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Mark Greene Profile picture
@RemakingManhood
Sep 25, 2020 • 9 tweets • 3 min read • Read on X
I'm primarily responsible for washing dishes, cooking, cleaning bathrooms, laundry, and general house cleaning. There are days when it is joyful and there are days when it feels bleak and oppressive. I CAN NOT IMAGINE what lifetimes felt like for women of my mother's generation.
Women of my mother's generation had a lifetime of this work forced on them, work which grew exponentially with each birth, many of which were unplanned. I'm looking at a few years of the current arrangement for a family of 3. My mother did it for 7 people for three decades.
If I had to stare down that 30 year tunnel, knowing full well my economic security hung in the balance, that my husband was missing in action much of the time, I'm not sure I would survive it. Men, do ALL the housework for a year. Only then will you understand what I'm getting at
The reactivity of women about men not doing their share of housework is born out of the lived experience of cleaning a bathroom for years only to watch it get wrecked by people for whom your work is INVISIBLE. And the "you knew what you were getting in to," argument is bullshit.
I have the luxury of having negotiated my agreement to take care of the house. My partner @thinkplay is our primary wage earner. Having agreed to this arrangement (and being grateful for it) does not change the drudgery or endlessness of it. The seeming invisibility of my work.
If my partner just assumed I would do all cooking and cleaning, childcare, along with my career, if I had NO CHOICE based solely on my gender, that I had to do it, it would be sickening, exhausting and oppressive. Why men can't muster the empathy to see this shocks me.
House work is not optional for any man. It is a moral failing to see it otherwise.
This post is available in article form on Medium. medium.com/@remakingmanho…
Mark Greene is the author of The Little #MeToo Book for Men and Remaking Manhood, available at Barnes & Noble online and Amazon.
At Barnes & Noble Online: barnesandnoble.com/w/the-little-m…

At Amazon: amazon.com/dp/0983466963

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More from @RemakingManhood

Mark Greene Profile picture
Apr 14
The reason men in the manosphere are so angry at women? Because empowerment for women requires accountability from men. For men, being held accountable, and moreso, *holding ourselves accountable* in relationships where women have equal power requires self-reflection. /1
For men raised in our bullying dominance-based culture of masculinity, self reflection is forbidden, punished. Who we authentically are doesn’t matter in Man Box culture, We are trained instead to model our identity on a narrow set of rules for how to be a man. /2
“Don’t show your emotions. Be tough. Have control of women and girls. Be heterosexual. Never talk about anything deep. Be a breadwinner not a caregiver. Have lots of sex.” All these rules require we show dominance over those around us, including over the women in our lives. /3
Read 17 tweets
Mark Greene Profile picture
Feb 26
“Protect women from other women” Bro, this is absolutely comical.
Men create the predatory capitalism that starves women, the culture of violence that assaults women, the systems of power that exclude women, and the tedious bullying caricatures of manhood that bore women. Image
The sad reality is that our Man Box culture of masculinity provides protection to no one. Bullying hyper-competitive dominance-based masculinity leaves boys and men deeply disconnected and isolated resulting in health impacts equal to smoking. We literally die earlier.
Men’s protection fantasies born out of growing up bullied and policed by other boys and men leave us unable to imagine any other system but rigid hierarchy. One in which we’re taught women are less, trained to see empathy, connection, community and care giving as feminine, weak.
Read 9 tweets
Mark Greene Profile picture
Feb 9
These. Sick. Monsters. Image
@IAmPoliticsGirl @MeidasTouch
@shannonrwatts In every election since Roe was overturned, Republicans have lost. Traditionally red states Kansas and Ohio voted to protect abortion rights by wide margins. Republicans performed very badly in the 2022 midterms. We can win if we vote! Register here. Vote.org
Read 10 tweets
Mark Greene Profile picture
Feb 3
‘Too Many Women Are Going to College!’-There’s a narrative out there that more women are going to college than men because of educational bias, unfair advantages, and so on. It’s based on a male victimhood narrative, cuz that’s how male supremacy works. /1medium.com/equality-inclu…
These narratives always have a grain of truth. Yes, boys are struggling in many educational contexts. Yes, a lot of programs have been implemented to encourage women in STEM and other areas. Fine. We get that. We need to address what’s going on for boys. Thanks for that grain. /2
But why do women gravitate towards education? First and foremost, women and non-gender binary people pursue education because there is great joy for all humans in exploring the issues and ideas we’re interested in. /3
Read 22 tweets
Mark Greene Profile picture
Nov 28, 2023
THREAD: has been posting about "femme phobia", men's fear of the feminine. Really important framing in that term. /1MamaMuse.nyc
I explore the harmful masculine cultural influences by which universal human capacities for connection, caregiving, empathy, are falsely gendered by our dominance-based culture of masculinity as female, and then bullied and shamed out of boys. /2
When boys express too many emotions or need too much connection we say to them, “What are you, a sissy? What are you, gay? What are you, a girl?” /3
Read 25 tweets
Mark Greene Profile picture
Aug 17, 2023
I have spent years in the trenches of social media, battling all manner of MRA, inches, extremists. It is an art form to respond in ways that are effective. I'm here to tell you that @barbiethemovie is the most powerful act of gender aikido that I have EVER seen on film. /1
The @barbiethemovie movie flips gender privilege over and over as a driver for men, (women and non binary folks') self reflection. -->Male viewers feeling like men are second class citizens in Barbieland? Felt it myself "Gee imagine life being like that every day... Oh, wait." /2
@barbiethemovie The central tenant of the film, that once we name the insane contradictions inherent in patriarchal "never good enough" roles for women... once the words are spoken clearly, women snap out of the trance of patriarchy. And I firmly believe many men will too. /3
Read 14 tweets

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