Thread by @ArmaniTalks

2 people to Avoid Dating:

-Can't be alone
-Low self-esteem

Feels good in the beginning of these relationships.

Over time, highly toxic

'Why do you list out these 2 specific traits?'

You wanna know?

'I wanna know.'

Then you shall know...👇

Time is something that we don't get back

Which is why its great to use it correctly

But the game of life is us using our time incorrectly to gain wisdom to use it correctly

One of the lessons we learn the hard way is trying to change people

It seems noble.

Yet, self development is a journey from within, not by coercion

You can't try to change someone who sees nothing to change

They will only find you to be a nuisance for doing so

Yet, our noble minds try to do this

2 people to avoid dating are people who:

1. Can't be alone
2. Have low self esteem

2 often leads to 1

So these 2 peope are often the same

Self esteem is something we need to actively work on

That's the core fundamental of self improvements

Self esteem will not just be presented to you because you 'wish' for it

Otherwise, everyone in the planet would be oozing confidence

Not the case.

Self esteem needs to be ACTIVELY worked on

'So?'

So...the person with low self esteem can put in the work to improve themselves

Or just take the shortcut & find someone who is improving themselves

If it's the latter, then toxicity is imminent

Self development is a mindset.

And opposite mindsets can coexist for so long

I'm not talking about political beliefs in regards to mindset.

That's a different topic

All I'm coming down to is....

Is the mindset:

-Empowering
OR
-Draining

?

An empowering mindset (a person leveling up) can be with a draining mindset for just so long.

It can be for a few weeks

Few months

Few years...

Until time runs its course

One of the tough lessons learned is that:

A draining person can pull an empowering person down

Rather than an empowering person pulling a draining person up

Read that again.

These people with low self esteem & who can't be alone seem fun at first

And they make the high social value person feel even more important

Bc everyone likes the feeling of being 'needed.'

But after some time, that shit gets draining

And it becomes a person trying to fix the emotional state of another person.

If they can't be alone, that's the biggest red flag out there

They need attention

And if you are gone for a few weeks for a business trip...then who knows, they may seek attention

Toxic over time

And red flags buried are red flags that pile up

And empowering force can be with a draining force for so long

Remember that

The list of red flags can be added for days

But these are 2 core fundamentals

Low self esteem in itself is not bad...as long as it's being actively worked on

If it's not being worked on, then the draining force will suck the life out of everything it touches

Beware of trying to change people

You don't get your time back

Invest it wisely, or learn life's lessons the painful way

Either way, life is geared for you to learn at one point or another

For more emotional intelligence truths, follow @ArmaniTalks 🌍🚀