONG ONE
everyone knows wrh adores his favourite courtesan, has written rhapsodic love poetry about his unblemished skin and midnight hair etc etc, so wwx sees lwj and goes 'yeah that's definitely the right one'
meanwhile, lwj is the Worst Courtesan Ever. definitely not the favourite.
Dec 27, 2021 • 8 tweets • 2 min read
cw omegaverse
can't stop won't stop thinking about alpha lwj going into rut and his friend beta wwx 'helping' him out and realising he's extremely, extremely into being treated like lwj's slutty, needy omega
wwx is supportive of his alpha and omega friends of course! but he doesn't have heats or ruts and like most betas is just like, 'scenting??? biting?? seasonal horniness? thank god i don't need to deal with that shit'
Nov 19, 2021 • 139 tweets • 23 min read
cw dubcon exhibitionism a/b/o
omega lwj, hostage of the wen sect, is dragged to a banquet and offered up for the use and pleasure of wen ruohan's favourite ally: the yiling patriarch.
cw feared noncon
no one has touched lan wangji since he was taken hostage, but he knew with grim certainty that it was inevitable. either one of the wen sons would take him as a concubine, or he'd be handed off to win someone's favour.
now he has his answer.
Nov 15, 2021 • 44 tweets • 8 min read
little lan wangji is kneeling outside of his mother's house. it is snowing and the sky is dark. his golden core is strong for his age, but his fingers, his nose, are cold. he crept out of bed to come here, and he is so tired. but he won't move until his mother opens the door.
birds are flitting overhead. the snow falls serenely, settling on his shoulders. there are no lanterns lit in his mother's home, no fire. she must be so cold. colder even than lan wangji is.
his eyes must close for a second, but they open abruptly when he hears footsteps.
Nov 3, 2021 • 14 tweets • 3 min read
madame lan manages to escape with her younger son. she can only do so because she has a gift: she can turn into a rabbit. her little lan zhan is just like her. she coaxes him into transforming, promising she'll show him how to turn back when they're safe.
that day never comes.
wei ying is an orphan living in yiling, searching for scraps of food when he finds a tiny bunny hiding behind the inn. the bunny is shivering, obviously terrified, and so small. when wei ying sees it, he can't help but yelp - and the bunny looks at him and THUMPS
