"Sorry you have to put up with me!" The first time, people comfort you. The second time makes them tired. After that, it becomes exhausting.
Stop apologizing. Thank instead.
"Thank you for being so patient."
Practice gratitude.
Constant apologizing repels people as you suck away their emotional energy. "No, it's totally fine... really... please stop apologizing..." 🙄 Would you want to keep spending energy on someone who exhausts you?
But gratitude energizes people. Appreciation draws them in.
If you spend all your time apologizing, shift instead of gratitude. Find reasons to thank and compliment.
"Thank you for your patience today. You were an excellent teacher."
Avoid the urge to self-deprecate. "Thanks for being patient with my slow learning. I know I'm an idiot."
Today I'm working on my Savage Hunters series. It has suffered a long and troubled road.
I'll thread about it here for anyone interested in the process a writer follows in learning and designing an ongoing series.
I started writing this series in 2018 for my niece. I wanted to write fantasy pulp novels, and I was inspired by games like Monster Hunter to make stories about primitive tribes battling gigantic beasts. I also wanted to write for my young niece who loves games.
Writing specifically for female readers was on my heart because my niece was growing up in a world with a lack of morality tales. She loved to read, but what could I buy for her? Everything YA seemed to be about sex and drugs and more sex, plus sex on top of that.
No, the Fraternity of Excellence is extremely pro-family and rejects anti-female sentiment. This is a space designed for men to learn from each other and embrace the healthy strengths unique to men, the same as all-women groups.
"Are you paying for a group of friends?"
No, the membership fee is the hurdle to keep out the unmotivated who refuse to put skin in the game. Membership grants access to a host of experts and professionals in a range of fields ready to educate and support men in all arenas.
Most men have absolutely no idea how to talk to their wife.
Their wife says, “Talk to me!” and he answers, “What am I supposed to say?”
Women develop emotional intimacy through talking. Men don’t know how to do this.
Here’s a thread on communicating intimately with your wife:
Women tend to be happiest when they feel USEFUL to the people they love. They also want to feel TRUSTED with inside information about how you’re doing and what your challenges are, again so they can HELP and BE USEFUL.
VULNERABILITY indicates huge trust.
What is vulnerability?
VULNERABILITY is revealing your weak areas. This terrifies men because we hate weakness, as it lowers our value and social status and exposes us to potential wounding.
Women crave to see weakness so they can be useful by helping their partner grow and shield his weak points.