I... the people don't get it, who are asking "Where's the evidence, where's the allegations? I read the thread and it just sounds like bad relationships."
They are looking for something exciting.
"Rooting out abuse!"
But. The thing is.
"Let's get our evidence in order before we sharpen the pitchforks." is the reasoning of someone who sees pitchforks as the next step.
I don't know what sensation is more addictive to the human brain.
They don't understand how messy and close in and tangled up the situations we're navigating really are.
But it's not about the high.
Do you know the secret of the song "You're So Vain"? You know who it's about?
I do.
I'll tell you.
It's about Carly Simon.
Same reason you don't think anything is "actionable" (what action was demanded, exactly?) now: because it's all so banal, all so drearily commonplace, all so.
Normal.
Ized.
If you make a habit of it, nobody needs to prove their case for not wanting to take the same car as you.
(Though, honestly, if you repeatedly did the elevator thing in a professional setting, you might get fired.)
Would you warn your female friends about dating him? Would you want the people you care about to know?
That's how common this is.
We want this to be recognized for what it is, and we want it to stop.
Because we are tired, and hurt, and disappointed.
Disappointed, but not terribly surprised.