Thread by @mrmacaronii

Omo! I just had the most relieving shit of my life inside the bush!!
Goodness!!! I am so relieved!!
Haaa!!! Na when I shit finish I dey ask myself; how did this happen?

So, I took a quick break yesterday from @tkelani ‘s Movie Set of AYINLA to come attend @Official1960Bet ‘s event in Lagos.
The plan was to get back to Abeokuta as early as possible this morning.
Before I slept, I treated myself to some nice fish, chips and fruits salad. 🌚

So woke up around 6 ooo.. prepared and started my journey.
Traffic dey Lagos Ibadan expressway so I followed Otta...
Bad road of course! From one pothole to another. 🙄 all of a sudden my stomach started to turn. Haaa!

I started sweating from inside.
I turned off the music. I turned off the AC!!
I wind down small...
I got to one busy U-turn!! Some boys saw me!!!
‘Haaa! Ooin!! Na that guy be this nau.. freaky freaky... ‘
I faked a smile...
dem surround car 🤦🏾‍♂️

I called the one that seemed like their Leader!! I was almost in tears at this point.
‘ Omo Iya mi, joor mo fe Yagbe!! ‘
He shouted!!
‘Haaa, Alaye fe yagbe ni sha ‘ all of them started shouting and deliberating on where to take me..
It was taking too long.... 🤦🏾‍♂️

I called him back and gave him money. I zoomed off!!!
At this point I had gotten to express where road was good.
At some point, I go speed, another point I go slow down...
Na the shit dey control me!! 😩😩
Omo, Na so I see one big church ooo.. I parked!!!

I saw one man in front. I was so happy!!! I said Ejor baba mi!! Mo fe ya gbe ni ( I wanna take a shit )...
He smiled and said sorry that how am I feeling exactly??
What is this sir??? I wan shit you dey ask me how I am feeling...
Guess what?? The church wasn’t even opened ooo!!

Just then, one young man saw me and came to meet us.. he said I should follow him that there is a pit latrine somewhere near. I followed him and bros was taking me inside bush.
I felt somehow and just as I was about speaking, I saw the pit latrine. Well fenced for that matter.

He asked if he should help me bring water? I said no.. cos I took along a bottle of water! I said God bless u.
Na so I pull jeans..........
burukatamakapokotokofokoyayapaputuputuputyuuuu........
2 seconds!!!!!

Omo!!! I finished and I was full of gratitude to God!!! Haaaa!
I went back to look for the boy.
I saw him. He smiled at me... I smiled back!! Full teeth! 😂
I asked what he was doing there.. he said he came to see his mother...

His mum stays there but he is from PH.... he just finished learning furniture work.
Oh well, God sent me to him as he also sent him to me...
I’m back in Abeokuta completing the part 2 of my shit before I go back on set.
The End 😁