So, not to be a wet blanket, but there's a viral video going around of a woman who repeatedly parks her car beside a gas pump with her gas cap on the opposite side of the car because she's confused. She does it, like, three or four times. (thread)
Meanwhile, a couple is filming her from their car not too far away and laughing the whole time. I'm not trying to shame anyone here or say you're a bad person or some other nonsense for sharing the video or laughing at it, but let's back up for a second and consider some things.
This woman wasn't bothering or hurting anyone. She was minding her own business. She happened to be super confused on how to park near the gas pump, something most of us have done once or twice, but it literally did not affect anyone else other than her.
(Side note: why not get out and walk over to help this person after you see they're struggling?)
It's kinda disturbing to me that this woman--or anyone--could be filmed going about their daily lives, unaware that they're being filmed by strangers, never consenting to it being shared online. That by the time they get home, they find out they're going viral for an honest goof.
What's more is that her license plate is clearly visible in the video and although masked (she's the kind of person who wears a mask even while driving, so bonus points on that), she is more than likely recognizable to those who know her.
And finally, something I didn't think about until MUCH later is that she might have a disability that leads to confusion over the gas pump. Again, I don't say that to shame anyone, but it is something to consider that may not be so obvious.
I have no problem with assholes being filmed for doing asshole things to others and called out for it. By all means, have a ball. Record and post away.
But it's deeply concerning to me that we're increasingly seeing a common respect for basic consideration of privacy be eroded away because we're all carrying cell phones that are technologically capable of recording and editing short films.
Because it's not just a video. It's the comfort we should all expect to be able to navigate the public square without feeling like our every movement is vulnerable to recording by strangers and put online.
It's creepy and dangerous. It makes people feel unsafe.
It's creepy and dangerous. It makes people feel unsafe.
Last year, I was at a trans rights rally and a transphobe took a pic of me in which I was wearing jeans. They circled my crotch with red and posted it everywhere online. It was really weird and creepy.
I thought I looked great--and I still do, thank you very much--but it also made me feel really vulnerable, like someone with such little regard for privacy and consideration would have no problem, say, inflicting an act of violence or further harassing me.
I don't know exactly where the line should be drawn on expectations of privacy in a world of smartphones and I'm certainly no expert on privacy, but I feel like being graceful and considerate of others is a good place to start.
"Do I need to film this?"
"Does this person know they're being filmed?"
"Am I possibly causing harm?"
"Why am I filming this?"
Answering these questions is a particularly good place to start.
"Does this person know they're being filmed?"
"Am I possibly causing harm?"
"Why am I filming this?"
Answering these questions is a particularly good place to start.
I know this will come across as scolding, and it's not intended to. We're all human, we all laugh at random things, we all make ridiculous mistakes or just leave our brain at home sometimes.
But we are also all entitled to consent and a baseline of dignity and respect.
But we are also all entitled to consent and a baseline of dignity and respect.
Because if we can't be comfortable in our skin when out in public, that's a problem, and while a perfect world doesn't exist, it doesn't mean we shouldn't work toward a society that prioritizes consent. Food for thought. /thread
