400 years later, we get a glimpse of life at a BEAUTIFUL planet called Mul. Pearlescent people, beaches, and lifestyle.
Please don't make me eat my words!!!
I feel like they're trying to do a Han Solo and Leia thing, but there's so many problems already.
And it occurs to me that this movie exists for the wonderful sceneries and settings and not much else. I can be okay with this.
Val meets with Cooper and gets science fiction thrown at him. I'm trying to figure out the rules here, but I'm getting lost so easily.
After a few playful scenes with this idea, he gets unstuck and makes a mad dash with Laure to the "safe point".
Now we arrive at Valerian!
Again, the setting and aliens are super cool! (Makes me wanna play Subnautica).
Wait, incoming ships are "intruders"? The fuck...?
Then we see Laure get the Converter to make more diamonds. And she looks/sounds as if she found toast.
Turns out they're torturing the Mul people for info. Also, have military-esque EVERYTHING. Gee, is Alpha the bad guys?
Bubble wasn't a random plot tool you could throw away! She was her own person! WHAT THE FUCK?! They got a woman of color to talk up how AMAZING a white woman is and then die!
SO PISSED.
The ghost of the princess from the beginning is guiding Val through, helping him find her people.
"I'm a soldier." YOU PUNCHED THE COMMANDER AND BROKE EVERY RULE. NO YOU AINT.
5/10, worth watching for creative ideas, but maybe watch it in a foreign language.
WE WERE ROBBED!