It's the last day of this dumpster fire known as 2020
Let's recap some shenanigans - #Ward45 sure had plenty

In January, Jimmy called out The Crew at Copernicus 
A photo bomber, a bounty, and the mayor visited us

The Point is resurrected in February - now ten storeys instead of 10
A firetruck can’t make a turn and Cuyler Plaza meets its end
Jimmy shows how tough he is and takes a stand against graffiti
A vigilante video offering a hundred-dollar bounty
March first Jimmy does the polar plunge with Team Alderbear
And barely wins committeeman - his enormous signs everywhere

In April Willie Wilson donates masks, Jimmy hands out burgers Epically
He can't seem to figure out how to wear a mask properly
In May at the little free library we meet (with complements) Al Chemist
Jimmy patrols the ward from the threat of antifa activitists
It’s June and Jimmy is hiding behind his office
While constituents march for racial justice
“Where’s Jim Gardiner” the crowd chants
Asked if he believes Black lives matter by a Black man
Jim doesn’t answer, instead just deflects
A defining cowardly moment - one we won’t forget
July we brought our trash cans inside so garages weren't burned by fireworks
Jimmy used CFD for park clean up, and gets caught when trying to lurk
He's also mad this month about an overturned porta loo
If it can be proven - but only if - he’s in favor of removing Columbus' statue
August is a memorable month – who can forget the Axident?
I mean, really, what’s the big deal about few more scratches and dents?
Power outages and cleanup from the winds of the Derecho
The month ends with a "heroic" save from a predatory Lincoln Tow

In September Jimmy backs the blue (maskless) at a Trump rally 
And unveils a brand new flood-free $225,000 alley
Some romantic personal news in October that Jimmy doesn't share
A secret wedding to the mayor's Senior Advisor of Intergovernmental Affairs

Jimmy dressed up like Bernie for the Trick or treat drive through
If you called the Democratic Committeeman Jim claimed he didn't know who
November - Jim’s on a Zoom and keeps asking for someone to unmute
Then surprise! He and Charles are served with a lawsuit
And we can’t say for certain, because we don’t actually know
But it’s possible he had someone throw a brick though a window
December brought the final vote to complete the SSA coup
We learned about apparent voter fraud by the guy at City News 
Jim killed another development because the NIMBYs complained about density
And it turned out defendent Jim won't be represented by the City
So many things happened throughout this year
Like Copernicus trying to steal the firehouse from Lake Effect Beer

But this thread would never end if I recounted every deed of Jim and his miscreants
It’s been a hell of a year, let’s put it behind us, and hope 2021 brings some indictments
@threadreaderapp this thread is a bit out of control
Would you mind sending a link to unroll?

• • •

Missing some Tweet in this thread? You can try to force a refresh

Keep Current with Tired🥱Noxious

Tired🥱Noxious Profile picture

Stay in touch and get notified when new unrolls are available from this author!

Read all threads

This Thread may be Removed Anytime!


Twitter may remove this content at anytime! Save it as PDF for later use!

Try unrolling a thread yourself!

how to unroll video
  1. Follow @ThreadReaderApp to mention us!

  2. From a Twitter thread mention us with a keyword "unroll"
@threadreaderapp unroll

Practice here first or read more on our help page!

More from @BlondeNoxious

31 Oct 20
Listen my friends and I'll tell you a tale
Of an abandoned firehouse and a ten dollar sale

Far away in Jeff Park by Copernicus Center
Where NIMBYs love parking and hate on the renters

Stands an old firehouse full of asbestos
Flood damage, lead paint, and probably fungus
Vacant and crumbling for over eight years
But finally some good news involving some beers 🍻

A plan to remediate, renovate, restore
Nine apartments, @LakeEffect_LLC on the first floor

After years working its way through the City
Finally approval from DPD and Zoning Committee
Final sale price ten dollars, yes 1,000 cents
Appraised value minus remediation equals zero - make sense?

But when word got out about this deal
Someone nearby got all up in their feels

In 2018 Copernicus submitted a proposal
For six apartments and restaurant (chain - not local)
Read 9 tweets

Did Thread Reader help you today?

Support us! We are indie developers!

This site is made by just two indie developers on a laptop doing marketing, support and development! Read more about the story.

Become a Premium Member ($3/month or $30/year) and get exclusive features!

Become Premium

Too expensive? Make a small donation by buying us coffee ($5) or help with server cost ($10)

Donate via Paypal Become our Patreon

Thank you for your support!

Follow Us on Twitter!