@KCStar @clairecmc @GovJayNixon @richfinneran @ScottSifton @JewelCommittee @LucasKunceMO @TShepard4MO @SenateDems @EricGreitens @VickyH4Congress @auctnr1 @Eric_Schmitt @JasonSmithMO @AnnLWagner @J_Hancock @RudiKellerMI @Tessa_Weinberg @MO_Independent Candidates to mock there were plenty;
my enjoyment peaked on 4/20.
Would each cretin jockey?
Their future seemed rocky
a horror show to cognoscenti.
This odd cast better to distinguish
I’ll today jot down some more English.
@eyokley

@KCStar @clairecmc @GovJayNixon @richfinneran @ScottSifton @JewelCommittee @LucasKunceMO @TShepard4MO @SenateDems @EricGreitens @VickyH4Congress @auctnr1 @Eric_Schmitt @JasonSmithMO @AnnLWagner @J_Hancock @RudiKellerMI @Tessa_Weinberg @MO_Independent @eyokley #RockyHorror’s late-night picture show
is the film I’d recommend you go
see to differentiate
each #mosen candidate
from the GOP, though they all blow.
If you cannot tell each one apart,
just “tune in” and watch Rocky;
take heart! ❤️

@KCStar @clairecmc @GovJayNixon @richfinneran @ScottSifton @JewelCommittee @LucasKunceMO @TShepard4MO @SenateDems @EricGreitens @VickyH4Congress @auctnr1 @Eric_Schmitt @JasonSmithMO @AnnLWagner @J_Hancock @RudiKellerMI @Tessa_Weinberg @MO_Independent @eyokley It was great when it all had begun!
Vicky Hartzler decided to run
civil rights to restrict from
Columbia’s District;
transphobia made it more fun.
Yet Vicky remains a dead ringer
for Columbia … her doppelgänger!

#mosen @JamesArkin

@KCStar @clairecmc @GovJayNixon @richfinneran @ScottSifton @JewelCommittee @LucasKunceMO @TShepard4MO @SenateDems @EricGreitens @VickyH4Congress @auctnr1 @Eric_Schmitt @JasonSmithMO @AnnLWagner @J_Hancock @RudiKellerMI @Tessa_Weinberg @MO_Independent @eyokley @JamesArkin Ann Wagner’s odd hairdos had lent a
resemblance to that gal Magenta.
Columbia was her friend,
but a dispute would end
their acquaintance.
This rivalry sent a
divisive, enduring big chill —
#ShowMe cat fights on Capitol Hill!

#mosen

@KCStar @clairecmc @GovJayNixon @richfinneran @ScottSifton @JewelCommittee @LucasKunceMO @TShepard4MO @SenateDems @EricGreitens @VickyH4Congress @auctnr1 @Eric_Schmitt @JasonSmithMO @AnnLWagner @J_Hancock @RudiKellerMI @Tessa_Weinberg @MO_Independent @eyokley @JamesArkin Since Magenta’s big brother Riff Raff
mirrors AG Schmitt, I had to laugh.
Eric’s prized tuning fork
wields The Power of Bork!
Each failed amicus brief: Eric’s gaffe.
Eric’s eager on Newsmax to blare;
his arguments voters can’t bear.

@KCStar @clairecmc @GovJayNixon @richfinneran @ScottSifton @JewelCommittee @LucasKunceMO @TShepard4MO @SenateDems @EricGreitens @VickyH4Congress @auctnr1 @Eric_Schmitt @JasonSmithMO @AnnLWagner @J_Hancock @RudiKellerMI @Tessa_Weinberg @MO_Independent @eyokley @JamesArkin Jason Smith is a bit of an oaf, much like Eddie: portrayed by Meat Loaf. Eddie’s presence was missed at the banquet; more grist for the mill. Smith’s a low-watt Inhofe. Although Jason sits on Ways and Means, he knows little save for maize and beans. #mosen
@KCStar @clairecmc @GovJayNixon @richfinneran @ScottSifton @JewelCommittee @LucasKunceMO @TShepard4MO @SenateDems @EricGreitens @VickyH4Congress @auctnr1 @Eric_Schmitt @JasonSmithMO @AnnLWagner @J_Hancock @RudiKellerMI @Tessa_Weinberg @MO_Independent @eyokley @JamesArkin Billy Long’s no Criminologist, and his
Senate campaign won’t be missed.
He foresaw a strange journey:
Ed left on a gurney;
Columbia was duly pissed. Long’s
promotion? We’ve no need to fear
that the Senate gains an auctioneer.
#mosen

@KCStar @clairecmc @GovJayNixon @richfinneran @ScottSifton @JewelCommittee @LucasKunceMO @TShepard4MO @SenateDems @EricGreitens @VickyH4Congress @auctnr1 @Eric_Schmitt @JasonSmithMO @AnnLWagner @J_Hancock @RudiKellerMI @Tessa_Weinberg @MO_Independent @eyokley @JamesArkin As cretins for promotions jockey,
there’s one who’s especially cocky.
Let the Democrats win
off Greitens’ g👀fy grin!
In this entourage Eric’s Rocky.
An ex-governor-cum-Frankenstein
is the candidate most asinine.
#mosen #RockyHorror

@KCStar @clairecmc @GovJayNixon @richfinneran @ScottSifton @JewelCommittee @LucasKunceMO @TShepard4MO @SenateDems @EricGreitens @VickyH4Congress @auctnr1 @Eric_Schmitt @JasonSmithMO @AnnLWagner @J_Hancock @RudiKellerMI @Tessa_Weinberg @MO_Independent @eyokley @JamesArkin So much for my brief dissertation
on #Missouri’s sad situation
as a neurotic men’s club
seen through Rocky’s lens,
by limerick’s approximation.
Are these campaigns for real,
or a stunt? Many characters
would succeed Blunt! #mosen 👀

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More from @jchrthomas

Jun 16, 2023
@SenEricSchmitt β₀. Keinen Unterhaltungswert verliert diese Sendung, neu interpretiert. Versicherungswitze sind eigentlich spitze denn die Handlung ist mit Schmitt liiert. Die Grillkunst wurde angepriesen, der Anspruch aber abgewiesen. @SenateDems

@SenEricSchmitt @SenateDems β₁. Das Grillfest ging völlig daneben denn eines Feuerlöschers eben der ahnungslose Herr schien zu ermangeln sehr. Wer so unehrlich geht durchs Leben, läuft Gefahr sich arg zu blamieren und kann schnell das Gesicht verlieren 🤦🏼‍♂️🔥🏃🏼

Read 29 tweets
Sep 29, 2022
@KeithBeardslee @RareCamellia On his shortcomings Eric won’t dwell
his vote enabled farmland to sell
to concerns overseas:
Brazilians & Chinese.
None of it to Eric rings a bell?
Yet his vote to enable Smithfield
greater gov’t graft came to yield.
@buschvalentine

@KeithBeardslee @RareCamellia @buschvalentine The AG to a #steakfry went stag to impersonate knowledge of ag for his upcoming race, Blunt’s vacant seat to chase. His #hypocrisy made voters gag, especially folks who are rural … #frivolouslawsuits are his cure-all. @MOLegDems 🌱

@KeithBeardslee @RareCamellia @buschvalentine @MOLegDems The AG to a #steakfry stag went. Many reckon $10K he spent his arguments and pleas to translate to Chinese. Of all people this litigious gent sees himself for Blunt’s seat qualified. About RAGA robocalls Schmitt lied.

@MoSenDems 🌱

Read 4 tweets
Sep 29, 2022
@Eric_Schmitt @JennaEllisEsq Although funded at taxpayer cost
Eric’s posturing can still exhaust.
With #freetime on his hands
for new campaign grandstands
Eric’s past reputation he lost
once he chose theatrics to rehearse
by abusing the taxpayer’s purse.
@EllenLWeintraub @SeanJCooksey
@Eric_Schmitt @JennaEllisEsq @EllenLWeintraub Eric Schmitt works for the gov’t;
public funds he improperly spent.
His trip to #HoltsSummit
let confidence plummet
in this overly litigious gent.
Always seeking more publicity
this AG lacks authenticity. 📸
@EllenLWeintraub @ShanaMBroussard
@SeanJCooksey
@Eric_Schmitt @JennaEllisEsq @EllenLWeintraub @ShanaMBroussard @SeanJCooksey AG Schmitt: a lawyer we don’t need.
His own office budget dry he’d bleed
bogus suits to rehearse
as his repute grew worse
while his authority he’d exceed. His
tax-financed trip to #HoltsSummit
his credibility let plummet. #mosen
@buschvalentine @JohnWoodMO
Read 20 tweets
Sep 28, 2022
@Eric_Schmitt @NRSC 1/ Kennen Sie schon das #Telekolleg? Damals schien Fernsehen minder schräg. 📺 Ja, ohne Verblendung ging Bildung auf Sendung. Heutzutage kann Bildung erregen nur kleinere Einschaltquoten … die Politiker sind Chaoten. 📸 @jeffroe 🍻

@Eric_Schmitt @NRSC @jeffroe 2/ Keinen Unterhaltungswert verliert diese Sendung, neu interpretiert. Versicherungswitze sind eigentlich spitze denn die Handlung ist mit Schmitt liiert. Die Grillkunst wurde angepriesen, der Anspruch aber abgewiesen. 🍻 @EricTrump

Read 31 tweets
Sep 28, 2022
@Eric_Schmitt 1/ Kennen Sie schon das #Telekolleg? Damals schien Fernsehen minder schräg. 📺 Ja, ohne Verblendung ging Bildung auf Sendung. Heutzutage kann Bildung erregen nur kleinere Einschaltquoten … die Politiker sind Chaoten. 📸 @jeffroe 🍻

@Eric_Schmitt @jeffroe 2/ Keinen Unterhaltungswert verliert diese Sendung, neu interpretiert. Versicherungswitze sind eigentlich spitze denn die Handlung ist mit Schmitt liiert. Die Grillkunst wurde angepriesen, der Anspruch aber abgewiesen. 🍻 @EricTrump

@Eric_Schmitt @jeffroe @EricTrump 3/ Das Grillfest ging völlig daneben denn eines Feuerlöschers eben dieser glücklose Herr schien zu ermangeln sehr. Wer grob unehrlich geht durchs Leben, läuft Gefahr sich arg zu blamieren und darauf Wahlen zu verlieren. @NRSC 📉 @dscc 🍻 @buschvalentine 🗳️
Read 17 tweets
Aug 26, 2022
@Eric_Schmitt @TeamCavuto The AG went stag to a #steakfry to let on like a regular guy rather than ex-#ViceChair of the RAGA affair impelling him later to deny his own role making vile robocalls to attack Congress’s hallowed halls. @DougBeck562 @Flip_MO_Blue

@Eric_Schmitt @TeamCavuto @DougBeck562 @Flip_MO_Blue The AG to a #steakfry stag went. Many reckon $10,000 he spent his arguments and pleas to translate to Chinese. Of all people this litigious gent sees himself for Blunt’s seat qualified. About RAGA robocalls Schmitt lied. @sbarrett01

@Eric_Schmitt @TeamCavuto @DougBeck562 @Flip_MO_Blue @sbarrett01 The AG to a #steakfry went stag to impersonate knowledge of ag for his upcoming race, Blunt’s vacant seat to chase. His hypocrisy makes voters gag, especially folks who are rural: #frivolouslawsuits are his cure-all. @piper4missouri

Read 5 tweets

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