Thread by @MrsEmmaDunn

Ok, so having had time to watch and reflect on the #callthemidwife episode featuring an #intersex character, here are my thoughts: (1/15)

Firstly this was really hard to watch. I cried as Lois was intimately examined in front of a host of strange men. This was a pretty accurate reflection of my experiences as a teen. (2/15)

I lost count of the number of times that numerous students were “coincidentally” present when I needed an intimate exam. (3/15)

By the time I was diagnosed in the 90s, they were not invited to comment on my genitals though. Oddly, this wasn’t a huge comfort as they peered at my private parts in fascinated silence... (4/15)

They probably didn’t comment because unlike Lois, I was not told I was intersex (even in the “mix of sexes” language used in the program). My diagnosis was withheld from me. (5/15)

Those people examining me intimately knew something about me that I wasn’t privy to. I can’t describe how sick and angry this makes me feel. Like I was a specimen in a zoo. (6/15)

I’m not sure that someone in Lois’ position in the 60s would have been told either. I think that like me, they would have been fobbed off, but we can see from what follows for Lois that disclosure is VITAL. (7/15)

Because I wasn’t given a diagnosis, the help and support that Lois received was not available to me. The stigma, horror and shame was the same; I was just left to deal with this alone. (8/15)

I cried again when Lois’ mum broke down. Like Lois, I had to tell my parents that I was intersex without help & support (once I’d figured out the truth and confronted my doctors) (9/15)

I didn’t have the language or knowledge to answer their questions & the guilt I felt was huge, if illogical - as Trixie says to Lois, no-one can help how they’re born. But I couldn’t help feeling like I’d let my parents down. (10/15)

Unlike Lois, I didn’t have a wedding booked when I was diagnosed. Instead, I had PLENTY of boyfriends who ended things when they found out I was infertile. I had to wait another 20 years to find my soulmate. (11/15)

I found my Paul though - & he was worth the wait! This is where @CallTheMidwife1 got it SO right. Intersex people are not freaks.
We’re just people, like everyone else. (12/15)

We can have male and/or female identities, we can fall in love and we can be loved in return for just who we are. (13/15)

We can have happy, healthy, loving relationships and fulfilling lives (I might not have been able to become a mum, but I’m the BEST AUNTIE EVER). We deserve equality & respect. We’re human, just like everyone else. (14/15)

If you were moved by this storyline, please get involved. Learn about the injustice and inequalities #intersex people face. Educate your family and friends. Be our allies. We need you.

Thanks for reading (15/15)