I’m a comedy writer and a teacher depending on the outfit and what snacks are involved. My tweets do not reflect the opinions of Punky Brewster.
Dec 30, 2021 • 6 tweets • 2 min read
10 lessons I’ve learned in 2021:
1. No response is a response. If it’s not a yes, then it’s a no. If you have to always take the initiative or if most of your texts go unanswered or you feel like you’re basically begging someone to hang out with you….they’ve already told
you how they feel about you. 2. Step ladders are unnecessary when putting up Halloween decorations because falling off ladders hurts and no one gives a shit how spooky your porch looks. 3. Listen to the words of a drunk. If someone verbally attacks you while drunk, that’s how
Oct 14, 2021 • 6 tweets • 1 min read
Things that we don’t need opposing views on:
1. Holocaust 2. Slavery 3. Japanese Internment Camps 4. Armenian Genocide 5. 9/11 6. Pearl Harbor
Let’s just assume that as a society there are certain tragedies we don’t need opposing views on. Do you really wanna be THAT person?
I was reminded of another one:
6. Sandy Hook
Although if you have an opposing view to the slaughtering of six year olds, please let us know so we can contact the authorities
Jan 19, 2021 • 19 tweets • 4 min read
As we count down, let’s remember Trump’s greatest moments as President:
1. That time he saved the lives of a million imaginary friends during the Bowling Green Massacre
2. When he fought so hard to find a cure for Windmill Cancer, a deadly disease that kills 0 Americans a year
3. When he learned about a deadly virus eventually named COVID back in January 2020 and decided to blatantly ignore it, telling people it would just disappear and making fun of people for taking it seriously. 400,000 people dead as of today.
4. Refused to condemn white supremacy
Apr 17, 2020 • 5 tweets • 1 min read
Dr. Phil has a doctorate in psychology.He is not a virologist.
Dr. Drew is a licensed internist&an addiction medicine specialist.Also, he is not a virologist.
Dr. Oz is a licensed cardiothoracic surgeon. He is also not a virologist.
Dr. Pepper is a tasty soda& not a virologist
So I guess this took off....so here’s my SoundCloud
