Thread by @ayshakhoury

My pastoral counselor reminded me that “people don’t know the weight of their own stories”. So here is part of mine. On August 28, I had the most profound moment in my career as an educator. It was the 57th anniversary of the #MarchonWashington and #EmmetTill ‘s death. 1

I was asked by my Institution to incorporate the topics of bias and racial health disparities in my fundamentals of medicine class. I made the decision to show up fully as a Black woman in medicine. We had a candid discussion on racism in society, acknowledging what the day 2

Represented and how that shows up in medicine: under and conversely over representation, poor health outcomes (Black maternal health, extrajudicial murder by police) and ultimately 3

Hoping that my students understood that we carry the weight of medicine’s history of racism and bias with us regardless of their individual backgrounds. Medicine cannot be compartmentalized from what is happening in society. It was an incredible and emotional conversation. 4

After class I felt at odds. I’d never been so vulnerable and open with students and immediately had a #panicattack 2 of my colleagues helped me through it and I went home early to rest. Later that night after hearing of #chadwickboseman ‘s death, I was told that I was suspended 5

Can you still call yourself an educator and a physician if you have no students or patients? I knew I’d be a doctor in 5th grade and by 11th grade that I’d teach. At 41, both were taken from me, but I learned that I am a physician and educator at heart. No one can take that. 6

In October, my physician role was reestablished and in my naïveté thought, I would be returning to the school. Their investigation is ongoing and tomorrow will make it 15 weeks. I wouldn’t change what I said in class. #Blackwomen have earned our voices and our stories! 7

#MedTwitter you’re training in the midst of a pandemic and a new awakening of racism in America. Compartmentalization of what you and your patients experience in society cannot be separated from the clinical experience. Find mentors who will help you realize all you want to be. 8

There is so much that can be done outside of Medicine. Use your voices to augment the marginalized. Start an antiracim journey. End racism in medicine. 9

Thank you for sharing my story. I moved from Atlanta for this position and it’s been a nightmare.

Please retweet and augment my voice. Thank you for sharing my story. 10