Thread by @gradydoctor

1/
Motivational-ish interviewing (PreCOVID)

I'd just finished this heartfelt soliloquy about smoking cessation. We talked about grandbabies and his life and his lungs and his heart. He was looking deep into my eyes--like it was really resonating.

Me: "So, what do you think?"

2/
Me: "How ready to you feel to quit?"

He furrowed his brow and squinted his eyes. Then he settled back into the chair next to the desk and let out an easy smile. A pack of Newports bulged in his front pocket.

He saw me see it and let out an exasperated sigh.

Shoot.

3/
Next he rubbed his head, let out a raspy chuckle, and shook his head.

Him: "Tell me, doc. You ever had somebody piss you off REAL bad on a job you hate--then step outside on a break, flick your lighter and then take a good, hard drag on a menthol cigarette?"

*silence*

4/
Him: "I ain't thank so.”

*silence*

Him: “What about when you come home and your kids say Daddy the lights off--and you know you ain't gon' have the money for it for like 3-4 days--so you set down on your porch, strike a match and you light you one--just to ease your nerves?"

5/
He grew animated.

Him: "Or this!" *snaps finger* "Ever smoked while playing a good hand of spades with your favorite, shit-talking partner and some cognac? Or helped your brother pressure-wash his driveway all day on a Saturday?"

He threw his head back and laughed. Hard.

6/
Him: *speaking low* “You ever leaned on your elbow covered in sweat and shared a cigarette in bed after a reeeeal good—"
Me: *interrupting* "I haven’t.”

*laughter*

He looked amused at my naiveté. The rectangle outline was still unapologetically showing in his shirt pocket.

7/
Him: "I ain't thank so. ‘Cause if you had? You’d know quitting smoking ain't easy as some rah rah peptalk ‘bout how people love me and a scale of 1 to 10."

Out came that gravelly laugh again. This time at me.

Damn.

8/
His face grew serious but warm.

Him: “I 'preciate you taking the time on this. But my suggestion is that you slow on down and thank about what you asking--and what it mean to WHO you asking, hear?”

Me: *tiny nod*

Him: “Then maybe we can meet someplace in the middle, ok?”

9/
Whoa. Now I could see it.

Him kneeling next to a bucket of soapy water washing his car--a square dangling between his lips. Or shuffling a deck of cards while trash-talking with that grainy voice of his.

He was right. I hadn't thought about what my ask meant to HIS life.

10/
I twisted my mouth and sighed.

Me: “I’m sorry.”
Him: “Awww, don’t be.”
Me: "I hear you, though."

*smiling*

Him: "I'm on' think about it, okay? That’s the best I can do right now. Think about quitting first. Then maybe I just might do it."
Me: "That's what's up."

11/
I prepared to leave.

Me: *at the door* "Wow. You really sell smoking. Made me feel like I was missing out!"

*laughter*

Him: "Oh . . .I ain't even get started on when you take the ashtray into the bathroom first thang in the morning!"

He rubbed his belly for emphasis.

12/
Me: "Hold up . . . .you mean while you. . ."
Him: "Hell, it's already some matches in there so why not?"
Me: "Wait--why are there matches--oh eeeewww!"

He smacked his leg and howled in laughter. With that rich, throaty laugh of his.

This time with me.

13/
Here’s what I know for sure:

Patients motivate US, too.

You know what else I know?

I know that I took the extraordinary ordinary of Pre-COVID patient care for granted. Damn, I did.

That is all.

#ProudtobeGIM #bestjobever #listenandlearn #hequit