The idea that rape is a product of “sexual temptation” stems from a toxic relationship to sexuality.
If you believe that sexual attraction is an overwhelming animal urge that requires a Herculean level of self-control granted only by prayer and spiritual maturity, then it’s easy to believe that ppl (in particular cisgender men) are constantly on the verge of raping other ppl.
In this worldview, *not* raping ppl becomes a virtue unto itself. If sexual attraction is always & only ever compelling people to sexually devour each other, then *not* raping ppl is a sign of self-control!
This is why whenever the latest rape and/or sexual abuse coverups come out in the church, Christian men are quick to say of the perpetrator, “This could have been any of us,” meaning any of them could be rapists!
In many churches, Christians learn that their sexuality exists like some kind of monstrous alter ego, ever threatening to take over and devour the people they love. The only way to reign in the monster is through “spiritual accountability” and getting married.
Therefore, if you happen to be going through a season of “spiritual backsliding” or your marriage happens to be on the rocks (or maybe you’re not married at all), you’re likely to succumb to the alter ego & transform into a sex monster in moments of “spiritual weakness.”
In this worldview, everyone is a rapist. It’s just a matter of who is able to keep their inner rapist in check through spiritual strength and a fulfilling marriage.
Human sexuality is a social-emotional experience that draws us into *relationship* with other people. It does not inevitably compel us into a predestined sexual encounter unless we manage to control the “urge.”
Human sexuality draws us into *relationship* with others, and *we decide* what kind of relationship we want it to be. It does not compel us into sexual encounters. It draws us into *relational encounters,* and we make of that relationship what we choose.
When cisgender men rape other people, it is not because they “fell.” They aren’t “falling.” They are choosing. There is no monster compelling them to do it. It is themselves and only themselves.

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More from @TravelingNun

5 Feb
“How can you be gay & celibate & not inherently self-hating?”

I get asked this question a LOT. People assume that the only reason a gay person would be celibate is internalized homophobia.

But they’re wrong.
Gay people can be celibate for all kinds of reasons.

Maybe they just don’t like sex very much and don’t particularly want to have it. Yes, it’s possible to have a sex drive and experience sexual attraction but still not enjoy having sex.
Or maybe they’re just asexual and don’t experience sexual attraction in the first place. Yes, gay people can be asexual and asexual people can be gay.
Read 13 tweets
18 Nov 20
I’m celibate. I follow historic Christian teaching on sexual ethics by default. Straight people who practice contraceptive sex don’t.
A lot of ppl get angry when I make this observation. They feel like they’re being judged. Like I’m telling them that they’re living in sin just for having sex with someone they love. That’s interesting, because it reminds of how gay ppl feel.
To be clear, I’m NOT saying that you’re living in sin for having contraceptive sex with your spouse, so no worries. I don’t think you’re living in sin! Birth control is a human right, & denying access to contraceptives leads to horrendous abuses, most often toward women.
Read 24 tweets
12 Sep 20
“If you don’t vote in this election it’s because you’re a selfish, privileged elite who can’t understand the needs of the oppressed.”

This is a bald-faced lie fabricated (ironically) by political elites in order to bully other ppl into voting. [thread]

The older richer & whiter you are the more likely you are to vote. There’s a multitude of reasons for this but most pertinent is that ppl are more likely to feel represented by our two-party political system if they are older richer & whiter.…

Non-voters are more likely to be poor, less educated, and non-white. Surveys of low-income and POC citizens report high levels of voter disengagement due to feeling unrepresented in politics and the belief that voting won’t make a difference.…
Read 13 tweets
24 Aug 20
Have you wept over the death of someone killed by the police in your immediate circle?
I have.
Have you stared into the haunted eyes of a child whose father/mother/family was arrested last night?
I have.
Have you wiped the tears of a young person whose father is sitting in prison?
I have.
Read 19 tweets
18 Jul 20
This is a huge problem I’ve noticed at BLM protests. White ppl expressing outsized rage (which really doesn’t make sense...their job is to be the allies not to be the angry ones) & POCs tasked with reigning them in.
At many protests I’ve attended, white people are the ones shouting things like “fuck the police” while POCs are the ones trying to get more positive messages out and gaining traction, eg: chanting “This is what community looks like”
I’ve also seen white people interfere in conversations between POCs, as the cop in the video described, when that is just not their place to do.
Read 6 tweets
26 Jun 20
“I was a druglord & gangbanger...”

“I was sleeping around w/ men just playing the whore....”

“I was a homosexual sex addict....”


Few things do more to reinforce dominant cultural pathologies than the Christian Testimony™
The function of these types of testimonies is to reinforce things like racism, sexism, and homophobia while simultaneously exoticizing the “sinful lifestyle” to make the person’s present-day self-righteousness look “cool”
Those w/ power appropriate the stories of people like this and turn them into ornamental “proofs” that the straight, white, cisgender, middle-class way of life w/ men in charge is the “Christian Life” & the only way your life should look after Jesus
Read 9 tweets

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