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Chris Profile picture
@402_Chris
Feb 4, 2020 • 3 tweets • 1 min read • Read on X
Amy Klobuchar treating this TV downtime like it's open mic night at the comedy club in my hometown. Only thing missing is a brick wall behind her.

#IowaCaucuses #IACaucus
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Best I could do.

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More from @402_Chris

Chris Profile picture
Mar 30, 2022
(Thread)

Bruce Willis announced that he's stepping away from acting due to an aphasia diagnosis.

About 12 years ago, my Dad had a massive stroke. He was diagnosed, shortly thereafter, with Aphasia. Here's a little bit what it's been like for us and for him.
First, I'll state the obvious: when it comes to matters of the brain and the human body, no two people seem to be alike. These are our experiences and in no way predictive of what the Willis family will go through or what Bruce himself will deal with.
Second: I'm far from medically inclined and I may miss on some of the details of his condition or get them wrong. I encourage all of you to go to aphasia.org for actual smart people saying actual smart things.
Read 34 tweets
Chris Profile picture
Sep 21, 2020
National pundits trying to burn Nebraska football with some giant, curtain-pulling reveal of our mediocrity like the miserably predictable magicians that they are; ignoring the fact that we put the fucking rabbit in the hat backstage already.
Like, "Tah-Dah!" You guys had Mike Riley as a coach and have underperformed.

What a fucking revelatory move, David Blaine. Hell of a plot twist, considering we were in the writers room the entire time, you stumblefucking twits.
"Abra-Cadabra! You guys care way too much!"

Whoa, Houdini. My mind just blew the fuck out of my skull, like we're not B-Rabbit kicking our own ass and then handing them the mic to try to tell us how we over-Tweet and underwin.
Read 8 tweets
Chris Profile picture
Sep 8, 2020
Psssh, I've been creating personal branding logos and more for the #Huskers for years.

For instance: take this microbrew I made for Shawn Eichorst. (*Rest in Power Big Eich!) Image
Or this original song I created for former Defensive Coordinator, John Papuchis:
Or this poster I made after Tanner Lee threw, like, 11 pick sixes in one season: Image
Read 7 tweets
Chris Profile picture
Aug 13, 2020
Say what you want about Plies, but this hat is f-ing dope. Image
Damnnn...there's more. Image
Image
Read 5 tweets
Chris Profile picture
Aug 11, 2020
Nebraska leaves the Big Ten, signs a streaming deal with Amazon -- giving them access to the program a la 'Hard Knocks' -- and giving NU a direct & unprecedented pipeline to proper medical supplies and merch distribution (I have no idea how this actually works, so bear with me).
They show a fully televised scrimmage, a 7-on-7s contest, and a skills challenge on consecutive weekends that enable the team to showcase themselves and enable Amazon to have an "Adults Only", swear-words/drinking encouraged broadcast of a game against Iowa after a few weeks.
They also feature Scott Frost and Mario Verduzco going one-on-one in both chess and beer pong. Iowa gets a $2,000,000 check for participating and Nebraska makes bank.

#Huskers #GBR #iknowitsliterallyimpossible
Read 5 tweets
Chris Profile picture
Aug 4, 2020
RIP to the place that once sold me a case of Beer Thirty Light for $11.98.

Again, I bought an entire 30 cams of beer for under $12. And it tasted like it. Image
Beer Thirty Light, which has a STAGGERING 1.5 rating on a beer app. Image
And which -- and I'm sure this was purely in my own mind, but I can't shake the fact that it feels wholly accurate as I reflect on it now -- somehow TASTED purple, like the box. Image
Read 4 tweets

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