Mistakes I made in my 30s
A thread...
A thread...
I hired people with strong pedigree and great brands on their resume, ignoring how they operated as people.
I assumed their degrees will drive their success.
As you grow professionally, it is not what you know instead how you deal with people, that determines your success.
I assumed their degrees will drive their success.
As you grow professionally, it is not what you know instead how you deal with people, that determines your success.
I told myself that relationships can wait.
That call to my parents can wait.
Saying "I love you" to my wife and kids can wait.
Spending time with them without my phone can wait.
I told myself, "I don't have the time"
Time is the only thing that matters.
Everything else can wait.
That call to my parents can wait.
Saying "I love you" to my wife and kids can wait.
Spending time with them without my phone can wait.
I told myself, "I don't have the time"
Time is the only thing that matters.
Everything else can wait.
I managed everyone the same way.
My way.
The way that was easy for me, scalable for me, convenient for me.
If there is anything that should not scale with size, it is leadership.
It should get harder for you to lead, as you grow.
Because people are different.
They are not you!
My way.
The way that was easy for me, scalable for me, convenient for me.
If there is anything that should not scale with size, it is leadership.
It should get harder for you to lead, as you grow.
Because people are different.
They are not you!
I felt having a second child would be a disaster.
It would make me feel even more guilt for not being present as a father to our son.
When you don't have anyone, you have your siblings.
And that's something you don't ask for.
Your parents gift you that gift.
It would make me feel even more guilt for not being present as a father to our son.
When you don't have anyone, you have your siblings.
And that's something you don't ask for.
Your parents gift you that gift.
I put all my savings into illiquid assets - real estate, startups.
And when we went through financial turmoil, we lived like urban poors.
Selling jewelry to make ends meet.
It is easy to cut a cheque.
Only when you see money come out of it, do you call it an investment!
And when we went through financial turmoil, we lived like urban poors.
Selling jewelry to make ends meet.
It is easy to cut a cheque.
Only when you see money come out of it, do you call it an investment!
I assumed everyone's definition of and motivation for success is the same.
That of glory. That of respect. That of inspiring others.
Everyone has a different definition of success.
And only if your work sets other people up for their success, will you be successful yourself.
That of glory. That of respect. That of inspiring others.
Everyone has a different definition of success.
And only if your work sets other people up for their success, will you be successful yourself.
After the birth of our first child I felt I lost my partner to my son's mother.
I missed my friend, my confidant.
Because she was always busy in rearing our child.
It is only when both parents contribute in raising their child, that they keep their partnership alive.
I missed my friend, my confidant.
Because she was always busy in rearing our child.
It is only when both parents contribute in raising their child, that they keep their partnership alive.
I felt bad once all the awards stopped coming my way, after I started nearbuy.
When I had an easy job at Groupon, I was spoken of.
When I worked the hardest ever, no one noticed.
The awards were never for us.
They are for the positions we hold.
When I had an easy job at Groupon, I was spoken of.
When I worked the hardest ever, no one noticed.
The awards were never for us.
They are for the positions we hold.
I felt VCs were in the business of building businesses together with the founders.
And our interests were thus aligned.
VCs are in the business of entering and exiting businesses.
And that often means, the interests will eventually clash.
And our interests were thus aligned.
VCs are in the business of entering and exiting businesses.
And that often means, the interests will eventually clash.
I was convinced I would do well financially, if I became an entrepreneur.
I would raise tons of money, be worth millions.
Never start up because you want to make money from it.
The odds of making the same money through a "boring" professional career, is much higher.
I would raise tons of money, be worth millions.
Never start up because you want to make money from it.
The odds of making the same money through a "boring" professional career, is much higher.
I assumed people will be ok if we lay them off and find them another job.
No!
Laying people off is rarely about the job.
It is about their self respect.
No!
Laying people off is rarely about the job.
It is about their self respect.
I maxed my credit cards, borrowed money from friends, delayed on my payments, just so I could continue to maintain the lifestyle that I had.
I felt going down on that was a sign of failure.
Treating our lifestyle standards as a measure of our success, is a sign of failure.
I felt going down on that was a sign of failure.
Treating our lifestyle standards as a measure of our success, is a sign of failure.
I thought that no one wants to be led. Everyone wants to do their own thing, so let them.
Not true.
99% people want to be led. They want to be told what to do, and then they will go on to do their best.
They want to be led. Not managed.
Not true.
99% people want to be led. They want to be told what to do, and then they will go on to do their best.
They want to be led. Not managed.
I allowed my irrational optimism about the future to take over the need to be deliberate and thoughtful before taking decisions.
I assumed a "everything will be ok" approach towards everything.
Hope is not a strategy.
I assumed a "everything will be ok" approach towards everything.
Hope is not a strategy.
In my 20s, I dropped out of my PhD, finished an MBA, worked in consulting earning a lot, started up with some success, had founder conflicts that led me to leave.
At 29, I was jobless, with no money, no plans and no visibility.
But I learnt a lot
At 29, I was jobless, with no money, no plans and no visibility.
But I learnt a lot
In my 30s, I started 2 business, raised money, laid off people, made absolutely no money for myself and my investors, made poor people decisions, wasn't a good father.
At 39, I am jobless, with no money, no plans and no visibility.
But I wouldn't have it any other way.
At 39, I am jobless, with no money, no plans and no visibility.
But I wouldn't have it any other way.
I am fortunate that my 30s were much better than my 20s, when it comes to the mistakes that I made and the impact of them.
As the decade passed, I realized what is truly important in life
As the decade passed, I realized what is truly important in life
It wasn't money for me, or fame or recognition.
It was the ability to do what I wanted to, without caring about what the world thinks of me.
It was the ability to do what I wanted to, without caring about what the world thinks of me.
I made a lot of mistakes on my way, to arrive at this definition of success for me.
And I consider myself fortunate.
If it weren't for these mistakes, I would still be a ill-aware 39 yr old adult, who knows nothing better than a 5yr old does!
And I consider myself fortunate.
If it weren't for these mistakes, I would still be a ill-aware 39 yr old adult, who knows nothing better than a 5yr old does!
Reflecting upon my mistakes has taught me the most about myself.
I hope it does the same magic for you too :)
I hope it does the same magic for you too :)
