Thread by @SecretGamerGrrl

You know what, let's sit here a moment and talk about the harassment I receive on a daily basis as a trans woman. This isn't about broad trends, this is focused on me, and I want everyone who sees it to retweet this whole thread far and wide.

I have a policy to never post or let

others post photographs or videos of me on the internet. This is a policy I have in place because since mid-2014, I have had neo-nazis constantly plotting to murder me, and not knowing what I actually look like, or where I live, makes for a pretty sizable barrier to their efforts

Being frustrated by this, and the various other ways that I really am entirely too boring to make for an engaging stalking target, several of these nazis set up a website they make up all kinds of ridiculous nonsense about me, and fill it with "photos they've collected" which are

just random fat bearded men from, so far as I can tell, just random image searches. Not only do none of them look at all like me (a rather unremarkable beardless woman), they don't even look a thing like each other.

That much does not particularly bother me, because hey, it's

going to absolutely ruin their SEO if any photos of what I actually look like ever do leak out there and someone would have to be both a ridiculous bigot AND the most gullible chump in the world to believe I actually look like any of those.

Like this guy! archive.is/s6mFB

That's an archived post from the website of a creep who's been pretty relentlessly stalking me for coming up on seven years now. He used to send me weird flirty messages about "wanting to protect me from bullies," then became for a few years the most recognizable and most extreme

anti-trans bigot in the world (only recently losing the title to Rowling), and at some point, years after I blocked him, stumbled across that nazi website with its "photos of the real me" and stories about me being a secret nazi ringleader who plans bombings and has cooties or

whatever this week's fanfiction is. And again, having that super rare mix of bigoted brain rot and being just the biggest mark in the world, totally bought into that, presumably vomited all over himself from all the impure thoughts of what he used to imagine I looked like, and

started ranting and raving about his new mental image to anyone who would listen, citing it in interviews with neo-nazi podcast hosts (I would STRONGLY advise using a private window to follow these links) for changing his position on... murdering my pets.

Wait, sorry, that interview doesn't actually explicitly state that he's talking about me. That's not really fair of me.

This one on the other hand absolutely does.


As do many many others. This is kinda just what he's been doing since being banned from

Twitter. Just... going on far-right talk shows to ramble incoherently about... his mental image of me as a fat bearded man, and how the tip of said beard he imagines I have might interact with the genitals he images I have.

Just imagine being in my shoes there. Imagine being the

woman who has to deal with a stalker not only shouting that kind of raving incoherent slander to anyone who will listen, but that the people who do listen also film him and upload it to youtube.

And that this same creep gets interviewed by the damn BBC. pinknews.co.uk/2020/02/24/gra…

And hey remember how surreal it was a few years ago to have a couple people actually addressing Congress and the U.N. to talk about how much weird hateful crap they were getting for having once dated a nazi and posting feminism 101 youtube videos respectively?

The reason I have

those links on hand is because this coming week, this disgusting foulmouthed stalker is slated to speak before the freaking House of Lords "about free speech," where presumably he will be explaining to a large number of lords and baronesses how unfair it is that Twitter won't let

him have an account anymore to send me dick pics with or harass random celebrities about how he totally has pictures that "prove I'm not really a woman and also I'm ugly" or whatever. So it was suggested to me that I let them know who he actually is in an e-mail.

Do you get how

absolutely surreal this is?

Normally, when a woman has a stalker this creepy, vulgar, and detached from reality, that woman is a big celebrity, and has a publicist booking round the clock security details, and a lawyer taking the creep to court over every filthy lie he's spewing

and tons of media outlets come rushing out to talk her up like a saint for having to deal with that, grant her dozens of soft-focus interviews to talk about it, start freaking charitable organizations in her name, and offer her a book deal. Hell I've seen all that happen when the

target is a complete unknown, and for way tamer crap than this.

Meanwhile, what do I get? I've got a social media life where absolutely no harassment is ever clearcut or vulgar enough to even get a slap on the wrist, and like 3 dozen impersonator accounts roam free. I get police

refusing to investigate suspicious packages or armed people trying to break into my apartment. I get leaders of anti-harassment/discrimination organizations misgendering me and refusing to denounce baseless accusations of unspeakable crimes, or just outright putting out hits on

nazi stalker reddit. I'm blacklisted out of ever getting anything printed anywhere. I can't even get a sympathetic call from a family member when this crap gets to a point where I can barely go on living. And of course no one will hire me so I'm constantly having to scramble and

beg just to pay my rent. Plus of course I have stress so high I haven't been able to keep any food down for the last couple days here, which is just excellent when I'm on medications I need to take with food that prevent me from just dropping dead.

And the real kicker is this

celebrity stalker slandering me in interviews isn't even in the top 5 of bigoted creeps who've spent the better part of the last decade making it their personal mission in life to bring suffering to me, specifically. Not even getting into the ones trying to legislate me to death.

And again, this is all getting directed at me, an unemployed woman in her late 30s just spending her time alone in the middle of nowhere trying to make sure I can afford cat food and struggling to watch a movie now and then when I can't afford any sort of cable/streaming service.

And of course the worst part of all this isn't the stalking. It's the complete apathy from everyone around me. Just really hammers it home that I'm never actually seen as an actual human being anyone ever needs to consider in any way.

As this whole thing seems to be doing the sort of numbers where people start getting gossipy with it, a reminder:

That one IT Crowd episode- 2008
Weird friendliness towards me- 2015
Getting in bed with transphobes- 2016
Calling me a man in interviews- 2019

Please don't start in

with narratives where the reason he became such an intense bigot is that I "spurned his affections" or whatever. I understand that that's a more fun story to tell, but it is plainly not what happened, and more importantly it's a fictional narrative that casts me as the villain.

I have, on MANY occasions now, had people rewrite history like that, taking away the agency of the man who just decided to start being a bigot one day of his own free will, and paint him as the victim of me the haughty trans woman who made a powerful enemy for herself by refusing

to lower myself to sleeping with him. Misogyny is a hell of a drug.

And while I'm correcting false narratives on this, it's also probably worth noting that at no point in the history of my having this account have I ever been anything other than fully open about being trans, AND

pretty damn public about the whole transition process.

So, not only does Linehan there to this day not have a clue what I actually look like, but he was camped out in my DMs back in the era when my transition gripes were all about getting access to HRT and hair removal, not when

I was griping about getting wolf whistles from strangers and not being able to find a bra in size 45E or whatever ridiculous number it is I'm trying to keep strapped down lately. So uh, make of THAT what you will.