Thread by @zackferguson

So I fell into a bit of a Wikipedia hole last night, learning about all the human beings behind our favourite medical eponyms. Almost all of them - depressingly - are male, stale and pale.

Regardless, here are the most remarkable facts I could find about a few of them. (/THREAD)

Alois Alzheimer first presented his work on dementia at a
meeting in 1906. Unfortunately, he was scheduled to speak before a talk on compulsive masturbation. The crowd, pumped with anticipation for the headline act, ignored him entirely. They didn't even ask him any questions.

James Parkinson was (allegedly) involved in a plot to kill George III . His co-conspirators were only acquitted after the key witness mysteriously died. Parkinson remains the only doctor to give their name to a movement disorder AND work part time as an assassin.

Rudolf Virchow liked to antagonise the chancellor of Germany, who grew so irritated he challenged Rudolf to a duel in 1865. In a surreal take on Russian roulette, Virchow suggested they fight with sausages: one clean, the other infected with Trichinosis. The chancellor declined.

Robert James Graves was almost lost at sea. He stubbornly refused to let the crew abandon the sinking ship, blocking the only lifeboat with an axe and yelling "let us all be drowned together!" He then repaired the boat with leather from his own shoes, saving everyone on board.

William Osler once gave a speech where he suggested men should retire at 67 and be given a year to put their affairs in order, before being "peacefully extinguished by chloroform". He gets credit for his eponymous nodes, but sadly not for inspiring the plot of Logan's Run.

Guillaume Dupuytren was famous in his time for treating Napoleon Bonaparte's haemorrhoids. Some historians believe these same haemorrhoids distracted Napoleon and lost him the Battle of Waterloo. The Duke of Wellington may owe his victory to Guillaume's proctological failure.

Charles-Édouard Brown-Séquard claimed - at the age of 72 - to have rejuvenated himself sexually by injecting himself with monkey testicle extract. His advice led thousands of men to try the treatment. This is considered a seminal event in the history of endocrinology.

Thomas Addison retired due to depression and took his own life in 1860. I studied at Guys and only just learned this. A profound reminder that mental ill health among doctors - and our failure as a profession to recognise and support our struggling peers - is sadly nothing new.