my therapist commented recently that I was very resilient, which is true, but always makes me sad. I would rather live a life that required less resiliency.
a black person on here tweeted something once about how it is a mistake to see resiliency as something to be proud of, that being able to withstand more suffering & hardship should be a condemnation of our world instead of a compliment to an individual. I think about it often.
the fact that I survived my hardships while another person did not survive theirs does not make me better or stronger than them. it is not a compliment. it is a condemnation of the world we live in, that asks so many of us to endure so much.
I’m not from nyc (though I was born here), but I think part of what feels so dismissive about transplants saying “new york is dead” is that they’re revealing that the only reason they’re here is to consume, and not to give in return. they’re literally parasites.
they’re choosing to ignore that new york, like any city, is a living & breathing place with its own histories & neighborhoods & millions of people who call it home. if you’re living here entirely to consume, it’s worth thinking about how you interact with places more generally.
the act of making a place your home is inherently a two sided relationship. you are getting to benefit from the riches of the history & people who have built this city/town, and in return you should be thinking about what you’re giving back to the place itself.