Àgbà John Doe Profile picture
Man, Husband, Father, Uncle. C-in-C of Àgbàfians. Reality-based. The truth hurts & heals. Insults=Block. Patriarchy FC Flag Bearer. DMs to @jon_d_doee End.
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Apr 14 11 tweets 3 min read
"A blind husband is a good husband".

Some of you keep asking me what I mean by this.

I did not say that you should be deliberately blind to what is obviously visible.

What it means is that a woman will continue to treat you as a king until you discover her secrets.

Please take your minds back to all the DMs from married men that caught their cheating wives.

The narratives are very similar.

Their wives become defensive, then they start to look for ways to manipulate them.

And then they become violent & dangerous.

She knows that you will no
Apr 9 8 tweets 2 min read
If the wife is a full time housewife.

He does those things that a masculine in nature, around the house.

He is not supposed to cook, clean, do laundry or the dishes.

He can only do them, when his wife is sick or unavailable.

If he wants to cook, he can do it for the sake of Image creating memories for his kids, or he just feels like being "romantic" to his wife.

If the wife is a career/business wife, that goes out everyday like he does.

She takes out time during the weekends or off days, to do the cooking & cleaning.

Then if he returns before his wife,
Apr 6 4 tweets 3 min read
Please read the conversation that I had with a 40 year old married man.

Ensure that you read to the last screenshot 👇. Image
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Apr 5 14 tweets 3 min read
It's mostly because you young men of this generation drew far away from your fathers, & embraced the woke culture, that's why you're finding it hard to lead the women of your generation.

Your level of stupidity has emboldened them.

Now they're destroying themselves in the process.

Unable to prepare themselves to be good wife materials, & raise a family in the future, under a balanced & functional home.

It's not funny.

Everyday, I share DM stories of how men are dealt with by women in the most embarrassing manner.

Each time I read those DMs,
Apr 3 4 tweets 2 min read
You have lost your wife.

You cannot get her back, and I do not advice that you do that.

Unfortunately, you lost your child, but that in itself, will make you not to have long ties with her or her family.

Your mother as well, doesn't like her.

If her father and brother Image
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wanted your marriage to work, they would not have come to your place to take her away to go rent her a place to stay.

They would have asked her to come home, & wait for you to make amends.

But that obviously, is not the case.

And I dare say.. That she has stepped out.
Apr 3 5 tweets 2 min read
Just look at how this young man has been used as a retirement plan for a hoeing girlfriend.

A girl suddenly broke up with you for no reasons, went on to hoe around for 3+ years.

Then came back to you, & you accepted her back.

She even lied to you that she had dated just one Image
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man, but it turned out that it was 4.

The 4 is just the one that you know about, how about the rest?

And then she's begging you not to leave her.

And you're here making excuses for her that she has not cheated since you got back.

You're a very stupid man.

And she knows that
Mar 24 8 tweets 3 min read
I need you all to read this story to the last screenshot.

And hopefully, it'll open the eyes of young men.

First, let me thank you for the courage to tell this story without emotions or sentiments.

You're a man.

And I hope you would take my sincere advice.

And by extension, Image
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your nephew that you just introduced to my page.

When I keep telling young men to choose the mother of your intended wife, before you choose your wife, this is a typical example.

When I keep telling young men not to believe women's stories until you're convinced, this is a Image
Mar 13 14 tweets 4 min read
How women allow pastors to ruin their lives in the name of "I want my spiritual leader to check if the man is good for me".

Now you're 30, & you're now desperate, & at the mercy of men.

You destroyed 3 relationships in the past, because a pastor told you that the men were not Image
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your husbands.

You even stayed out of relationships for 3 years, in the name of waiting for the right man.

Now you just met another man, and a pastor is still telling you that he's not your husband.

Honestly, I would have ignored your DM because I don't want to say that it's
Mar 9 7 tweets 2 min read
I feel you.

Perhaps, you may have missed another thread that I wrote last week, about husbands not taking undue advantage of the kindness of their wives.

And that they should not feel entitled to their money too.

This is where I think your husband is missing it.

And it's also Image
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what some husbands may be going through too in their matrimony.

So as a husband, please do some self introspection on what this woman said, and you may just see why your wife is being secretive with her money.

To the woman in the DM.

Let me suggest something to you.

Wait for
Mar 8 12 tweets 3 min read
Let's discuss a little about the married man that I just shared his DM.

I always emphasize on 3 major pillars of marriage.

1) Kindness
2) Selflessness
3) Deliberate committment

I've never said that these 3 were a one-sided thing.

It's expected than the husband and the wife must hold on to these 3 pillars, for their marriage to last.

From the man's story, two things are obviously lacking.

Kindness and selflessness.

And I did tell him in my caption, that it's unfortunate that he married an unkind wife.

When you're selfless in marriage, you'll
Mar 4 8 tweets 6 min read
Please read the conversation that I had with a 27 year old married woman.

Ensure that you read to the last screenshot 👇. Image
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Mar 4 5 tweets 2 min read
I believe you must have met her parents before now.

And that she has met yours.

If that's the case, tell your parents that you want to go see her parents.

And that this time, you want to go & tell them that you want to marry their daughter.

And that if they grant it, you'll Image Like to visit another time, with your family member(s).

Her father will tell you when it'll be convenient for him to receive you again.

You'll have to do the same for your girlfriend.

She'll have to visit your parents, and this time, you're formally introducing her as the
Mar 2 13 tweets 3 min read
For the umpteenth time, let me repeat a few things to young men.

1) you do not meet a lady, and you attempt to coerce her to date you by telling her that you are dating her for marriage.

If you do this, you're already losing before starting.

2) you do not go for any lady that is obviously way ahead of you in age, social class, education or financial status.

A man is supposed to be ahead of his woman in almost everything.

3) you do not see a lady in financial distress, and you take pity on her, then you start to take up her financial burden.
Feb 27 14 tweets 3 min read
And this is why I always emphasize on men leading their wives right.

Tables can turn in marriage.

If you lead your wife right, she'll always portray you as the provider.

Even if she has more money than you do.

How does it start?

It starts from when you're in a relationship. I have said many times, that for those of you in relationship, your girlfriend is not supposed to be the ones paying for dates.

And that if you do not have money, she should find ways to assist you without making it look like she's the one paying for the date.

She'll buy things
Feb 22 11 tweets 4 min read
When I tell young men to treat women how they ought to be treated and not how they wish to be treated, some of you do not get it.

Please read this DM from a married man of 6 years.

This is a man that has been solely responsible for his family of two children.

It's easy for Image
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anyone to estimate the ages of their children.

The eldest should not be more than 5, and the youngest is under 5.

Tell me...

How can a mother of two children, whose husband has been providing for them, say that she's depressed?

I know that we have clinical depression, but is Image
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Feb 18 6 tweets 3 min read
It was just last night that I said women who date men that have been damaged will literally be walking on egg shells.

Please read this DM.

Young lady, I do not think that your parents refusal to consent to his marrying you, is all about his financial capacity.

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more for your safety and well-being.

Recall that they has initially consented but changed their minds after your elder sister & her husband revealed to them, what you're experiencing in the relationship.

If I were your father, I'll also refuse to consent to his request. Image
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Feb 17 7 tweets 3 min read
Women.

If I tell you that there is nothing wrong with your husband, you'll not agree.

That "I love you" that you're craving for, you go wait tire ooo.

I hardly tell my wife that I love her, but I tell my kids that everyday, & at anytime.

But your husband loves you. Image
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I understand that you want to be hearing it eveeytime, but sorry, you will not.

And I don't want you to start over thinking anything.

If you continue to make a mountain out of a mole hill, you'll irritate your husband.

His focus is to be there for you and his kids, & show you
Feb 13 9 tweets 3 min read
First, you need to be grateful to God that she left you.

Not because she's necessarily a bad person, but because she doesn't want to ruin you.

Everything about you to me, and to her, reaks of weakness in masculinity, which she knows too well.

And no woman who wishes to be Image
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married to a masculine man, will want you.

It's only women who want their husbands to be mumus that will accept to marry you.

Women do not love men.

Any woman that is telling you that she loves her husband, means something entirely different from the love that a man gives or
Feb 9 13 tweets 3 min read
When it comes to finances.

You as a woman, must be very careful with how you use it to uplift/help your man.

It's never in a woman's place, to be financially responsible for her man.

It's in her place to be financially accountable to him.

If you throw your money to his face carelessly, he'll resent you & may even take your money.

Depending on his level of greed or entitlement.

If you're married, even if you want to take up some of his responsibilities, you must seek for his consent before you do that.

You as a wife, must not pay the school
Jan 11 13 tweets 3 min read
No, it's not a crime but it's a problem.

So let me say this to you, & to single ladies like you.

If you're in your teens or early 20s, telling a man that you're a virgin & you do not want sex before marriage could be understandable.

But when are approaching 30, it becomes a Image
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problem.

You have described yourself first, by saying that you have a car and you're comfortable taking care of yourself.

It's a good thing, but men who know what they're looking for in a wife, are not easily carried away by those things.

If at your age, the first things that
Jan 9 13 tweets 3 min read
So that is what I think a lot of young married people lack.

1) patience
2) tolerance
3) discernment

I've always told us that the first 5 years of your marriage will be very challenging for most married people.

I've also shared a few screenshots between my wife and I from about 8 years ago.

If a newly married man or woman shares a DM with me, & shares similar screenshots from his wife or her husband, & I advice him or her to be patient.

Some of you will come to the comments section to scream...

"This marriage is toxic!"

"You married a beast!"