Thread by @karlajstrand

Sunny Hostin @sunny moderates panel including @ProfessorCrunk and Robin Diangelo discussing allyship. #19thRepresents

Cooper: White women feel allied with white men that Black women don't have. Black women must fight white men and women. Just bc you are awhite woman, doesn't mean you get to be first. Can we let a Black woman be first? #19thRepresents

Cooper: Many white women fought the Black vote during the suffrage movement. Black men more fit than white women? Many white suffragists resented it. In current moment, we need to trust Black women to govern and lead. #19thRepresents

DiAngelo: It's rational for Black people to not trust white women to be allies. We keep letting you down. When we raise anti-Blackness, it serves white women. It's why white women benefit most from affirmative action. #19thRepresents

DiAngelo: If we keep upholding patriarchy and white supremacy, we can't be fully trusted. We haven't shown up consistently to now. WW likely to support Biden/Harris ticket bc now it's in our best interests. Will we continue to support Harris? #19thRepresents

Cooper: Issues that galvanize BW voters differ from WW issues. WW also vote their racial interests, not just BW as they have been accused of previously. WW overlooked misogyny and sexual violence of DT bc WW ride for white men as apparent in the 2016 election.#19thRepresents

Cooper: If white men can't benefit from white supremacy and dominate, WW see that as a failure. BW fight for lives of their sons but WW fight for sons getting/maintaining privilege and superiority. #19thRepresents

Cooper: All women could unify over issues such as reproductive freedom but we can't if we are still most concerned about our own racial security. #19thRepresents

DiAngelo: Hopefully WW are feeling offended. "Prove us wrong, please!" We are so not post-racial. WW don't represent the norm or the universal experience. WW must recognize this. Stop being manipulated by racial and patriarchal fears. #19thRepresents

DiAngelo: We have to change the way we think about sharing and opening up. It's not that WW will lose out. Instead, more women will win if we come together. #19thRepresents

DiAngelo: Even when WW fight against patriarchy and gender inequity, we must look too at how we benefit from racial privilege and oppression of others. Get over feeling privilege-shamed. Let that guide you in your responses to BW. #19thRepresents

Cooper: Only way forward is to acknowledge the past, and this affects their ability to trust WW. White people have to build up racial stamina (DiAngelo). Cooper is tired of talking to WW about race. BW have a right to their rage about this. #19thRepresents

Cooper: No one care about the tears of BW and girls. WW need to recognize BW are tired and irritated of dealing with this. WW must realize BW might not be so nice and might experience their rage. You've been a WW longer than you've been "woke." #19thRepresents

Cooper: So now WW need to grow up and deal with BW rage. No tears, etc. BW will bring it to the table when they feel a WW can handle it or is more awake but for those WW who aren't, not going to waste the time. #19thRepresents

DiAngelo: Racial stamina comes from realizing "it's about you, but it's not about you." If you're a WW and are seeing rage of BW, understand that that BW has had it and may feel open enough to express it to you. #19thRepresents

DiAngelo: WW tears are a barrier to allyship, they are political. We've all been socialized to react to WW tears. We interpret and express emotions through a particular sociopolitical framework, these behaviors have an impact. #19thRepresents

Cooper: White manhood and womanhood are built on narrative of dangerous Black men and people. WW know we have been beneficiaries of this. BW are socialized not to cry in public. WW have the "right" to cry and BW do not. This theme has a long history. #19thRepresents

Cooper: WW know how to weaponize femininity and fragility. [Amy Cooper has been brought up as an example throughout this part of the conversation.] Good white women liberals are often the worst enemies. You undermind BW, not good allies even in liberal spaces. #19thRepresents

Cooper: WW liberals don't think they are the problem, which is a big part of the problem. #19thRepresents

DiAngelo: WW know not to cry in a male-dominated environment bc we recognize the direction of power. So why so comfortable crying in front of BW and not in front of men? We know why. Very revealing. #19thRepresents

DiAngelo: WW can learn from BW who are getting paid to educate but WW are not owed any info from BW. If you pay attention, WW can learn by listening, not having to ask for BW labor to educate them. #19thRepresents

Cooper: There's an art to this relationship-building. WW must build relationships with POC. How you keep on showing up will be the best trust-builder. Don't dwell on mistakes, WW should think about this as a journey. Like learning a new language. #19thRepresents

Cooper: WW can become fluent once you commit to the work. When WW realize they are part of the problem and they don't rush it, don't think there is a magic solution to follow, put in the work, you will be fine. #19thRepresents

Cooper: Performativity is acting for cookies. It's for what you look like in front of others. Genuine allyship involves risk. WW can't get absolution after the fact of racism; you must risk something and show up in the moment. #19thRepresents

DiAngelo: WW and BW could meet over issues but also over targeted universalism, which is if we targeted BW issues, we would also address WW issues. Quoting Pat Parker - First, forget that I'm Black. Second, don't you ever forget I am Black. [Look it up, WW] #19thRepresents

Cooper: Pay equity is a place we can start. Also, housing crisis, eviction crisis affect BW. Racial justice protests have set stage now we need to keep that going in policymaking. If BW/most marginalized are free, everyone gets free. #19thRepresents

Cooper: When BW don't have to struggle every day, then they have the space to create capacity for emotional work.
DiAngelo: Assume it's you, WW, that send BW home exhausted each day and address that. Don't be complacent. #19thRepresents

DiAngelo: WW are growing in capacity and tools to do the work. WW must learn to center BW, use our platforms to do this and it will benefit us all. If WW would realize this, we'd really be able unify. If WW use privilege to center BW's agenda we can all get free. #19thRepresents

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