Michael Ian Black Profile picture
9 years in the NFL. 2 rings. #9years2rings
5 subscribers
Nov 29, 2022 8 tweets 2 min read
The reason Milo and Nick Fuentes are hanging out with Ye is they - correctly - see him as the most important tool they've ever had at their disposal (plus the fact that Milo is an attention-seeking whore). And the reason Ye's garbled message is effective isn't because of *what* he's saying but because he's traveling in the caravan of the "just asking questions" crowd, which holds so much appeal for authority-questioning young white men...
Nov 12, 2022 20 tweets 2 min read
Arrived at Mar-A-Lago late last night for Tiffany's wedding. Excited for the festivities but nervous that my giant placard that says "You should all be in jail" will draw unwanted attention. To be fair, it was a last-minute invite, and all my other placards are in the wash. Some additional early drama at Tiffany’s wedding: apparently Tiffany isn’t on the guest list.
Jul 5, 2022 12 tweets 2 min read
I think it's a great question. I'm not a biologist or a gender theorist or a logician but I can try... ? My answer will be the same, I imagine, if I were to try to answer the question, "What is a man". I don't think the question you're asking is actually, "What is a woman," because I could simply say "A woman is a human being," since all women are human beings but not all human beings are women.
May 11, 2022 7 tweets 1 min read
It needs to be said: everything at Dunkin Donuts only tastes about 80% as good as I want it to taste. Not interested in @joshgondelman’s opinion on this.
Oct 28, 2021 18 tweets 3 min read
Mort Sahl, 94, died yesterday. Nightclub comic, social satirist, and, if his 1969 interview with Dick Cavett was any indication, a smug and self-satisfied shithead. Judge for yourself. Now, this one only one appearance in a long career. May not have been his finest moment describing women as incapable of intellectualism and accusing homosexuals of forming a nefarious conspiracy. Perhaps his views, as they say, evolved.
May 28, 2021 6 tweets 2 min read
Feels great to read this. Great to learn the guy was undermining from the beginning.
Feb 27, 2021 4 tweets 1 min read
In 3 MINUTES, I will REVEAL how many SLICES OF PIZZA I ate last night! The answer will CHANGE EVERYTHING! 3 slices... but! In less than 3 minutes I will REVEAL a SHOCKING TWIST!
Nov 2, 2020 14 tweets 3 min read
MY OFFICIAL PRESIDENTIAL ENDORSEMENT THREAD!

As some of you know it’s been VERY difficult for me to make up my mind about whom to support this presidential election because, with Joe Biden and Donald Trump, you've got two GREAT candidates. On the one hand, you’ve got Joe Biden, a former senator and vice president who has lived his life of public service with dignity and humility. On the other, you’ve got Donald Trump, a bankrupt racist who ran a fake university. So it’s tough.
Sep 22, 2020 7 tweets 2 min read
Bummed that one half of our political system doesn't even pretend to care about what's right anymore and that the other half is forced to consider abandoning their own principles to fight them. Sucks when political immorality carries no penalty. In fact, it's rewarded. Further bummed at the erosion of my faith in the American political system. I partially blame my own previous naivety, but I also think the last few years finally broke America. We're broken. It doesn't mean we can't be repaired, although maybe that's my naivety still piping up.
Aug 24, 2020 4 tweets 1 min read
FINAL SET OF FINALISTS FOR NEW SEASON OF OBSCURE: This poll will determine the winner. My God, the excitement. #obscure Frankenstein
Aug 2, 2020 4 tweets 1 min read
I don't know why interviewers don't ask a question, and if they guest refuses to answer, end the interview. "Will you accept foreign help" "That's a silly question." "Yes or no." "That's a silly question." "Thank you for your time today." They're on your show because they want publicity and attention. Don't give it to them if they refuse to answer. Doesn't seem hard to me.
Jul 20, 2020 7 tweets 1 min read
Anti-Semitism is "enigmatic" now. Cool, cool/ washingtonpost.com/business/2020/… "Mel Gibson's enigmatic remarks about the Holocaust..."
Jul 11, 2020 8 tweets 2 min read
On the heels of the Blake Neff/Tucker Carlson news, I've been telling you for years that Stephen Miller is a white supremacist and that he was, in fact, flashing a white power symbol in the White House. Stephen Miller is a white supremacist, has been since high school, and is a Jeff Sessions/Steve Bannon protege. He was friends with Richard Spencer at Duke. Renounced white supremacist/former Breitbart editor Katie McHugh, who knows him, says the same. cnn.com/2019/12/13/pol…
Jul 9, 2020 4 tweets 1 min read
I sincerely hope that the GOP is utterly destroyed this fall but that, afterwards, a new party rises which figures out a way to disentangle conservatism from studied ignorance, greed above all, and the blunt weapon of white grievance. Whatever that new party is, and whoever leads it, needs to denounce Trump and Trumpism and kick former Trumpers right the hell to the curb forever. To be clear, I don't think this will happen but it needs to.
Jul 5, 2020 6 tweets 1 min read
This American life. I'm just so sick of this. So, so, so sick of it. The Republican party's reaction to coronavirus is EXACTLY the same as their reaction to gun violence. Ignore, deflect, distract, and lie. This party is an American obscenity.
Jul 4, 2020 9 tweets 2 min read
Yesterday I tweeted about calling a new constitutional convention to begin the process of rebuilding America when this administration ends. The way I see it, it would be a multi-year process encouraging great debates from our best minds from every walk of life... Historians, political scientists, activists, economists, conservatives and liberals, artists and writers, philosophers and lawyers. Religious and irreligious. A project designed to dig into the foundation of who we are and to re-examine it from the broad perspective of history
Jul 4, 2020 4 tweets 1 min read
When this nightmare administration ends and we’re looking around at the vast destruction wondering where to go and how to begin to heal,
I suggest we call a Constitutional Convention. It could be amazing... A multi-year project in which we call forth our best minds to re-examine and reassess, and reaffirm our best founding principles and do away with the worst.
Jun 20, 2020 4 tweets 1 min read
If he played an Ewok badly then, yes, I would speak out. As it is, though, I don’t know what to say. We see horrific behavior from men time and time again. Chris D’elia is added to a long list. There will certainly be more. I think comedy can be a cesspool of bad behavior for all the obvious reasons. One of the ways to make it change is to do what we’re doing: speak out, call out bad behavior, treat the comedy environment as a work environment. Don’t be an asshole.
Jun 8, 2020 6 tweets 2 min read
Thinking about Mitt Romney this morning and whether Dem treatment of him was fair in 2012? I think Mitt is a fundamentally decent guy but he was portrayed as a rapacious business executive who would treat the the American people like cells on an Excel spreadsheet. Was it fair? I think it was. The problem with Mitt is a lot like the problem with "the good cop" narrative. The modern GOP has become such a festering blister that I don't know if it's possible to be a competent, moderate, technocratic Republican president.
May 28, 2020 13 tweets 2 min read
Last night, I mentioned that the George Floyd police murder relates to deep problems with masculinity. American racism and traditional masculinity are hopelessly entwined. When I was writing my new book about boys and men, I really wanted to avoid the topic of race altogether because I wanted to make it about *one* thing, how to give advice to my son (and myself) about becoming a better man.
Apr 13, 2020 8 tweets 2 min read
Now ask yourself what would have happened if Trump hadn't spent the last three years lying, smearing, gaslighting. If he then had said, on 2/15: the science tell us a pandemic is coming and I believe the science... Standing beside me is Speaker Pelosi and Dr. Fauci, who will explain to you the threat, and why we all believe a national lockdown is necessary. We've also been listening to the National Global Pandemic Response Team, which I kept intact.