Are you having a day full of grumps? Time for some Very Lorge Bears

Time to intro the contestants in this year's #FatBearWeek
from explore.org/meet-the-bears

This is Chunk (32). You'll note Chunk is Very Hefty and has eaten the entirety of the salmon species. Image
This is Grazer (128)

Grazer has done an excellent job this year. Just look at that gut! It's filled with success! Image
This is Walker (151)

Walker is SO ROUND. Lookit that sphere of a booty! Image
This is 402. She's too shy for a full name, or even a body shot. It's ok 402, nobody's gonna pressure you until you feel body-positive enough on your own. Image
This is Holly (435)

Holly is a CHONKER. Look at that brilliance in bear performance! Such glorious fat folds! Truly she is going to be hard to beat. Image
It should be noted that Holly also had a spring cub, who's pretty round but nowhere near its mamma's majesty. It's ok little cub, you can do even better next year. Image
This is Otis (480)

He is LORGE and IN CHORGE and don't you dare try to take over his swimming hole. Everyone's gotta duck when he cannonballs in! Image
This is 719, a young adult bear who doesn't have a name yet. Be proud of her for being in the running for #FatBearWeek, even if she's the underdog. Or underbear. Image
This is 747, as in size-of-a-747.

That roundness goes in ALL DIRECTIONS and the silhouette is more blimp than airplane. Well done, 747! It takes dedicated training to eat as much as you have in prep for winter. Image
This is 812, and ngl when I first saw this pic I thought it was of 2 separate bears. THAT'S HOW BIG HE IS. LIKE THE SIZE OF A BEAR THAT ATE A WHOLE NOTHER BEAR. Definitely a contender. Image
This is 856.

He's got a good pear-shape going, towards that ideal lightbulb-esque bear form. Do you wanna pat that round bear bottom cuz I totally do Image
This is 909. She knows she's round but not yet sufficiently lorge, which is why she's standing at the top of this waterfall, just waiting for more fish. You can still do it, 909! Get chonky! Image
Voting for your favorite lorge bear for #FatBearWeek starts on the 30th, at explore.org/fat-bear-week

You can also learn more actual facts about these bears at explore.org/meet-the-bears

• • •

Missing some Tweet in this thread? You can try to force a refresh
 

Keep Current with Effie Seiberg wants you vaxxed,boosted, & masked

Effie Seiberg wants you vaxxed,boosted, & masked Profile picture

Stay in touch and get notified when new unrolls are available from this author!

Read all threads

This Thread may be Removed Anytime!

PDF

Twitter may remove this content at anytime! Save it as PDF for later use!

Try unrolling a thread yourself!

how to unroll video
  1. Follow @ThreadReaderApp to mention us!

  2. From a Twitter thread mention us with a keyword "unroll"
@threadreaderapp unroll

Practice here first or read more on our help page!

More from @effies

Nov 30, 2020
Telling a sick or disabled person "oh but you don't look sick" is actually really crappy and hurtful, even if you mean it as a compliment.

Let's talk about the reasons why.

1/
First of all, some background. Not every illness or disability is visible.

Some flare intermittently, some are never visible. Sometimes people are in incredible pain but don't show it because they're used to it, or just don't want to talk about it with you.

Lots of options.

2/
Autoimmune disorders, autonomic nerve disorders, digestive disorders... tons of conditions are only visible on the inside. And not everyone's going to show you the proof, because more often than not it's none of your business.

3/
Read 10 tweets
Sep 28, 2020
Every year I make a huge sculpted cake for a shared bday for me and my fiancé. This year, there's no point, because who's gonna come eat a huge cake in a pandemic?

So plan B is a pain-in-the-ass cake that's smaller.

Everyone please meet the (A Night At The) Opera Cake Opera cake with layers of almond joconde, French coffee butt
Opera cake is a Very French Cake that is rarely around because it's a hassle. It's alternating thin layers of coffee-syrup-soaked almond joconde sponge, French coffee buttercream, and chocolate ganache/glaze. Traditionally it has the word Opera written on it in chocolate cursive
When you bake the sponge it looks really sad. It's thin and pale, but that's how it's SUPPOSED to look. This sucker wants you to beat whole eggs and egg whites in 2 different bowls and if you only have 1 bowl that works with your mixer it's super fun.
Read 12 tweets
Sep 10, 2020
Do you need a break from the multi-pack of apocalypses happening right now?

It's time for a thread of... ANIMALS WITH BALLS. (No not like they can stand up to the man. Or like they haven't been neutered. Or like Cinderella-style parties.)

This doggo is having the BEST DAY EVER
This kitteh is ready for the WNBA with those dribblin skills.
This bebe panda has a ball and is never gonna give it up, never gonna put it down.
Read 18 tweets
Aug 25, 2020
Last month's #snackening was from Thailand.

This month is from Egypt! Let's goooooo

1/ Assortment of packaged snac...
These snacks were... less unique. Few new flavors, and no "this must be what Satan's asshole tastes like" flavors. Maybe bc I lived in Israel which has some similar flavors? Anyway, we did keep almost all of these for nomming post tasting, which is rare!

2/
First up, "crazy tomato" puffs!

Josh hates all things tomato (and I wish I'd taken a pic of his face on this). It kind of tasted and smelled like Campbell's instant tomato soup powder but in cheese puff form. Honestly, it worked for me! Salty and artificial tomato-y... yum.

3/ Blue and orange bag of &quo...Two "crazy tomato"...
Read 17 tweets
Aug 16, 2020
Y'all, we finished Legend of Korra and I'm honestly disappointed. No thematic resonance, no great earned catharsis. Shoulda just watched Last Airbender again instead.

Spoilers below, mute this tweet if you don't wanna see em.
1/
I'm super down for Korra being bi, and Asami was treated so terribly throughout the show (both by writers & other characters) that she deserves a happy ending dammit.

But like, you gotta develop their relationship to make the pairing feel right? And make em kiss you cowards.

2/
And DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED on how terribly Zhu Li was treated, and somehow her marrying Varrick was The Big Catharsis? For the whole show? When she didn't even have a character trait to speak of until s4? I'm sorry, whut?

3/
Read 6 tweets
May 6, 2020
Everything is terrible, so here's a thread of ANIMALS RIDING OTHER ANIMALS to brighten your feed.

We start with this epic Least Weasel (seriously that's its name) riding a whole damn woodpecker in flight!
Here's a very smol doggo riding a very lorge doggo in perfect doggo symbiosis
This very clever snail is riding this frog to get a speed boost. Just because the frog is sitting still doesn't mean it's not working!
Read 38 tweets

Did Thread Reader help you today?

Support us! We are indie developers!


This site is made by just two indie developers on a laptop doing marketing, support and development! Read more about the story.

Become a Premium Member ($3/month or $30/year) and get exclusive features!

Become Premium

Don't want to be a Premium member but still want to support us?

Make a small donation by buying us coffee ($5) or help with server cost ($10)

Donate via Paypal

Or Donate anonymously using crypto!

Ethereum

0xfe58350B80634f60Fa6Dc149a72b4DFbc17D341E copy

Bitcoin

3ATGMxNzCUFzxpMCHL5sWSt4DVtS8UqXpi copy

Thank you for your support!

Follow Us!

:(