Thread by @TurnipMerchant

What an election! What a campaign!

By just 5 votes, a 0.1% margin, Harrison has gotten his majority and held on.

I personally didn’t believe the results when I first saw them. Point one percent? I thought for sure it was a meme.

One begins to wonder if victory at any cost, by five votes, nonetheless, was worth it.

And that 0.1% margin was hard to come by. It was so obvious that Harrison’s guys were running scared, moving heaven and earth to eke out even the most pathetic of victories.

Almost overnight the endorsements rolled in. Ball told his voters to fall behind Harrison. Almost every major LCMS social media figure endorsed Harrison, and almost all at once.

Even Ball’s core backers fell in line for Harrison before Ball did.

Everyone also suddenly started referring to him as “Dr. Harrison.” Clearly there were worries that Harrison’s lack of credentials when compared to his rival would cost votes. Of course, the voters only care about the title and not the honorary nature of the title.

But that’s not all! Harrison’s camp is clearly full of seasoned politickers, and they knew that even with the avalanche of endorsements, Harrison had no chance.

No, Biermann, their greatest contributor to the perfectly sound New Catechism, had to be dragged through the mud.

Indeed, Biermann—more of a conservative than anything else—became the stalking horse of an imminent liberal takeover of the LCMS unseen since before Harrison became president (convenient framing for the Harrison camp, no?)

But I thought Harrison saved the Synod?

But how could Biermann be the harbinger of liberalism in the LCMS? The man used to teach that morality should be legislated, for crying out loud!

Thankfully, Harrison’s camp specializes in the fine art of guilt by association, and a lot of liberals really wanted Biermann.

Really, many more groups than liberals wanted Biermann. If one had to describe why Biermann experienced such a surge in support, it really comes down to one fact: he’s not Harrison. A commendable appeal, considering Harrison was not supposed to run again.

But those poor supporters of Biermann who simply wanted anyone else in charge were lumped in with the most ardent liberals by the Harrison campaign. This, I think, surprised them. I saw many of them asking, “but what about the 8th commandment?”

Unfortunately for them, Harrison’s team also specializes in aggressively interpreting the 8th commandment. Yet more unfortunate is the unofficial hermeneutic of the LCMS, that anything benefiting Harrison does not actually violate the 8th commandment. I feel bad for them.

But if Biermann’s core supporters were an eclectic group who wanted Harrison out, who were Harrison’s core supporters?

It’s entirely unclear. And it seems that Harrison was worried about the lack of support.

So, Harrison decided that he really needed to appeal to today’s youth. But the youth of today don’t want the same things as the boomers of yesterday. I suspect there was a great deal of strife from the Issues Etc. boomers when Harrison decided to interview on an outside podcast.

But it’s pretty clear that Harrison was desperate during the interview. When asked what to do about the young men kept out of the institutions, Harrison said those young men should be invited in and welcomed to the LCMS. What a flip-flop on his actions these last four years!

Yes, I could’ve sworn that Harrison, beholden to his boomer sensibilities and allies, is the man who has ruthlessly driven young men out of the LCMS! Beyond my own case, I’ve heard of other young men driven from congregations and young pastors removed for criticizing the man.

But that was far from Harrison’s biggest pivot this election.

No, in the process of begging for any votes from any voter, Harrison let slip that the entire CTCR did not review the New Catechism and instead parceled out the reviews. What a fascinating time to change the story!

“… it was a disaster.”

What a great admission! A “disaster”? Was this not the faithful book that was unfairly and unfoundedly maligned by the scary “alt-right”? How could the CTCR be at fault for a book that Harrison (and the holy CTCR) ruled to be faithful and sound?

But this interview, and who knows how many other promises and behind-the-scenes maneuvers, gave Harrison his necessary margin of five votes.

Five votes! What kind of Peruvian electoral absurdity has Lutheranism found itself in?

By this point, I’m sure there’s some Harrison supporter or creature of the synod ready to accuse me of secularizing matters of the church, making them out like American politics rather than something sacred, and otherwise wrongfully making light of serious matters.

That objection used to work, but I think now everyone can see what a farce this election was. Yes, both sides campaigned. Yes, the campaigns were political. No, this process was not holy, nor was it serious. It was only fitting that it ended by a margin of five votes.

But the biggest mockery has yet to come.

After the ubiquitous doom-mongering used throughout the election, we will now be told to calm down, that everyone confesses the same faith, and that we all need to get along and walk together. It’s enough to give one whiplash!

Already, Harrison’s supporters are saying that this is not a secular election, so pointing out Harrison’s 5-vote majority is meaningless. But that’s a false assumption. It was secular in all but name, and Harrison will continue politicking without support.

Even Harrison’s biggest supporters at Issues, Etc. understand the suffocating malaise surrounding his presidency. When they celebrated his victory, they led not with a photo of the man, but a photo of the more beloved man Harrison caricatures.