Thread by @RemakingManhood

THREAD: Men can live in a world of sexual harassment and violence against girls/women and not be impacted personally. This is privilege. When this is pointed out, we become uncomfortable, then annoyed. As if we are being victimized by not being allowed to go on ignoring it all /1

We men can live life untroubled by sexual harassment and violence against girls and women. All we have to do is one simple thing. Just ignore it. Don't take a stand against it. Stay on the sidelines.
Be good men, sure, just don’t rock the boat, just be quiet about it all. /2

Sure, maybe sometimes we have to give some angry women some pushback. You know, #NotAllMen and so on. We have to clarify, “I don’t rape.” But that’s just us making sure people know we’re good men. Then we can go back to ignoring this issue that we’re not personally creating. /3

But one nagging question remains. What kind of good man remains silent in the face of others' suffering? What kind of good man gets annoyed when girls and women challenge them to help? When a house is burning do we stand by and say “well, I didn’t set that fire?” /4

Fuck no, we don’t. We get a bucket and we fight the fire. Because some day our house may be on fire. It works the same way with sexual harassment/violence. Because some day a woman or girl we love may be the target of a predator. This fire is now. We are called to help NOW. /5

And guess what? Men, you cannot live life of privilege ignoring sexual violence against women. We aren’t actually immune. Women we know and love are already being harassed/assaulted. One in five women will be rape survivors. We are already standing in that burning house. Ours. /6

There will be no peace and no comfort for men until all of this ends. We don’t get to enjoy our comfortable lives until we insure others lives are equally safe and comfortable. Sorry to guilt you boys, but this is how morality actually works. No comfort while wickedness abides /7

Also. A culture that refuses to tolerate sexual harassment and violence against girls and women would also refuse to accept it against boys and men. Zero tolerance against sexual violence is a debt we owe future generations. Men, it's past time to make this happen. /8

And for the record, for men, the issue isn’t whether sexual assault will happen to a girl or woman we know. That’s not the reason to take action because it grants the possibility for inaction. “It hasn’t happened to a woman in my circle” becomes our excuse to remain silent. /9

For one thing, we don't know which women in our circles are survivors of rape. /10

We can pretty much assume all the women we know have been harassed, so in our hearts we know our inaction on speaking out is already suspect. But whether or not we know a survivor can't define the baseline moral imperative here otherwise it's back to self interest, again. /11

We must stand up for everyone, everywhere and speak out against sexual violence against any human being, man, woman, boy or girl, stranger or friend. That is the baseline moral imperative that will define a good person. We must all stop averting our eyes and take action. /12

For those would would like a version of this thread in article form, it is here: medium.com/@remakingmanho… /13

"First, see the culture. Then, change the culture."
Want to start a powerful conversation about masculinity with someone you care about? Give them a copy of The Little #Metoo Book for Men. amazon.com/Little-MeToo-B… /14