People were checking in on me making sure I'm eating. @IfeomaOzoma even reminded me to hydrate :) This is reminding me of how when I joined Google, I lost 10 pounds in less than a month because of the toxicity I immediately met./1
I used to joke that I had the Google -10 rather than the Google 15--most people say they gain weight when they join. Sexism at Brain was notorious in my whisper networks--didn't hear about racism tho because if you have no Black people you avoid that problem right?/2
I had a meeting first with Samy and then @JeffDean asking each of them what they were planning on doing about this and a number of other issues. I did not feel comfortable signing my offer because there were so many red flags--so many issues I saw even before joining./3
As far as I know I was the first Black woman ever to be hired as a research scientist there out of god knows how many RSs. And man was it toxic. Whenever I talked to my friends about the latest issue I was dealing with, ppl like @red_abebe would wonder why I was still there./4
Many times I would say well I don't want to abandon my team, or I promised so and so that I would stay at least for X months. (I also gave this answer to people who were trying to recruit me). /5
When I told stories to people outside of Google and saw their reactions, it reminded me that what I was experiencing was not supposed to be ordinary (the constant gaslighting and tone policing there is not intended to make you feel that way). /6
What happened with this paper and email is just the tip of the iceberg. So many things have happened culminating in this incident.
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