Thread by @NaomiKritzer

"Send us the shrimp tails so we can confidently state (again) they're not shrimp tails, then dispose of the evidence."

https://twitter.com/CTCSquares/status/1374408643848798212

There's a bit in my novel CATFISHING ON CATNET about crisis PR. In the story, Steph hacks an "instructional robot" so that instead of delivering the planned sex ed unit, the robot is just handed over to the AI character, who answers EVERYONE'S questions rather colorfully.

This makes the local news, then spreads nationally, and the communications director of the robotics company finds himself in front of cameras trying to explain that it's the school's fault for not installing a security patch.

Rachel, who's befriended Steph, comments that this guy is a terrible PR guy and the firm is going to deeply regret not calling a crisis management firm.

Two years earlier, she explains, the food manufacturing facility in their town (which makes granola bars) had salmonella contamination:

"My mom's friend Wendy works at the factory doing communciations stuff, which meant running a cute Twitter feed about granola bars and breakfast cereal and writing news releases....

...After the salmonella contamination happened, she got pulled up in front of cameras and said 'Nobody's perfect.' ... They hired a crisis firm and sent Wendy to the mail room for six months."

Steph asks if she ever got her job back?

"Yeah, she's pretty good at writing funny tweets. Also, the salmonella totally wasn't our fault! It was a supplier!"

So yeah, anyway, if my fictional teenagers can tell you when you need a crisis management firm, Cinnamon Toast Crunch, y'all are overdue for making that phone call.