David Cross spends several minutes of his most recent stand-up special "Oh Come On" imagining the various ways that Trump’s presidency could end.

“Will he be assassinated by a group of caring nuns?” he asks. The fantasies only get darker from there. trib.al/xftIewp
Now that it’s actually happening, @davidcrosss tells @mattwilstein on #TheLastLaugh podcast that he can’t bring himself to dance in the streets.

“I’m going to reserve it for when it’s actually good again.” trib.al/xftIewp
The pandemic isn’t exactly helping either.

“I tried two outdoor COVID-friendly shows and it just didn’t work,” Cross says. “I just have to wait to get back into those sweaty, basement, we’re-all-crammed-together Brooklyn bars to get the work done.” trib.al/xftIewp
Someone else he thinks is terrible? George W. Bush.

"That guy should be in jail and his Cabinet should be in jail," argues Cross. "Some of them were. People got pardoned and they’re criminals. And they directly paved the way for Trump." trib.al/xftIewp
Find out how @davidcrosss knew he could make it as a professional comic by listening to the rest of his interview on #TheLastLaugh with @mattwilstein here: trib.al/xftIewp

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More from @thedailybeast

19 Nov
EXCLUSIVE: Right before chairing the Subcommittee on SeaPower, Sen. David Perdue bought stock in BWX Technologies. After working on a bill that ultimately directed more Navy dollars to BWX, Perdue sold off the stock, earning tens of thousands in profits. trib.al/XkLTzUS
Perdue acquired up to $190,000 in BWX Technologies stock. The firm had lucrative contracts with the Navy to develop high-tech components for its nuclear submarine fleet—and they were looking to expand with the 2019 National Defense Authorization Act. trib.al/XkLTzUS
Perdue had a key role in shaping the final version of the NDAA, including securing a hefty $4.7 billion for Virginia-class submarines.

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17 Nov
NEW: Members of the Kappa Delta sorority at the University of Alabama are getting ready for a massive party that, in any other year, would be a routine event. But amid a deadly pandemic, residents are asking: Why are the school and city endorsing this? trib.al/ZbytpCR
“It’s appalling and dangerous,” 61-year-old radiation therapist Louise Manos told The Daily Beast, arguing that “the four members of the city council who voted in favor of this are sanctioning a superspreader event.” trib.al/ZbytpCR
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17 Nov
We all love a little Twitter drama, especially when it involves @MollyJongFast handing a QAnon politician-elect their ass
Apple: trib.al/lYg9zrD
Spotify: trib.al/nbBwLg2 Image
Today on @NewAbnormalPod Molly tells @TheRickWilson about the Twitter fight she had with Congresswoman-elect Marjorie Taylor Greene, an avowed QAnon supporter over government interference in a woman’s health
trib.al/5lavVF2 Image
After Greene tweeted “My body, my choice,” in reference to mask-wearing, Molly “suggested that she might also be pro-choice, which got her just enraged because while she won’t wear a mask, she does not want anyone to have control over their own uterus”
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17 Nov
EXCLUSIVE: Top Dems on the Senate intelligence and armed services committees are trying to stop one of President Trump’s White House attorneys, Michael Ellis, from taking over as the senior lawyer for the NSA, the Daily Beast has learned
trib.al/d5tfolZ
Not only was Ellis supposedly one of the aides who helped Rep. Nunes manufacture a surveillance “unmasking” scandal, he was implicated in moving to a classified server the record of Trump’s phone call with Zelensky—the one that helped get Trump impeached
trib.al/d5tfolZ
Maneuvering is underway to block Ellis’ appointment. Sens. Mark Warner and Jack Reed have written to the inspector general of the Defense Department, of which NSA is a component, demanding an investigation into Ellis’ installation.
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15 Nov
NEW: In this bonus episode of @NewAbnormalPod, New Yorker staff writer and author @mashagessen shares an unpopular opinion about the last election’s Russian interference
thedailybeast.com/masha-gessen-t…
Trump may be following Vladimir Putin’s autocratic playbook closer than we all realize—and the Russian interference was just the tip of the iceberg thedailybeast.com/masha-gessen-t…
“We've been very stupid to focus on it as much as we have,” Gessen explains. “The problem is not Russian interference, the problem is we sank so low to where Russian interference sank in.” thedailybeast.com/masha-gessen-t…
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14 Nov
NEW: On Friday, the remnants of Trump’s failed re-election campaign informed staff that they were putting an end to “voter fraud” hotline duty. It meant the death of a workspace that one senior campaign official described simply as “the room from hell.” trib.al/zL129Pq
According to three sources, the hotline was inundated by crank callers impersonating public figures, anti-Trump callers launching into vulgarity-laden tirades, pranksters making sounds of flatulence, and others issuing threats at Trump 2020 staffers trib.al/zL129Pq
For every three or four hours of threats and pranking endured, staff estimated that they’d get roughly one caller with an earnest, maybe-promising tip. Staff would often leave looking visibly upset, worn out, and feeling undervalued. trib.al/zL129Pq
Read 5 tweets

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