Yesterday, I got a private message on Instagram from a 19yo queer feminist. She said she wasn't sure she wanted me to reply, just that she wanted me to read her words. She reminded me of 19yo me and I am still thinking about her words. 
I posted the above in the hope that she would see it. And I am thinking of writing an open letter to her - no identifying characteristics at all - in which 19yo me has a conversation with her.
She said she lives in a country not too far from Egypt. I found the word "feminism" from books in my university library in Saudi Arabia. It gave a word and practice for what I already was since age 15.
In reflecting on her words, I am thinking of power/lessness of being 19.
In reflecting on her words, I am thinking of power/lessness of being 19.
She's made me wonder what I would say to my 19yo self, exhilarated & terrified by the feminist texts I was reading. I would go to them in the library every day, read a bit, get scared, put them down, return the next day. I knew I was pulling a thread that would unravel everything
And I am still unraveling!
Not for all the money in the world would I ever want to be 19 again, but I am so grateful to that 19 year old who returned daily to confront her fears about the fight ahead. It continues.
And I'm so grateful to the 19yo whose message reminded me.
Not for all the money in the world would I ever want to be 19 again, but I am so grateful to that 19 year old who returned daily to confront her fears about the fight ahead. It continues.
And I'm so grateful to the 19yo whose message reminded me.
Ultimately, I want her to know that I wish I knew her when I was 19 years old so that the two of us could have plotted and planned together.
So I will remember myself at 19 and write an open letter fueled with love for us both.
So I will remember myself at 19 and write an open letter fueled with love for us both.
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