Relapse is part of the recovery process. Every time you resolve to quit and succeed in abstaining for any length of time, you’re building up a skill set that will eventually allow you to quit for good, or at least for longer every time. It’s not failure, because failure is final.
Obviously that’s not a reason to allow yourself to relapse. Relapse still fucking sucks and always makes the next stage of the process that much harder. But it is a process—sobriety isn’t a state that you achieve at some point and then that’s it. It’s a constant struggle.
Honestly if you never relapse then it probably wasn’t an addiction. People who’ve never been addicted have no fucking idea how hard it is to quit—they literally can’t even imagine it, so don’t judge yourself by their standards of how your recovery should be going.
Instead of judging yourself for relapsing, try to listen to what your behavior is trying to tell you. Obviously something wasn’t working, and you probably need stronger supports in your life. Learn from it and be curious about why you relapsed: why now, why here, why in that way?
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