Thread by @CSakwah

STORY THREAD

A young rich couple once wanted their home cleaned but they were very broke to afford a cleaning company at that moment. They came up with a plot to have their home cleaned without spending a dime.

Sitting in my bedsitter in Huntus, Kasarani, one evening, I didn’t know that I was the guy to clean their home in Membley Estate. That evening, a lady I had been trying to woo on Facebook eventually replied to my inbox in an encouraging manner.

Initially, I did not believe how she suddenly escalated our chat into inviting me to her home in Membley the following day for a day of coitus. Unsuspecting of her ploy, I finally fell into her trap and paid her home a visit.

Upon arriving, she was quick to reiterate that she was a single mother who had worked hard to build her home and wealth. Her home was cozy, a stand-alone residential place in an affluent neighborhood along the Bypass. We barely wasted time.

She claimed to be suffering from a chronic deficiency of coitus. So was I.
She got cozy, and I grew comfortable in the house until thirty minutes later when her doorbell rang. Her face turned edgy abruptly.

She walked to the door, peeped through a door hole, and came back to the living area looking like she had seen a dead man standing outside the door.
‘My husband, it is my husband!’ She said, almost crying in distress. ‘What shall we do? What shall we do? What shall we do?

My husband is a military officer.’ She asked repeatedly. The doorbell rang again.
What shall we do? A military officer? Let us just commit suicide? At least for me, let me commit suicide - I thought.
‘I thought you said…’

‘I thought he would be out for at least a week on a peace-keeping mission in those cattle rustling communities. We don’t have time, please. Pretend like you were cleaning the house.’ The doorbell rang again. ‘A minute, babe!’ she shouted from the living area.

In a minute, she brought me a broom, a mopper, a mopping bucket, and a window squeegee, and other house cleaning paraphernalia found in high-end homes. ‘Start with the windows,’ she said, strengthened her dress and her hair, and hurriedly walked to open the door.

They hugged and kissed at the door, as I watched. Upon seeing me, in a surprised tone, the man asked, ‘and, babe, who is this guy?’ The man was dressed in military regalia. I was scared, the scene was scary. What had sent me inside a military man’s home?

‘Ohh, this is the cleaning guy. Remember we needed someone to clean and tidy up our home?’ Jeniffer asked in a more composed tone than a few seconds earlier.
‘Ohh yea. I thought you would get a cleaning company instead of one person.’

‘Actually, Mama Abby recommended the guy. Says he did a great cleaning job back at her home.’
‘Ohh great, I hope he will weed our flower gardens and mow the grass lawn as well.’
‘Of course, he will. Ama?’ She asked me.

Out of fear, and the guilty of being found in another man’s house, I agreed to all charges. ‘Yes. I can do any home-related cleaning, it is what I do for a living,’ I replied.
‘Great.’ The man said.

‘Babe, I thought we agreed that you won’t be coming home with your military uniforms? What happened?’ Jeniffer asked her husband.
‘I did not have the energy to drive to the camp to change my clothes.’
‘Where were you?’

‘We drove from Rift Valley towards our camp. Before we got there.Kiptoo called us to rush to his home.Can you imagine Kiptoo walked into his home and found a man in bed with his wife?And when he confronted the man, he pulled a gun from his pocket and shoot Kiptoo before escaping.

We have been manhunting him.’
‘What about the wife?’ She asked.
‘She ran away as well, but it was the man that we wanted. Men who sneak into other men’s house to have sex with other people’s wives don’t deserve to live!’ He said with a lot of anger.

‘He shot Kiptoo. We had to kill him. He deserved to die.’
‘Yes, he deserved to die,’ I muted. My voice was dry. I was trembling. That guy had shot a guy whom they had found inside his colleague’s house? At that time, I didn't know that they had cooked the story to scare me.

And I was scared as a boy walking back home at night after escorting a lady to her home. I scrubbed and swabbed the windows harder.
He pulled his wife towards their bedroom where I heard him vaccinating her against her chronic deficiency of coitus.

Meanwhile, as they made love, I cleaned the windows, mopped the floors, swept floors, weeded their flower beds, and mowed their small grass lawn. For a moment, I thought about escaping by climbing over the parameter wall,

then I remembered the man narrating how they had launched a spirited manhunt for that guy. In the evening, I reported to him that I was done with my work. The job was very exhausting, both mentally and physically.

I expected some kind of payment apart from the evening tea that they offered me. After the tea, he pretended to reach his wallet, only for the lady to stop him. ‘I paid him before the work.’ I stood there, tired, frustrated, regretting, and angry.

I felt violated and abused but I could not complain out of fear. What if I complained and the man, later on, came to learn that I had paid his home a visit not to clean the home but to shag his wife? I walked out of the home without complaining.

Months later, the lady apologized and confessed that I was a victim of their ploy to have someone clean their home. 'I was against that idea. My husband pushed me into it. I picked you because you had tried to hit on me in my inbox before.' She said while doing my utensils.