So let’s chat about the take by some that if “you can’t afford kids don’t have them” so my parents both grew up poor then through education & training (mum nurse, father various ended up in advertising) able to afford a detached house 3 kids at private school. Then my dad left -
He saw no reason to “fund our lifestyle” (his kids) my brother was diagnosed with terminal heart & lung condition. My mum was struggling to keep things going. On one wage, hers. Now my father was a good Tory voter. Didn’t believe in the welfare state & “handouts” -
He turned my mum into a single mother, then my brother died. So he stopped paying my school fees . My mum was desperate for me to have consistency. Then he insisted the house be sold so he & his girlfriend could get half. He wasn’t on benefits, my mum didn’t bring it on herself.
There are many many reasons why people end up poor. Many many reason why kids are hungry. Many many reasons why mothers are raising kids alone. It can happen to anyone. If you think anyone owns their situation you don’t understand how life works & probably should learn a bit more
That’s not even including the grinding reality that not everyone escapes poverty in the first place. The reality of the stranglehold it places on your life chances. The truth of disability, illness, racism and misogyny are hugely influential, externally imposed preventions.
We’re not all the same. Where you start doesn’t have to be where you end up but it often is, because life isn’t a straightforward trajectory. We’re all of us just one illness or accident away from poverty. Without a safety net of some kind it could be permanent.

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More from @MrsNickyClark

25 Oct
Watching “Rebecca”. I’ve a DEEP attachment to the novel Daphne Du Maurier & original film Joan Fontaine, Laurence Olivier Judith Anderson, George Sanders (Hitchcock, come on) I am thoroughly enjoying the #Netflix version. Of course it strays from the book, so did my favourite.
I’ll bore you with my take once it’s done but feel thus far the criticism is overly harsh.
Kristen Scott Thomas was superb. Farcical scene with Rebecca’s medical records which gave the final section, which was rushed anyway, a Nancy Drew aspect which was a shame.
Read 4 tweets
23 Oct
The perfect storm was a brutal era of austerity, followed by a Universal Credit system with a baked in mandatory waiting period, followed by a global pandemic involving job losses. The government chose now to be stubborn over a £20 million scheme to feed hungry children at Xmas
It’s not just that it’s breathtakingly inhumane, it’s spectacularly bad politics and everyone except the government (and people who loathe a social security safety net) knows that.
Most people prefer messages that are easy to understand and this tweet from @angelaeagle is the best example of that. Nobody wants kids to be hungry, let alone over the holiday we are most emotional about.
Read 4 tweets
4 Sep
These two talented actors are aged 6 years apart. Hugh Grant at 59 looks as he naturally is, whereas Nicole Kidman at 53 is showing us “youth face”. Authenticity has never more important except for middle aged women & it’s sold to us as “empowerment”. #GenderedAgeism
From “Love Island” to Caitlin Moran’s new book the message is clear. On screen and in our collective consciousness, ageing is a female “disease to be cured”. Authenticity and diversity can and should exist everywhere, except it seems on a woman’s face. Even games, now “fix” women
That syringe takes normal lips and fills them with chemicals. It’s called “styling” but it isn’t. Girls as young as 14 are now so terrified of ageing that they’re seeking Botox. They see looking older as failure, they see authenticity as transgression.
Read 5 tweets
24 Aug
It’s my birthday tomorrow & I’m feeling a bit reflective so if you’ll permit the self indulgence of a woman much closer to 60 than to forty, I wanted to tell you a few things I’ve learnt. Scroll on if you’d rather, I understand the insignificance of a middle aged woman’s opinion.
Nothing you ever do will affect the lives of others more than your capacity to love & be loved. If you weren’t shown how then you can learn. You’ll get hurt, but nothing worthwhile is ever easy. Being hurt isn’t a justification to cause hurt. That’s an excuse not a reason.
“A family” my mum once told me “is whoever you find behind a front door”. Make yours a safe and happy one for you and everyone in it. (Even if that’s just you and a goldfish). There is no “one way” to do anything as long as it’s legal. Find a way that works for everyone, equally.
Read 9 tweets
1 Nov 19
In 2016 I was told an “assessment and treatment unit” (psychiatric hospital) was a Plan B for my severely learning disabled daughter. Her specialist school were expelling her because I found out they were using prone restraint on her.
bbc.com/news/education…
With no house no benefits and no care package in place we had only twelve weeks to get all this sorted. We had no help. We were desperate. I knew if Emily went into one of these places she’d never leave. There are NO council properties. Emily was by now 19. An adult.
Everything in place to help her was sourced by us. There were so many meetings so many people paid to support Emily. But Council houses, care packages & benefits cost money. Budget lines are easier to manage if young disabled adults who don’t vote get dumped in clinical prisons
Read 9 tweets

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