Which Biblical characters are these:

1) "Na birthright I go chop?"

2) "Fine geh, we don meet before?"
"Yes nau- I be your 275th wife!"
"Ah! Ok..."

3) "Bros J, how? pesin go enter him mama belle again?"

4) "No be 3 people una throw inside the fire? E be like na 4 I dey see o!"
5) "Bros, how you wan take fetch the water? Wey ya bucket?"

6) "Make una jus throway me inside the water, everything go calm"

7) "E be like say dis man dey among dem!"
"Me? I no know de man o!"

8) "Na Peter dey knock o!"
Peter? You dey craze!"

9) "Your guy Lazarus dey sick!"
10) "Bros J, come fes..." He took him aside: "Wetin you dey yarn like dis nau? Abeg, stop dat nonsense!"

11) See dis boy! You think say I be bingo? You wan use stick fight me? See me see trouble!"

12) "Who be dat? He suppose die, as he no get pity!"

13) Son, na you be ram o!"
14) "Who be David? All dis small boys wey run from dem oga..."

15) Abeg, no vex! As I hear your voice, I come fear, as I no wear anything."

16) "Na who make we send?"
"Make una send me!"

17) "Bros P! Wish kain nonsense you dey do like dis nau? You don become hypocrite o..."
18) "Dis man- you get sense o! Oya- comman work for me as Prime Minister..."

19) "Make una calm down! I don kill lion, I don kill bear before- na giant remain..."

20) "Ha! Ok, give am the baby o! Abeg, no kill am!"

Let's test you knowledge of the Pidgin English Bible...
😇

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More from @harrydaniyan

Apr 9
"Calm down! CALM DOWN!"
She was talking too fast, I couldn't understand her.
But I knew she was hurt.
And ANGRY!

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From the background noise, I knew she was in traffic.
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Hearing her so agitated set an alarm ringing in my head.
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I've heard this submission countless times.
And it's amazing how a lot of Christians believe this NONSENSE...
There's a Nigerian Church that teaches "Sanctification" as a doctrine: when you get Born Again, you still need to be "sanctified" BEFORE you can be baptized in the Holy Spirit, they teach.

Yet, Cornelius & his household got baptized in the Holy Spirit BEFORE they got Born Again!
When you show them SCRIPTURE that renders their sanctification doctrine false, they tell you, "THIS IS AFRICA!"

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O ye foolish Nigerian Christians!!!!
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Jan 31
A couple got married.
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He was more interested in his reputation as "The Pastor Who Joins Couples That Never Divorce" than the interest & feelings of the couple.

As far as he was concerned, "Stay married & keep my reputation intact!"
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If Pastors are not careful, they will shift their focus from MINISTRY to REPUTATION.

I once heard a Pastor say, "none of my Church Members will die in Jesus' Name!"
I just smiled.

Your members are young, Bro! They're aged 17-35...
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Gary listed these Languages as:
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*Gifts.
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He described each of these languages in detail.
Very interesting book... Image
Gary explained that people would have better relationships with their spouses if they understood the language their spouses speak.

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That will make her happier- & cheaper for me: saves me the money I spend on gifts!
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Jan 17
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When she was done, one of her colleagues asked, "Who was that on the phone?"
She replied in a very loud & angry voice: "IS IT NOT THE IDIOT I MARRIED?"

Woah!!!
😳😳😳
Everybody was shocked!
She stormed out of the office & slammed the door.
That was sometime in 2006, 18 years ago.

She later reconciled with her husband & they moved on.
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It became a joke in the office...
😊
When we close from work & he comes to pick her, you'd hear people saying, "Awwww! The IDIOT has come to pick his wife!"

She NEVER knew her indiscretion in the office that day would turn her into a laughing stock.
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One of K's friend, B knew one of the Doctors in the hospital & he called him up.
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B went to the others who were praying.
"What did the doctor say", they asked...
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In that moment, another friend, J rushed in!
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Read 8 tweets

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