Thread by @justice_arman

DM: your axe drips blood onto the temple's marble floor. one lone kobold stands holding a piece of parchment defensively

BARBARIAN: i raise my weapon

DM: he flips the page around, revealing gold arcane sigils

DM: it's a wish scroll

WIZARD: oh my god EVERBODY STAY CALM

#dnd

BARBARIAN: i can't remember his initiative

WIZARD: back away slowly

BARBARIAN: i could have sworn mine was higher, right?

WIZARD: Back. Away. SLOWLY.

BARBARIAN: i'm pretty fast tho

#dnd

ROGUE: mine was definitely before his

WIZARD:

ROGUE: i think

WIZARD: we are NOT having this discussion

ROGUE: can he even read, tho?

WIZARD: why are you still talking

ROGUE: i'm pretty fast too

#dnd

SORCERER: y'all

WIZARD: this is obviously a tremendous risk

BARBARIAN: was it a risk when i jumped on that dracolich

WIZARD: yes, yes it was

SORCERER: yoooooo

BARBARIAN: you are small and frail

SORCERER: Y'ALL

BOTH: what?!

SORCERER: he's whispering

#dnd

WIZARD: stop moving

EVERYONE: *stops*

KOBOLD: *looks up*

WIZARD (whispering): we have his attention

KOBOLD: [screeches in kobold]

WIZARD: nvm do it now DO IT NOW

BARBARIAN: i throw my axe

#dnd

DM: your axe flies through the air with a fwoom-fwoom sound as it clashes with the kobold's head

BARBARIAN: YESS

DM: he eeks out the last word of his incantation as he falls to the ground

WIZARD: nonononono

DM: there's a flash of light from the scroll

BARBARIAN: shyeet

#dnd

DM: the kobold's lifeless corpse lays on the marble, scroll in hand

WIZARD: i approach
WIZARD: *looks at barb* CAUTIOUSLY

DM: the scroll smokes with arcane fumes, its magic spent

WIZARD: what.

DM: *smiles*

WIZARD: what did he wish for??

DM: you'll have to wait and see

#dnd