Thread by @AlexKubiakowska

THREAD 1/18
This week marks #MentalHealthAwarenessWeek.

This is a cycle of how the #BuildingSafetyCrisis and living in in block under 9 metres with ACM cladding and all the other defects has affected me in just under 8 months 👇

#EndOurCladdingScandal
#NotJustCladding

Part 1: Lack of sleep.
Going to bed and thinking "what happens if there is a fire and we don't wake up?".

Turn on all phone sounds in case neighbours call. Prepare "emergency" box with key valuables/docs in case we need to flee the flat. 2/18

Part 2: The tears.
And there were a lot of them from the minute we found out our building was not safe. #WakingWatch parked outside our front door the very next day.

We learnt we had same cladding as #Grenfell, missing cavity barriers, balconies are rubbish - the whole hog. 3/18

Part 3: A new reality.

My husband only agreed to us putting up a tree and lights in December if we bought a fire extinguisher in case everything went to shit.
He had a valid point.
It's still here, just in case.
4/18

Part 4: The battle to be heard.

Daily emails to housing association. On top of work, babysitting #WakingWatch and trying to remain calm in a flammable flat in a pandemic. Not being able to see friends or family hitting hard. 5/18

Part 5: Feeling like a "nuisance" and a "trouble maker".

Tired of emailing housing association for update. Withdrawn and flappy. Irritated at everything and everyone. Why is this happening to us. Battling some demons. 6/18

Part 6: Hope.

Gov to make announcement, #FireSafetyBill to be challenged - pending euphoria, this could be it, we could get the help we so desperately need! 7/18

Part 7: Betrayal and abandonment.

More tears, a lot of shouting at parliament tv. Might have aged 30 years. Will it be another 30 years before all this is over. No deal for leaseholders - remain stuck. 8/18

Part 8: The family plans are on hold.

Feel like my choice to become a parent is being decided for me. My body is so tired and stressed the motor is barely running some days.

People: Are you pregnant yet? 9/18

Part 9: Rallying myself together

Had enough at this point. Volunteer with @EOCS_Official to keep me on top of things, get voices heard - do something, anything to help. Volunteer with local gardening group to kick myself out of the flat every now and then. 10/18

Part 10: Socialising

Go to the pub with friends: all I talk about is Cladding
Go to the office: Cladding
Talk to parents: Cladding
Have a zoom call with family: Cladding
Talk to husband: Cladding
Say hello to the postman: Cladding
11/18

Part 11: Time out.

Am burnt out. Can't move, crying lots.
Time to be honest and take a day to myself. Ends up being two. I dont care.
Sit on sofa, feel worse. Sleep some, feel better. Get back to things slowly, regain normal routine, take a day at a time.
12/18

Part 12: Walk

Get up three hours before work starts. Walk and walk and walk till I cant think about anything else. Feel better, clear headed for what it's worth. 13/18

Part 13: Panic

Smell burning outside our flat. Heads hanging out the window, can't see anything. Run downstairs immediately.

Neighbour nearby deciding to have a bonfire.

Angry, frustrated, email HA furious at the stupidity. Don't sleep that night. 14/18

Part 14: False promises

Are told work will start in Jan 2021 to remove cladding from building, May 2021 and its still there. Now we need planning permission for a building under 9m to replace cladding?! Frustration. 15/18

Part 15: Anger.

Find out there has been another flat fire in London. Why are our gov letting people live like this? Who is next? What is it going to take? Join a protest because I'm sick of being ignored as a citizen of this City and this Country. 16/18

Part 16: Present

Stuck in limbo, tired another sleepless night. Back to work after a weekend of cladding stuff, tired but determined. If we don't fight it no one else will do it for us. 17/18

Part 17: skip to Part 1 to repeat parts of the cycle.

Hope to God that someone at @mhclg will finally question their damn morals and #EndOurCladdingScandal. 18/18