Lagos is filled with vibes. This morning choke.

The danfo i entered from Ketu to Fadeyi na elele. We didn't have issues on the road until we got to Onipanu bus stop. The driver parked at the original designated bus stop which is far away from where buses drop people usually... His reason is that he doesn't want problems with LASTMA under Onipanu pedestrian bridge. He told everyone that after that place, it's until we get to Fadeyi ooo.

The people alighting at Onipanu started dragging with the conductor. Insults were flying around laaro kutukutu Monday

Uber and Bolt driving businesses are nice business to venture into but make sure you OWN your car.

If you are faithful on the App and not converting online passengers to offline, you will make an average of 20k daily driving for 10 hours.

Driving is not easy, let's say you rest for 2 days in the week. That leaves you 5 working days of 50 hours.

If you don't own the car, the average payment you pay car owner is 30k weekly. Payment is on Sunday.

Making an average of 100k - 30k = 70k.

Deduct 25% App fee from 100k is 25k.

70k - 25k = 45k.

Around 2013, my then boss looked at me sitting in the office and asked "can you drive". Wahala ti de bayi o.

I first thought if i say "No", mo ti gba sack niyen but as an IT student, what does he expect. I said the No faintly waiting for him to reply... He said "You can't drive at your big age? Go and learn driving o, you can be given car at anytime to drive"

That statement sounded like promotion in my ears. They will me car? Emi IT student lasan lasan.

On a second thought, none of the full staff get car. Won gbemi l'handicap.

A team of nine professors gathered to judge a student who was wrongly accused.
He proved his case and everyone in the court room knew he wasn't the offender. The offender even owned up to the offence.
At the end of the day, eight of the professors said...

https://twitter.com/metrowatchng/status/1634902457091325955

he's guilty while 1 professor said he isn't but no one knew who the 8 are. No one knew who is the lone professor who stood for justice. They declared under hidden identities against the accepted practice and that judgement went down as the most terrible judgement in the school.

Thank God i didn't die in year 2000.

Just like every other December Holiday, my mum took us to our hometown, Odogbolu.

Coming together to meet cousins, aunties, uncles and friends was beautiful.

A day to December 25, we we beside the house playing when man... looking tattered, carrying a log of wood and one heavy cutlass passed our side.

One of my cousins who actually lives in the town and knows everybody whispered to us that we should all shout "Boda Kola"

We asked, what will happen? He said nothing.

The awa elenugboro shouted...

One thing that baffles me everyday in the lives of Christians is the way they dress.

Any dress you can't wear to church, you should never wear it for other outings.

A dress that is too revealing for church is also too revealing for owanbe. You can't choose when to be modest... Except the wear is a special wear like beach wear, casual errand wears, bedroom wears etc.

"This gown is too short for church" is also too short for parties and outings. God is everywhere. What are you trying to do? You selective Christian.

You are not only a Christian when...

Just like every other JAMB, i collected that JAMB fee in 2009 from my dad as usual but squandered it. I think it was 4k or so.

I know as a hardworking guy, i will get it back. Do labourer or carpentry work for 4 days, owo ma sare pe pada but as time goes on, owo yen o pe... JAMB was getting close and to my family members, i have bought form. Erekere 🙆‍♀️

The only person who knows is my older brother. He too was looking for money for me. Common 4k is now hard to get for Obalola. Emi Badoo Scorpion. How?

As soon as i saw that the time was drawing...

Today was something else on the water. I was running late for a meeting so i decided to follow Ebute Ikorodu to VI for the first time on water.
Rushed into the ticketing space and was met with "One tasan faif ni ferry o", something that was 1200 days ago. Eko.

Oya, let's sha go. We set sail, one of the most beautiful journey. The captain was fast and energetic. In my head, i was like "omo yi sha pra pra"

Bruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhm. We were moving smoothly until i checked time and found out that we were running late. This is a journey of 25minutes. Ki lode?

This life, just focus on yourself.

Young and naive, i entered FUTA. As a hundred level student, that was my first time experiencing freedom. No one to say "wake up", no one to say "go and sleep".

Freedom on a platter, mio ri iru e ri. As omo boy, i was chopping it... In my room, we were about 4 hundred level students but i didn't make friends with them like that, i chose a 300 level student beside my room as friend. There's this level of class expected between a 300 level student and a 100 level but this guy showed me love. Ife yii ga oo

I boarded a Danfo today and was amazed at how the conductor was showing courtesy as against the norm in Lagos. Shebi gbogbo oni danfo lo ya werey but why are these ones telling us "Ketu Tipper la ma ti turn pada o, a o ni de Ketu tan o"

Normally, they don't tell people... They just park at Ketu Tipper and shout "oya, gbogbo ero" without getting to Ketu bus stop.

Seated beside the driver in front, I was like "Egbon ki lon shele". Deep down, I just want to know the cause of the courtesy.

Yesterday wasn't funny at VI.

I have vowed not to enter ferry again from VI to Ikorodu till next year but due to a very long meeting, i was still at VI around 6pm. I can't struggle for bus. Emi big boy. Lailai

"Ferry, here I come"...... Getting close to the jetty at Sandfill, I noticed they were about locking the gate, i ran like a thief doing intern. It wasn't easy.

Moving close to the loading point, i started hearing noises. What's happening? Fight

Kiloshele?

I noticed about 30 people dragging the...

My Journey to Abuja. Oju mi ri.

Flight ticket for roundtrip Abuja - Lagos was around 120k. Owo London Used PS4, God forbid.

I quickly checked God is Good Motors and saw 21k to Abuja. Whaaaat? Abuja nile nle nibeyen?

Checking through other options, i finally settled for Cross.. Country. A reputable company I think. Let's go there. I booked online but when I got to their Jibowu Office, I was asked to complete the transaction at their head office in Yaba or I can just buy a hardcopy ticket there once and for all. Perfect. "Take 13k, give me my ticket"

So i entered trenches boat again today from VI to Ikorodu. God, God God, Haaa. I fear God today.

Before we left VI, we all noticed the boat wasn't good but the werey captain wanted to manage it. How dare you manage boat on water? Is it danfo? E ma gba mi ke It took him several minutes to start the boat and all our complains fell on deaf ears. "Alaye, transfer us into another one since we are still at VI". Iro nio, bobo no hear.

He eventually started and set sail. Na so boat stop, no start again in the middle of water. Akoshibero.

I was in Primary 4 when my bro was in Primary 6 in the trenches. That Tuesday morning, we left home for school without carrying our lunch because it wasn't ready yet. Mumcy promised to bring it to school around 12 since our school wasn't far.

12 knack, food no show. Ewweeee 🙆‍♀️🙆‍♀️ 1pm, 2pm, hunger nearly killed the children of God. My brother and I left school in anger after closing like "ti a ba dele mehn, a ma lo para fun mummy ni"

We were paraing like "ha, mummy, iya ma je wa o" when mummy para'd back that she brought the food to school. Whaaat?

Everytime i remember the story of Jonah, i remember how we don't emphasize on that story enough.

God saw it's time to send words to the people of Nineveh to repent and so He sent Jonah the son of Amittai. Jonah got this information, packed his bag and ran away... He boarded a ship going to Tarshish so he can hide himself from God, the All-seeing.

Jonah didn't board a Uber ship where he can be all by himself. He didn't charter boat. He boarded a ship that was conveying businessmen with their wares in Millions....

This Alpha male thing is funny. We are now in a generation where men wants to be seen as men, respected as men but don't want to carry women's responsibilities. It can't work.

Whether you are married or not, so far you are in a relationship, you must either choose equality... or be fully ready to take responsibilities as a man. You can't have the two.

You want your girlfriend to be submissive to you, be good cook and at the same time, you don't want her to be asking for money from you. It can't work.

Those responsibilities you are carrying...

Guys please, i need help. I need advice

A very good friend of mine squatted with me from 2018 till August 2021. He was unemployed most of the times which i didn't have issues with... Fast forward to late 2020 immediately after the lockdown, we both started looking for a Job for him but he didn't get any. All efforts proved abortive but we move. One time, he even stopped trying but I didn't give up because feeding a grown man is actually tough...

Why i said Lawyers are one of the reasons for high rent in Lagos!

Firstly, they are not Real Estate professionals, they are lawyers. In the real estate world, they are quacks just like the uneducated street agents.

A Laboratory Scientist can't treat a patient even though... he carries out test on patients. That's not his job, he will do it wrongly.

Same as lawyers practicing agency and property management, they are doing it all wrong.

Property management is not just bringing in tenants and collecting rent/agreement...

Imagine being tech savvy.

Imagine actually knowing IT and good at IT.

Imagine you are one of the best at IT.

Imagine living and being an IT professional in Canada.

E go choke abi e no go choke? Answer me, don't be rude... Do you plan to be an IT Professional? It can be taken care of.

Are you planning to relocate to Canada and you need extra CRS Points? It can be taken care of... by who?

By BCS, the Chartered Institute for IT.

Where you can carve a niche for yourself in this digital age.

So i went to the bank in Ikorodu this afternoon to make a transfer and on getting there, i met a huge crowd outside waiting for their turn to go in. I joined in waiting and immediately it was my turn, a woman from nowhere jumped queue and was rushing to enter... The security officer blocked her way and she pushed him back but the man quickly used the door to block her, then the drama ensued. "Do you know who i am" "you are a stupid man" "you are crazy, a fool, do you know who you are blocking, you wanted to wound me abi...

So I was robbed inside Danfo on Monday!!!

A very terrible experience that left me hanging. This past week has been something else and you guys have to be careful out there. So I boarded the bus at Ketu interchange heading for Berger on that Expressway. The front door was opened and a well dressed guy came down for me to enter and sit close to the driver before entering back.