Tom Scocca Profile picture
This Twitter is about the Machines.
15 May
This is definitely the best way to browse regularly purchased groceries on @FreshDirect, truly an inspired UX decision to eliminate "list view" and "view all"
Has any website designer in this world ever used a fucking website?
This Twitter is about the Machines
Read 7 tweets
23 Apr
Now is your chance to own an honest-to-goodness NFT artwork made from various formerly possibly valuable items hmmweekly.substack.com/p/hmm-weekly-f…
Did you ever wish you could own some Gawker Media stock options? Now you can own them as an NFT! foundation.app/0x01cb73c1dc6d…
Read 6 tweets
19 Apr
Hoo boy Image
Is there a weed strain called "King Leopold"
The only thing that makes Andrew Sullivan madder than being called a racist is when he hears someone saying that you can't really sort human races by their genetic superiority and inferiority
Read 4 tweets
16 Apr
Big win for Stephen Miller, David Frum, and the rest of the successful white nationalist movement
Not such a big win for the Afghans who helped out the losing team in that branch of the Forever War
Enjoy your "optics," assholes
Read 5 tweets
6 Apr
Pure psychopath shit
You literally are the opposite of what MLB needs; your tastes are unpopular and, as you say, you're going die
Uh actually go back to talking about baseball, sorry
Read 5 tweets
5 Apr
Moxie Cola hasn't tweeted since New Year's Eve at the end of 2019
Also Coke owns Moxie now? Huh.
Wikipedia is contradicting my belief that Moxie counts as a "cola," as it makes no mention of kola nut content
Read 4 tweets
29 Mar
Who is using that as their working definition right now?
I feel like if you wanted to improve The Discourse, you would try to improve the discourse, and if you wanted to pump up today's Twitter fight by embracing a notorious dickhead's bogus excuse for his being a dickhead, you'd do that
I encourage everyone sharing my annoyance with Matt Yglesias to retire that thing where people call him "Matty"; it doesn't rise to his excessively high standard of what counts as "harassment" but it's pointlessly rude and there are so many real things to pick on him for
Read 4 tweets
11 Mar
Working on my big 2021 investor deck
You may laugh but you can’t have any unless a handful of people choose to let you buy them
Everything’s ironic until somebody shows up with the money
Read 4 tweets
4 Mar
LOL you're so lazy you didn't even check that there was already a racist organization called FAIR
They tacked on Andrew Sullivan after taking that screenshot I guess Image
Check out our new group, Voices Directed Against Racism Everywhere
Read 4 tweets
1 Mar
Love to read a thread well grounded in historical accuracy about the category of Journalism
One super valuable way to set up a structural complaint about something is by being as inaccurate and pejorative as you can be about people’s motives as they operate within the structure Image
I usually don't get defensive about my own Substack because it's fine to object to whatever nascent brand-building revolves around phrenologists and Cancel Culture grifters claiming it as their safe space, but this is just old-fashioned pious fake-professional gatekeeping
Read 4 tweets
25 Feb
Undercover officer frantically waving his badge in a shootout
Maybe Michael Powell could have avoided the confusion by describing his beat as "exposing left-wing excess" rather than "Free Speech & Intellectual Debate"
Anyway right-wingers interested in decoding what Michael Powell was or wasn't trying to do with the story should look at who among the central characters get to have their class status considered throughout the piece and who gets their class set aside in favor of their race
Read 6 tweets
17 Feb
Genuinely bleak that Tucker Carlson, whose mother abandoned him and his family as a child because she wasn’t into it, is choosing this particular angle for his Two Minutes Hate
Look we all know what’s really going on here with this decrepit powerful man and his cynical, loveless family relations, says Rupert Murdoch’s prime-time TV host
Incredibly, taken on its own terms, Tucker's argument here is that longtime spouses could not be genuinely loving and tender with one another if one of them were in mental decline
Read 4 tweets
13 Feb
Ooh! Is it "Making a show of trashing the roster so as not to be accountable for doing their job of finding talent and winning games until some indefinite future date"?
Aka "Perpetrating a naked fraud on gullible morons"?
Let's check in with Keith Law's capsules of Mike Elias' top 20 prospects as he "rebuilds" the Orioles...
Read 11 tweets
5 Feb
Looks like it’s time once again for a reminder that Larry Summers’ entire career is an unbroken string of failure and catastrophe
“This is a bad strategy for steering a country through a crisis” says the man who came up with the economic transition plan for post-Soviet Russia
“We have to spend money prudently” says the man who left a multibillion-dollar university unable to pay dining hall workers for the breakfast shift
Read 6 tweets
31 Jan
Facebook's new, sophisticated appeals system for content-removal decisions is telling people in Myanmar which ways of dehumanizing Muslims are acceptable, which should be helpful in the next round of Facebook-facilitated genocide there oversightboard.com/decision/FB-I2…
Don't see any genocidal red flags here, just a healthy Facebook user discussion about how the death of a toddler of a particular religious identity probably made the world a better place
Puttin' the "oversight" in "Oversight Board"
Read 4 tweets
24 Jan
Can't think of anything bad that happened to a Washington Post journalist in the past four years, certainly not like getting chopped to pieces on the orders of a dictator intimately allied with the president and his family
It's not as if the president inspired a supporter to mail pipe bombs to CNN or anything
Read 4 tweets
23 Jan
"You know your neighbors."
The least enigmatic life story possible
Josh Hawley’s most damning indictment of liberal meritocracy is not any of his dumb culture-war speeches, it’s all the people in his wake who are baffled that someone who got good grades could be a vicious bigot
Read 5 tweets
10 Jan
It's tempting to view Ross Douthat as a clown, because he IS a clown
But Douthat's "There Will Be No Trump Coup" column didn't just offer a totally false account of the danger Trump posed. It also wound itself around to a very genteel version of the same resentful persecution myth that led the mob to the Capitol.
Violent revanchism—whether in the post-Reconstruction South or 1930s Germany or in the Capitol halls on Wednesday—draws on the brutal mob justifying its brutality by claiming they're the ones being victimized and dominated by an unaccountable elite.
Read 5 tweets
18 Nov 20
How can a person possibly form this ridiculous thought privately, let alone express it where the public, which knows very well by now what kinds of things Donald Trump does and doesn’t do, can see it?
Who the fuck is history
History—in the sense of a recorded sequence of events available to be known and interpreted—says that Nixon’s pardon led directly to a series of ever more criminal presidencies, eventually bringing us Trump, with Nixon’s own henchmen actively supporting the new crimes!
Read 4 tweets
27 Oct 20
There is *no such thing* as "Big Tobacco"
Let me just look up "attempting to gain monopolistic power" using Google, which is the default search engine on my Apple iPhone, thanks to a multibillion-dollar access deal between two ostensible business rivals
You talk about Monsanto but I can go to the farmers' market and buy apple cider donuts from someone who is absolutely not Monsanto
Read 5 tweets