Thread by @IanDunt

Here it comes again. The maaaaaaaaaze of choices. I'll be your guide through this labrarayntheeee.

I am aware btw that for anyone not watching CNN today, this account is going to seem very strange indeed.

I do not understand memes but it is mad to me that none of you have memed the shit out that ad.

It's happening again.

I have decided I do not want to watch First Move With Julia Chatterly.

Here it comes.

cmkfp'ndmowhtkcysh

Again. Fuck.

This is like the second season of Lost. I'm scared that if I don't watch the Quest Business ad every 15 minutes something terrible will happen.

Jesus, two Julia Chatterly ads in one ad break.

Honestly, Julia, it probably is too soon for an IPO. I'm calling it.

Shit no-one saw coming: the ad schedule being interrupted by commercials for Total Recall.

Shit just got real again. He's back.

"Today could very well be a decisive day," he says, two days since the election.

I love how nice the US news show hosts are to each other. "Great information, thank you. You've already got the slide up, I knew you would."

Earlier they were calling each other brother, which was a level of informality I was frankly unprepared for.

We should rename John King to King John.

Oh no. Ad break. Here it comes.

FUCK

I'll be you GUIDE through this labyrinth, and they'll never find your bones, no not one of them I tell you, for I shall have GROUND them into dust.

I've been watching for a long time and it is still annoying me that they're not saying maths properly.

I guess I'll never find out whether we are still in a bull market or how he find valuable assets to buy.

Guy please stop sending me the YouTube Quest Means Business thing because every time you do I have to watch it - I can't stop myself - and then I become more damaged

For the first time today, things are actually happening on CNN. They're good things - Biden lead increasing in Nevada - but it's not entirely clear to me that it was worth sitting through 458 Quest Means Business ads for this just yet.

This whole experience is really almost unsustainable - tense and yet very, very slow. It's like watching England in a World Cup final in bullet-time.

Fuck even is an IPO.

"That's a statement in all caps from the president right now". An entire era defined.

Odd kind of beauty to what you're seeing in the US. From the TV news hosts, to the local officials to the people counting: they're very clear & precise about the process, explaining it and protecting it.

All in the face of a president who is actively trying to undermine their democracy.

We're used to thinking of fights for democracy as all action and struggle. In fact you're seeing it here - in the quiet, patient, unfussy, workmanlike professionalism of those who undertake the work. GlLoriously, proudly boring.

Democracy merely fills in the gaps between maze adverts.

The missus is unimpressed with the maze advert. After watching me giggle at it for the 12,000th time she said: "You might be a moron."

She doesn't understand. Only those who have been through the epic emotional journey of 48 hours straight of maze adverts understand. Only they know what Quest really means.