Anxiety is your brain worrying what COULD happen.

When you run away, your brain learns that situation is definitely to be feared, and that running away helps. You build a worse pattern.

Facing your fear shows your brain what ACTUALLY happens. That diminishes your anxiety.
There are obviously limits to this.

If your anxiety is about a genuinely dangerous situation, use common sense.

And make sure you’re healthy enough to do this. Ptsd in particular makes this difficult due to the rapid shift in the limbic system.

This may be a goal to work up to
But your brain is a learning computer. It does what it can with the data you feed it.

If your brain is irrationally afraid of yellow socks, it could be that enough encounters will yellow socks will make the fear response extinct.

Or fear of riding the bus. Or of confrontation.
What data are you feeding your brain?

What data are you preventing your data from acquiring?

Is your standard anxiety response keeping your brain afraid?

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More from @TheBrometheus

29 Mar
Constant apologizing drains those around you.

"Sorry you have to put up with me!" The first time, people comfort you. The second time makes them tired. After that, it becomes exhausting.

Stop apologizing. Thank instead.

"Thank you for being so patient."

Practice gratitude.
Constant apologizing repels people as you suck away their emotional energy. "No, it's totally fine... really... please stop apologizing..." 🙄 Would you want to keep spending energy on someone who exhausts you?

But gratitude energizes people. Appreciation draws them in.
If you spend all your time apologizing, shift instead of gratitude. Find reasons to thank and compliment.

"Thank you for your patience today. You were an excellent teacher."

Avoid the urge to self-deprecate. "Thanks for being patient with my slow learning. I know I'm an idiot."
Read 7 tweets
17 Mar
Today I'm working on my Savage Hunters series. It has suffered a long and troubled road.

I'll thread about it here for anyone interested in the process a writer follows in learning and designing an ongoing series.
I started writing this series in 2018 for my niece. I wanted to write fantasy pulp novels, and I was inspired by games like Monster Hunter to make stories about primitive tribes battling gigantic beasts. I also wanted to write for my young niece who loves games.
Writing specifically for female readers was on my heart because my niece was growing up in a world with a lack of morality tales. She loved to read, but what could I buy for her? Everything YA seemed to be about sex and drugs and more sex, plus sex on top of that.
Read 15 tweets
17 Feb
The Fraternity of Excellence has been closed to new members. But their doors are open for the next 48 hours.

This is an exclusive group designed from the ground-up for husbands, fathers, and all men serious about building for the long term.

FAQ thread: fraternityofexcellence.com
"This group is just for men? Do they hate women?"

No, the Fraternity of Excellence is extremely pro-family and rejects anti-female sentiment. This is a space designed for men to learn from each other and embrace the healthy strengths unique to men, the same as all-women groups.
"Are you paying for a group of friends?"

No, the membership fee is the hurdle to keep out the unmotivated who refuse to put skin in the game. Membership grants access to a host of experts and professionals in a range of fields ready to educate and support men in all arenas.
Read 7 tweets
4 Feb
Most men have absolutely no idea how to talk to their wife.

Their wife says, “Talk to me!” and he answers, “What am I supposed to say?”

Women develop emotional intimacy through talking. Men don’t know how to do this.

Here’s a thread on communicating intimately with your wife:
Women tend to be happiest when they feel USEFUL to the people they love. They also want to feel TRUSTED with inside information about how you’re doing and what your challenges are, again so they can HELP and BE USEFUL.

VULNERABILITY indicates huge trust.

What is vulnerability?
VULNERABILITY is revealing your weak areas. This terrifies men because we hate weakness, as it lowers our value and social status and exposes us to potential wounding.

Women crave to see weakness so they can be useful by helping their partner grow and shield his weak points.
Read 10 tweets
4 Feb
Alright let's do this

1 retweet = 1 harsh Psychology truth
Most people take medication to solve a problem that really exists in their relationships.
70% of divorces are initiated by women,

But as a couples therapist, I've never seen even one divorce where the husband didn't have attachment issues.
Read 108 tweets
28 Jan
The weirdest part is breaking Reddit containment
You gotta wonder what those corporate board room meetings are like right now
THE WORLD
Read 10 tweets

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