Thread by @luuuunadiane

svsss shen twins au where shen yuan, knowing that lbh is hunting down shen jiu to kill his scummy shizun, decides to pose as his twin brother and be killed in his stead to fake shen jiu's death

and lbh's psyche shatters when he discovers he's killed his beloved yuan-ge

when shen yuan regains consciousness again, it's in the middle of an array of blood, lbh's eyes glowing red and face flecked with blood "shizun, shizun?" and shen yuan instinctively says - "binghe?" making lbh grin in gleeful, desperate, manic relief before hugging him

"you came back to me, shizun!" and sy looks down to find his wrists shackled - wrists of hands callused with years of training, in a body that feels lighter, firmer, stronger,

"why did you leave me?" lbh demands, gripping sy's shoulders, "why did you pretend to be that scum?"

"give me a mirror, binghe."
"why did you save him?"
"binghe, give me a mirror, now!"
"you have the healthy body you now deserve, shizun." lbh simpers, confirming sy's worst fears. "but how could you give up your life for him?

"he was my brother!" sy exclaims,

shoving lbh away, staring in horror at the callused fingers and palms he used to take in his own bony hands, and as lbh's eyes narrow at him, sy knows he's said the wrong thing.

"is that why," lbh begins darkly, "why you stepped aside? why you let him do as he pleased?"

sy moves back as lbh advances towards him, the words striking him in his guilt, he saw the way sj treated lbh, he knew how wrong it all was, but he...he hadn't done enough, had he-

lbh knows he is being unfair to sy, who shielded him as much as he could, encouraging him, caring for him, teaching him, berating sj, but still, lbh can't help but think all this time that sy would take sj's side due to their blood relation, despite all sj had done.

The horror and the trauma of the endless abyss that he had to endure, all because of sj's actions upon discovering his demonic heritage - sy wasn't there, too weak to attend the immortal alliance conference, but if only things were different, if only-

if only shizun had chosen him, inside of his twin brother, whom he had chosen to give up his life in exchange for that piece of scum.

"I'm sorry," sy says, and lbh can see and hear and feel the remorse in his face and voice, "I'm sorry I didn't do more."