writer | she/her | design + brand enthusiast | feminism + human rights | founding Member @feminist_co | (me@ozzyetomi.com) Views mine. 🐝
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May 20 • 6 tweets • 2 min read
I had an aunt who was coerced into quitting her career. Everyone told her she was lucky she had a husband who could provide and didnt want her to work and she was ruining her marriage cos they were fighting bitterly over it at the time (he wanted her home with the kids)
One time i went to visit and she was really upset, she told me she had planned a trip to Ghana for her best friend’s daughter’s graduation. The night before her husband had ‘changed his mind’ and cancelled the ticket. Mind you this guy is by all accounts a “good husband”.
Sep 5, 2022 • 5 tweets • 1 min read
Lagos nightlife caters exclusively to yahoo boys. There is almost nowhere left where you can walk up to the bar and just order a damn drink, its over inflated bottles or nothing.
Probably why the music in clubs has progressively gotten worse, cos the entire experience is built around one demographic
Jul 13, 2022 • 7 tweets • 2 min read
One thing I am consistently adjusting when it comes to the learning love languages discourse, is focusing less on how I want to be loved, and instead learning to recognize how a person is actually showing me love.
It's quite a quandry to insist that people show you love only in the manner that you want to receive it. It sets people up for failure because we are all made up of different experiences that shape what we know to be love.
Jan 10, 2022 • 6 tweets • 2 min read
Kids don’t even really love you like that, they need you and are dependent on you and most parents manipulate that because of their need to see themselves through their offspring. I have a lot of thoughts on child-parent love.. its a game of survival & ‘legacy’.
As kids grow older and need you less, depending on your relationship, they start to learn to love you for a diff reason than that initial childish love that they need to have to survive. Its why we see most ppl either love their parents less (or sometimes more).
Jun 1, 2021 • 6 tweets • 2 min read
I had a random memory the other day - when I was a child, I was coming down the stairs and I could hear my parents talking below. I don't remember the details but my siblings and I were in trouble for something. And my mom said "We will ask Ozzy, she always tells the truth".
That statement never left me. It's one of the few compliments I had ever heard from my mom (even though it wasn't given directly - and i was probably a snitch lmao) but since then I have always prided myself in telling the truth, no matter how difficult. In fact, I abhor lying.
May 10, 2021 • 4 tweets • 2 min read
Lmao i rem when I first moved back and I was seeing this guy, I was driving to hang with him and suddenly my car stops. I had kinda just started driving so i was so nervous. I was close to his so i text him saying my car had stopped, and he replied saying "o wow" & that was it 😂
Some street side guys had to call some roadside mechanic for me who helped me sort out whatever the issue was. Dude text me "are you still coming?" and I just drove my ass back home and that, as they say, was that.
Nov 23, 2020 • 4 tweets • 2 min read
Random memory: when we ran the #4Aces blog, there was a photo of us with champagne flutes in our hands at a party, and an Anon left a comment saying we’d always be “mimosa sipping spinsters”. What’s so insane to me is we were < 23 at the time yet were being “taunted” w/ marriage.
Anyway that was the name of our group chat for a long time. Shalla to all my mimosa sipping spinsters out there, must be code for living your best life. People on the internet are fucking nuts 🤣.
Nov 23, 2020 • 4 tweets • 1 min read
In Lagos, there aren't many one-way signs. Most streets is on a if-you-know-you-know basis. In addition, they change the rules of a street as they please, today its one-way, tomorrow its not.
In further addition, most government officials and police do not obey *any* driving laws.
Aug 31, 2020 • 4 tweets • 1 min read
The point of appropriation is adopting something and using it for something other than in the way its unintended to the culture or offensive to the culture.
Wearing a Sari at your Indian friends traditional Indian wedding ✅
Wearing a sari as a halloween costume ❌
Wearing a Jamaican flag and bantu knots to celebrate Jamaican carnival ✅
Wearing Jamaican flag and bantu knots to a costume party ❌
Jul 28, 2020 • 7 tweets • 4 min read
Whether we are participating in the B&W 'challenge', or critiquing its performativeness... We should educate ourselves on its origins. I curated this information from @ auturkishculturalclub and @Beelzeboobz on IG to piece together the story, which is sadly, all too familiar:
Jun 28, 2020 • 6 tweets • 1 min read
Oppressors want to define your oppression for you, in a way that is palatable to them, instead of believing when you tell them the ways in which they oppress you whether they (willingly) participate or not. I find this to also be the case between cis & queer folks.
It's the reason I have learned to listen & sit with it when queer people name their oppression because oppression is not always about direct participation and its not always in the ways we think it shows up. It's not up to you to set the parameters of LGBTQ+phobias.
