Oliver Willis Profile picture
Senior Writer @AmerIndependent. Prev @mmfa. Get news daily at https://t.co/q7JMFdCl9l
Mme. L. Profile picture Bill Jackson III 🖥 🦅🌊🗽 🇺🇸 ✊🏽🌊 Profile picture 🌈Madame DeFarge🏳️‍🌈 (she/her) Profile picture Giuliani's shriveled khram 🌊 Profile picture eDo Profile picture 80 added to My Authors
25 Nov
in christmas of 1986 i received the nintendo entertainment system from my parents. i was 9 years old. i have spent the following 3 and a half decades in search of the absolute joy of that singular moment.

full peace. understanding. the nes gamepad.
just look at it. a simple box. which contained all joy in the known universe. Image
i can only speak for myself, but yes, it had to be the one with the robot. i dont know how it worked out for kids who didnt get the robot. but my bliss was the robot.
Read 4 tweets
25 Nov
ted the main thing i want you to be thankful for this holiday season is that still, despite your ranting and raving in the halls of congress, space pirates are STILL not real.

-> americanindependent.com/ted-cruz-trump…
"Defense officials have said there will be a need for a unified space command to coordinate space-based military activities, but not to fight space piracy.

Because space pirates are not real." americanindependent.com/ted-cruz-trump…
i also wrote a follow-up:

"No matter how much Cruz protests or cites Chinese weapons that can destroy satellites (America has those too), it won't make space pirates real. Because they aren't."

americanindependent.com/ted-cruz-whine…
Read 4 tweets
25 Nov
What some factions of the left and most of the right never seem to want to grapple with is that Barack Obama was and is an enormously popular political figure, and always reflexively trying to tear that down isn’t going to work.
If it were me, I would think, “What is it people like about Obama and how could we use elements of that to implement good things?” But ah, that would mean admitting that the way I’m currently approaching things isn’t working at all, and we can’t do that.
Like, “oh I like Medicare for All and/or the Green New Deal. How would the guy who was elected to two presidential terms and still remains quite loved half a decade out of office convince others to support those ideas?” But no, let’s just keep having brute force fights instead!
Read 7 tweets
25 Nov
A year ago today/this week I was in the hospital. Ultimately I ended up with a second toe amputation for the second time in a year (I swear to God you barely miss it). This year despite everything going on I’m thankful not to be there again. I mean, look at this food. Image
I’m especially thankful for my Aunt Angela, who came down again (she did it the year before) to help take care of me while I was hobbling around on one foot. She’s my mom’s youngest sister, and she’s been there for me literally since the day I was born (she was in the room). ImageImage
When I was in the hospital I explained my priorities to them. ImageImage
Read 7 tweets
25 Nov
also for about 10 mill i could probably program the most amazing lib news network on youtube.
i need a billionaire liberal benefactor
you would be like "what... what is this? its making me want a social safety net and making me very angry at republicans... and im not bored and nobody said anything about reading whitepapers"
Read 6 tweets
25 Nov
Liberals are gonna spend ten years and a day agonizing over social media content and coming up with unworkable solutions when the answer is simple: Blast people with info from the left as loud as they get info from the right. That’s it.
Lol people in my replies over-complicating this. I don’t know why this is difficult. See what Fox and the Ny Post do? Do that. But with liberal stuff.
Maybe I just see this different cause I spent so many years in right wing media world. Liberals spend so much time over thinking this and needlessly pleading with the party to do this. I’m not saying it’s a magic bullet but it needs to be done and it isn’t particularly hard.
Read 9 tweets
24 Nov
biden gonna announce corn pop as secdef, consensus pick for party's center-left and progressive wings
"Corn Pop will shake up the foreign policy consensus, but will attack the key threats to America and our allies through strong, but forceful multilateral action. Its the choice that unites the party."
"Troops hail selection of Corn Pop as Secdef."
"Former Secretaries of Defense praise Corn Pop pick"
Read 5 tweets
24 Nov
the neocontrarians are becoming like the larouche wing of the left
pretty soon their desire to take the contrary, unpopular position on every topic under the sun, absent all logic, is going to end up with them being nazis.

"many people are so insistent that its taboo to say some races are superior, but i am very edgy!"
theyre gonna launch phrenology substacks with bari weiss and andrew sullivan. "bumps on the head are real science, the woke journals dont want to publish the truth!"
Read 5 tweets
23 Nov
i would advise going through at least one (or more) election cycles where you have no strong preference in a primary and you get to see just how much emotion gets wrapped up into things, for better or worse. (im not immune, i def got there in 2008)
me in the 2008 primaries vs me in the 2020 primaries
me in 2008 every time something negative went against obama
Read 5 tweets
23 Nov
wonder how many libs would just eat up outrageously hagiographic biden propaganda?

Grain Production Rises To Unprecedented Levels Under President Biden

Biden-Era Fertility Rates Break Record For Third Year

Servers Melt As Billions Worldwide Stream Latest Biden Speech
who can produce some soviet-style biden propaganda pics for me? lol
"President Biden Has Provided Our Children With Ice Cream And Glorious Vaccines!"
Read 6 tweets
23 Nov
we'll find out more about biden's cabinet picks but just a reminder that trump's secretaries of state were the head of exxon and a conspiracy theory congressman.
as ive said previously, historically biden has been (somewhat) to my right on foreign policy and defense, though im probably closer in mindset to him than i am the liberal activist group, on those topics.
on the other hand we should get the hell out of afghanistan and its one of the few policies of trump's ill support.
Read 6 tweets
20 Nov
I went into a coma around 1984ish and all of life since then exists in my imagination. (Seriously it took me a long time as a kid to just go along with all of you existing in my dreamscape)
One conspiracy I truly will believe until I die is that they replaced my 4th grade teacher with another woman and everyone kept pretending she was the original. My friends and I even tested it out by yelling the first teachers name at her.

And she turned around.

True story.
I don’t know why my mom went along with this ruse. Probably some Illuminati stuff
Read 5 tweets
19 Nov
i have personally had it w birx and fauci
we're having prob the worst public health crisis in forever in america and the two of them just sit there like potted plants. smiling and waving. its insane.
its like an expert on fires standing in the middle of a four-alarm fire saying, "we're working on it," but not actually working on it.
Read 5 tweets
19 Nov
giuliani's hair dye is all over his face right now. im dying laughing.
its insane
look at that dye
Read 4 tweets
19 Nov
my early feel on the election truthers are kinda like the 9/11 truthers and the birthers. nothing will ever convince them. they'll go on for years saying it was stolen. there's millions of them but theyre crackpots and cranks and life is too short to give them facts they ignore.
theres people to this day who will tell you that no plane hit the pentagon. like the election totals for biden, we all saw it. nothing will convince them. there is no point to bothering.
"jet fuel can't melt steel beams" = "vote dumps can't beat trump's election night lead"

its the same shit in a different key.
Read 4 tweets
19 Nov
might just pivot to full maga-style biden tweeter. its not intellectually honest but its easier on my brain.
Biden got our jobs back. WE LOVE YOU PRESIDENT BIDEN! ⭐️⭐️⭐️🇺🇸🇺🇸
HE FIGHTS SO HARD FOR US. RELENTLESS!! #BIDENSTRONG
Read 4 tweets
18 Nov
my "affirmation of love" fogs up my glasses
sometimes i need sen booker to take it down about 20 notches
me: ok, going in here, let me grab this mask...

booker: QUICKLY, EVERYONE, GRAB YOUR LOVE AFFIRMATIONS

damn, cory, settle down.
Read 4 tweets
17 Nov
my dog understands counting all the votes in an election. maybe this dog is just stupid.
"count all the votes. republicans delayed counting mail-in ballots that were heavily biden. this is not hard. more treats please."
frankly my dog came up with a polling aggregation model that knew the polls were off, we just didn't publicize it before the election. soon launching 538pup dot com.

tfw you are totally owning nate silver:
Read 4 tweets
17 Nov
many days i vacillate between wanting to fix all the things and just shrugging. people, esp on the left, largely don't want to tackle the key areas we have problems (the media). and there's only so much you can do.
we see stories like the biden campaign being swamped by right-wing noise and everyone's reaction is like: fact checks! subscribe to the ny times!

are you fucking kidding me?
the answer is simple: create noise from the left. but people largely don't want to do that. so here we are, a dinghy in an ocean of shit.
Read 5 tweets
15 Nov
"I hear what you're saying, but its undeniable some people just think owning blacks is a God-given right. What are you doing to address their concerns?" - Civil War Chuck Todd
"Is there some sort of compromise bill that could make everyone happy? Maybe only free some of the slaves? It might improve Lincoln's standing with southern plantation owners." - Civil War Chuck Todd
"What can be done to cool things down after the divisive backlash to the Emancipation Proclamation? Some have said it was partisan overreach by President Lincoln." - Civil War Chuck Todd
Read 9 tweets
15 Nov
somebody just randomly give me a book deal plz. thanks.
im not fussy about genre. at this point i could do nonfiction, spy story, fantasy, or sci fi. or all of the above.
but feel free to offer me that deal. it doesn't even have to be like obama or stephen king money.
Read 4 tweets